So, it's Big Game, skit number 3
scene team Vazhen Dan and cosplay group 404 forbidden
with a skit «Pony.zip»
Dear friends, this performance includes a lot of participants from different cities
So, this skit involved people from Izhevsk, Dimitrovgrad, Samara, Orenburg, Kazan, Kirov and Surgut.
Equestria, Ponyville, present days
Good evening, gentlemen. Ich bin king Sombra, terrible villain and evil rascal.
Now you can see how I'm going to take over Equestria using my tricky plan.
It is devilishly cunning: I will demoralize little naive ponies to a state of complete moral decay!
Oh, here is the first innocent soul! Hello, dear defenseless girl! Want some candy?
Of course, man. Twenty bucks - and your *** candy will shine like crazy.
Okay, I was not ready for this. But I definitely like this offer!
Vazhen Dan and 404 Forbidden (cosband names)
Proudly presents
Mother Celestia calls (for duty)!
let's ruthlessly crush and destroy the enemy!
Soldier! Use magic!
written on the license plate: NOT YOURS
Lol, Twilight, look here - the horse. Horse in coat.
Hi, grotesque gray dude. My friend Spike and I want to save Equestria from evil Discord! You're going to help us?
You mean to say that someone dare to conquest Equestria before me? Hmm ... yeah, I'll help you.
We need six pony cuties to collect ... how are they called?
The helements… of armory.
Exactly. Pinky, are you going with us?
Actually, no, I don’t give a fuck at all.
Hey, it's my catchphrase.
Since I'm a genius, I invented the remote control with one button that does different things. Do you want to different thing happened with you?
Okay, okay, I understood.
And we already have two of six! Spike, would you call Rainbow Dash?
Hey, rainbow asshole! How about a walk out and save the world?
Yo, dude. Shit, I had a whole week without saving the world! Of course, I'm with you. Right now, only'll pick Fluttershy - it would seem that this mare stuck in her shed again.
Hey, what's that smell?
It wasn’t me. Seriously.
No, he's some kind of ...
Das ist apple strudel!
Holy Celestia, Applejack! She hooked on this stuff again? Follow me, let’s go to the apple farm!
So our excited heroes (actually, they didn’t pretend to be a heroes)
Rushed to Applejack farm, To save her from apples!
Our pragmatic heroes Will not leave her alone,
Because battle with Chaos is near, And they have to beat it!
Hey! I do not need any narrators! I can handle this on my own!
Hey, Applejack! Holy shit, she eats these apples from yesterday!
Join us, we're going somewhere for fucking something!
Shut your mouth, sugar. Until there is apples - I'm not going anywhere. Apples - it's, like, the main thing that exist in the world.
You know, it seems that this pony really in love with apples!
What do you know about apples? Even if Apple Jah will suddenly appear here, I will really think whether to go somewhere.
Sombra, no time to explain, now you're Apple Jah.
How did you do it?
Now you come with us, Verstehen?
No, you're a wrong Jah. Apple Jah - it's, like, kind of a god.
I am your god now! Bring me your virgins!
No, I'm not going anywhere. Get out of here.
Okay, we’re leaving. But we'll be back!
Spike, I have grown 20 pounds of apples, we need to sell them as quickly as possible.
I told you that I was done with it, now I have a normal job and a girlfriend.
Spike, you have no idea what you lose! Together we can build a real apple empire! You do as I need to ensure your future family ... apple family!
Look at yourself, you're addicted to these apples! I do not want to have anything to do with you, fuckin apple addict!
Our distressed heroes (they had rabbed a couple of apples before leaving)
Rushed to the shed, To find Fluttershy there!
Nothing can be heroes Do with the situation,
Because the night came, And the darkness around them.
Hey, did you hear what I said?
Spike: So, guys, Flatty’s shed must be somewhere here. Or here. Damn, why we couldn’t go during the day? Tell me, our precious spark?
Twilight Sparkle: After Discord killed Celestia and abused her remains, nobody else can raise the sun to the sky in this country!
Pinkie Pie: Hey, it's dark here! It is so good that I'm holding the hand of Spike!
Spike: I’m sorry to disappointing you, but my hand is here.
Pinkie Pie: So what it is?
Sombra: Das ist meine Drachenschlange!
PInkie Pie: Okay then.
motherfucking… erm…
Hey, Fluttershy, what the fuck is going on here?
Guys, this is not what you think. If you think that what I think you might think.
I can’t believe my eyes! Equestria is in danger, and they are slacking! Get up, lazy kebab, we have to save the world! What's wrong with you?
She's ... uh ... tired?
What is it? Blood on the chainsaw?
That's the magic. The magic of friendship.
So what will we do without this pony?
The only thing we can do is to play post-rock. Sombra, no time to explain, now you're Kurt Cobzon
Hey, Rainbow Dash, get up, we want to play!
Yep, you promised!
Hey hey hey, what are you all doing in my shed?
We need six cuties-ponies to save Equestria from Discord! But without Rainbow Dash we can’t sucseed!
Once I really loved Rainbow Dash, and I even ordered her rubber replica on Ebay.
However, something mixed up at the post office, and they sent me the wrong order ... But still, maybe it would fit instead of original?
Come on! Inflate ... I mean, show me this replica.
CRUSH! KILL! DESTROY! SWAG!
Okay, we'll take both.
Hey, what about our games? She promised!
Your country is under threat of scary monster, and you have only games in mind? Where is your patriotism?
Stalin wouldn’t approve this, comrads! Hey, where are you going? How dare you ignore me!
Our dear, our dear The most beautiful
The most cute Our dear mistress!
Fate calling me to far away, Drives away by evil wind,
Only you can save me, My dear Rarity!
Mistress Rarity!
You’re realy got me now.
Mistress Rarity, protect us from this evil horse!
Hush, boys. What happened?
Rarity, we need your help in the fight against Discord!
Of course, of course, my dear, but a little bit later. Today I am participating in a beauty contest.
Hey-Hey-Hey, we're trying to save the country, and you're building fucking babylons on the head!
What do you care? Last time you won this competition, you were in a very ... wet situation!
Hey-Hey-Hey, do you think I'm playing with you, a painted turkey?
Preparations are complete! Now it's time to show who is the most beautiful and beloved creature all over Equestria!
I hope you understand that if I lose, then I immediately fall into a depression, and will not go anywhere?
We must do something! So, Flatty, you'll take care of the judges, Horse in Coat will distract the participants, and you, Spike, will be spamming all over Facebook with requests to like and share.
Okay, but only using your account.
Good evening, youngsters. How are you?
Look, it's this moron again.
You know, at your age, I was more respectful to elders.
Dude, with all my respect - begone!
So, the title of "Miss Equestria" goes to ... Rarity!
Haha, who would doubt!
Yah it is better to go poking Rainbow Dash.
And our winner is awarded by the grand prize - a flamethrower 'Sparkle-9000'!
Thank you, it's ... it's such an honor ...
So, it's time to decide what we will do with Applejack.
CRUSH! KILL! DESTROY! SWAG!
I would have accepted this offer.
We need Applejack alive to defeat Discord! But if we can’t get rid of her apple addiction - we will not have a chance!
Hey, sweeties, I have an idea ... let me see, where are her apple plantations?
Spike: Duuude… cool, dude…
Duuude, this strange wind just blew on me... Apple Jah appeared in front of me and said that every ponnies are brothers and must help each other...
And also he said that Discord's death is in the egg, egg in the duck, duck is under my bed but I can't get it because if I bend down - I'll get stoned.
So, colleagues, let me explain the situation: the enemy on the way. He has destroyed half of the city and goes to the center, where we are.
Everybody here? Rarity? Spike? Applejack? Horse in a Coat? Hey, Horse in a Coat!
Heeey, what happening?
Sombra, no time to explain…
Enough of this, I understood. Why did you bring this necrohorse?
Necrohorse?
Yeah, she’s definitely dead.
Seriously? So that’s why she smells of dried horsemeat.
If you died - don’t move.
What have you done, Spike? She was dead, and now she’s… dead!
Honestly, folks, you’re fucked up.
Hey, it’s Apple Jah itself!
This is Discord! We have to do something!
Meet the team of superheroes "The Savers of Equestria!"
Corpse poison from Rainbow Dash body had an effect on us and we discovered new superpowers!
Now I am able to sleep without removing the sweater!
And I can shoot glance from my eyes!
And I ... for the company.
We will win Discord!
Well… good luck with this.
Okay, Twilight, everybody here. Let’s get your magic started.
What kind of magic? I thought we'd just get together and win!
Hey hey hey guys, Discord is near and we need to do something!
CRUSH, KILL, DESTROY, SWAG!
Dude, I'd like to did this, but I'm REALLY scared.
Hey, guys ... could you tell me how to get to the Kremlin's subway station?
Dude, you need to go there
Okay, thanks!
(in Tatar) Be careful, doors are closing. The next station is Gorki.
It is time to throw off the mask: Actually, I came here to conquer your country!
What did you just say?
But looking at your suffering even my evil nature can not hold the tears. So I decide to help you again!
I may not conquer Equestria, but I did a good deed and make some friends! Well, my mechanical comrade, what will we do today?
As usual, my friend Sombra! Crush, kill, destroy, swag!
Ja, Ja! Das ist Fantastisch!
Here is such a fanfic about the fight with Discord. Do you like it, girls?
Here is such a story about the children who wrote a fanfic about the fight with Discord!
Here's a Mexican's story about the story in which the children wrote a fanfic about the fight with Discord!
Here is such a ... well, nevermind. Let's go, let's go all out of here.
The End