My father taught me many great gifts
- How to build the wall TRUMP: "We're going to build the wall"
- How to get a small loan with a million dollars
TRUMP: "Father gave me a small loan of a million dollars I came into Manhattan - small
loan of a million dollars - small loan of a million doll- small loan of a million dollars - small loan of a million dollars SMALL LOAN OF A MILLION DOLLARS"
- How to make fun of disabled people
TRUMP: "Ah I don't remember ! He's going like I don't remember!" ﴾͡๏̯͡๏)
Wait a minute not that one but most of all how to be a god damn bawss
TRUMP: "I'm really rich I'll show you that in a second"
Now who the fuck is calling me god damn it fuck off
Wait, what's that?
What are you saying?!
My dad...
*looks awkwardly at tin foil*
Donald Trump
*looks awkwardly at tin foil again*
*The tension, it hurts*
Is on the hospital? (Amazing grammar pewdz)
And I'm the only surgeon that can save him?
*puts tin foil down*
Oh gawd.
This is my calling.
Let's go.
Donald.
Donald can you hear me? I'm crying (;´༎ຶД༎ຶ`)
*sniff*
But now is norr no time for tears.
Don't you worry.
I will take great care of you.
Lemme just....
Lemme just touch your face a lil' bit.
Ahhh...
Ahhhh... ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Lemme run my fingers through your hair Donald.
Ahhh....
Auhhh..
Oh dat feels so natural
It feels so real
And not synthetic.
It's like an eagle landed on his face (you already made that joke)
And made a nest there.
Don't worry Donald.
Don't worry.
I will make you to be great again. (and America)
Now...
Let's have a look at the situation
Oh god!
THAT IS DISGUSTING!
*Dramatic music* Well!
I'm a professional surgeon
I'm gonna have to grab...
... the ninja star *Naruto this is your calling!*
Don't worry Donald
I've done this never before
If you die, can I have another small loan (What do you mean another..)
Okay, I am just op- opening up your ri-rib..rib case
Nothing I wouldn't do to myself
Here, Donald....
Have a drink
It's gonna be okay Donald just have a little sip
Have a little sip-sip
*ಠ_ಠ*
And a little bit is-
-A loddle bit of sip for that
*bzz bzz liek a bee*
Don't worry it's health-
It's good for you
It's Donald Trump quality product
*Smashing bottle noises* whoops (wow great job pewdz)
What item could possibly be strong enough
To open up his rib case
Of course!
The Trump Tower™
*Trump Tower is destroyed* No! *ohh noo soo sad cry cry cry*
What about this golden tomahawk?
Shhit we're running out of options!
Gawd I forgot how difficult this game was
If anything happens to you Trump
I will NEVER FORGIVE MYSELF.
*Weird organ noises*
I am an expert surgeon!
There it is!
The rib case is open!
Excellent job Dr. Kjellberg (wow so amaze much excellent such surgeon gold star)
Thank you very much!
I got your lung Trump.
Smell it
*Intense sniff*
THAT'S THE SMELL OF FREEDOM
It also goes for a great hat,
*tehe*
and a pillow friend.
We haven't got much time Trump.
America needs you!
America's counting on you!
Look you're a unicorn. (Beautiful)
Aw shit I didn't even mean to pull that out. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
*He doesn't need it anyway*
Garbage
What the fuck is this Donald -
-You actually have a heart?! (Wow! He does?)
I thought you were dead inside - What the fuck?!
This is like that Korean drama I watch
Where he gets a heart transplant
And he becomes a good person
*Beep Beep Beepity Beep*
(Pewds narrating) It's actually a really good watch - (woman gasps) - and I would really recommend watching it. (Cars whirring)
It's called Beating Again
Like his heart did.
This is my favorite scene from the show.
Just watch.
*Man screaming angrily in Korean*
Either way there's no- not much time to waste.
We gotta stop the bleeding.
Surgeon Edgar- OH GOD I STUNG MYSELF - (So you're a bee now? wtf?)
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!
DONALD!
Oh Donald...
*sigh*
*sad music starts playing* I stung myself..
...But don't worry. I know what I'm doing.
Yeah you like that Donald.
You fuckin' perv. (and your not? *SCOFF*)
*back to dramatic intense music* Oh god he's bleeding fast.
*calling out to imaginary people* Nurse Edgar! Do something! (I thought Edgar was the surgeon lol)
He's bleeding out goddammit!
Oh god he's bleeding more now?!
Oh god he's bleeding super much!
Steak! GRAB THE STEAK!
GODDAMMIT MY HANDS ARE TOO TINY! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
*music stops* You're gonna live Trum- goddammit he died. (good)
*hehe*
*dramatic music starts again* *Whirr whirr whirrey whirr* The fuck is making that sound?!
Demons are living inside of Donald Trump!
This should be news to no one. lol
Look you can wear this as a toupee instead Trump-
-Honestly, like it would look way better
Okay I'm gonna sting my hand on purpose. (So you ARE a bee????)
It's tiny now. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Now I can fist you daddy.
We got it!
oHMYGAWD He's bleeding fast though - *dramatic music gets faster*
Gotta get it all out.
My hand is- fucking too tiny - honestly.
WE'RE LOSING HIM
Agh - my hand is too tiny - ngh ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I can't reach itttt! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
NURSE EDGAR HURRY THE FUCK UP!
What the fuck is this - golden heart?!
Golden heart obviously.
You're my golden boy - I can't grab- I can't.
HAND ME THE SCALPEL!
*Super inteNSE TO THE MAX*
*dramatic music builds* (VICTORY)
THAT WORKED?
THAT WORKED!
U S A! U S A!
The surgery has been successfully completed!
AHH!
YES!
OH
*awkward silence* *pewds breathes in*
That'll be half uh- a million dollars.
He's gonna live.
Alright bros.
I hope you enjoyed *hehe* this episode.
I can't believe this is real.
I hope they're not gonna get sued for using Donald Trump
like this in this game. That's fucking awesome.
Would you give Donald Trump a gold heart or a stone heart?
Let me know in the comments.
Thank you so much for watching,
I am probably the first one to have ever played this game on youtube so. (nobody say anything, okay?)
You know that everyone else that's playing this game-
They're copying me.
This mask? Oh don't worry about it
All will be revealed... soon.
*kisses his fist* I'll see you bros in the next video!
And as always... Stay awesome bros! *brofist*
*Cute little outro music*
*beep beep*
PEWDS: Oh! I didn't see you there!
Um, let's play surgeon simulator!