right this way bro and be careful not to
fall if you do though the trash and
nacho cheese dip will probably save you
hahahahaha
trash nacho cheese ro I thought you were
taking me and Bart levy someplace nice
for our blind date this place sounds an
awful lot like Carlos O'Kelly's and you
know how that place makes me fire diary
right out the butt oh man
you hurt my feelings bro I wouldn't do
something like that everyone pitched in
on this you and your boyfriend Bart levy
are going to have the best Valentine's
Day date ever
they where is Bart levy I don't see him
anywhere
what you can't find him Oh No Oh God
Bart levy is all alone in Carlos
o'Kelley's he's just over there by the
front door well tell him to come inside
and make sure he doesn't take off his
blindfold he doesn't want to don't want
to hub did he tell you why it's too
dirty Lia and he won't come in unless
the assert and that it has not Carlos lo
Kelly's so this is how it's gonna be
this is what I feared most of all I
thought even though Bart levy was rich
he would understand but I guess it
really do be like that sometimes I'll go
talk with him
what the hell was that about
Manik looked [ __ ] pissed Manik hasn't
told you about his past much has he he
grew up on the streets why do you think
his idea of a romantic date spot was a
God damn rundown roller rink on the bad
side of town thankfully Sonic hasn't
noticed yet but he's fine to want to go
home when he takes the blindfold off
what's that got to do with Bartley
Bartley and man come from two different
worlds Manic is jealous and when Barth
levy says this place isn't up to his
standards Manic takes it as a personal
attack what gives you the right to step
all over this place you've never even
been here before
why if I didn't know any better I say
you're just a coward afraid to try new
things you are not as perfect as you
think you are all you have going for you
is that you have a lot of money long
beautiful hair big muscles a big buttt
clean clothes a huge house the longest
limo in the world of H plump lips you
own like 30 continents you have
admiration and respect of the entire
world you donate money to charities
every day you've got an inch by inch
replica of Willie lanka's chocalate
Factory a golden toilet made of diamonds
a diamond toilet made of gold you have a
Guinness world record of spanking
somebody's ass where you spanked my
bro's ass 20,000 times in under a minute
he was twice the size of your bodyguards
who are supposed to be the ones
protecting you you got a problem with
sir Bartleby huh [ __ ] ass sorry but you
are making me really [ __ ] mad please
no I'm sorry sorry doesn't cut the
cheese that is enough let him speak now
Manik the Hedgehog the stage is yours
what is it that was so important that
you decided to make a fool of yourself
you know none of you know what I went
through in my life to get where I am I
had to fight kill and steal justice
survive not even knowing if I would make
it to tomorrow at times when I would
feel the most down
I would come to places like this with my
crew the Rat Patrol
the Rat Patrol was a thieving guild that
well deep down in the sewers on Mobius
during Robotnik's reign we were taught
and raised by the greatest of them all
Farrell who was also my foster father
all I can hope these days is that the
other members of the organization are
okay however it's more likely that they
have all been hunted down and killed as
you can see one of them is missing a hat
because I stole it I was so [ __ ]
bad-ass at stealing [ __ ] that that is
how I got into the group in the first
place
they are you even paying attention
huh oh no sorry you were saying forget
it I'm leaving
have fun spending Valentine's Day all by
your lonesome hey Knuckles have you seen
my bro wait wait I didn't know you have
ears your bro is over there he's been
standing there for almost an hour
waiting for you sup big blue are you
ready to remove that blindfold and be
blown away did you find Bart Levy of
course I even talked with him and he
said this is the best date spot in the
whole world how a world you say well now
I'm impressed I think I have to shake
your hand well go then reach on down
I'm waiting dang what's this Manik haha
bro that's not my hand that's my ass
Jesus Mike my goodness it's squishy like
a bag of marinara sauce looks like my
baby bro has been doing some squats
maybe we could do some together sometime
I could teach you yet I'd like that baby
bro all right bro let's do it to it take
that blindfold off check it bro is this
everything you hoped for
Goddammit of all the places you could
choose it was this shitty ass roller
rink I'm sorry him so sorry bro is this
my punishment what did I do wrong
no wonder Bartleby didn't want to come
in here it smells like Dookie come on
Sonic it's not terrible man act really
thought you would like it and it's
practically empty
this way you can spend the day with just
you and Bartleby without all of the
paparazi yeah she's right Sonic how
often do you get to be alone together in
public like this now put on the skates
and show us your moves
I'm sure Bart levy wouldn't be able to
handle himself when he sees your ass
cheeks clapping together as used cait
around the rink
I've never done this before use
rollerskates I mean are you sure people
really do this for fun man quit being
such a wimp Sonic and get out there okay
up here I here I go hey look everybody I
think I'm doing it help me please I fell
somebody hold on bro I gotcha
[Music]
hey Sonic are you okay that boy's ass is
[ __ ] crazy I [ __ ] told him not to
eat that chili and bean burrito he must
have snuck it past me
a Perico sounds good right now in Dunn
woods hitting let's go to the food court
hey Knuckles do you want to see
something cool oh boy do I there's
nothing I love more and spending
Valentine's Day watching a fat man waste
his life away and a cup of coca-cola
haha Knuckles you're so funny now watch
this wait
did something happen did I miss
something he's just taking drinks and he
is acting like he's just trying them out
my bro calls it a loophole in the system
this way he can drink as much as he
wants without paying what was that's
about not paying
I certainly hope you boys aren't
planning on drinking all that soda pop
without buying any
boy with the plump and fat but I am
talking to you don't worry I'm only
taste tasting a little bit I won't take
long at all this ain't my first day on
the job son
I know full well what you are doing now
speed it up you think you're hot [ __ ]
drinking all of my soda like [ __ ]
[ __ ]
haha is kind of funny in a way do you
want to know why eventually you are
going to be done with your little games
and then you will have to buy one that's
right baby
I'm the one who's going to be laughing
last up in this piece of ass
you know I don't think I'm thirsty
anymore maybe I'll come back and buy
something tomorrow
I'll show you what happens when someone
tries to steal from me hey get away from
him bro run go go ahead Manic are you
all right
what do you think [ __ ] he just sprayed
me with pepper spray
this guy is crazier than Robotnik and
now he's going to take care of my bro
this just might be the end of the Sonic
Underground
here sexy food caught by leave my friend
alone he didn't do [ __ ] to you so why
are you mean shut your mouth bit you're
only a little [ __ ] what can you do to a
strong man like me poop on my face don't
underestimate my power
come on Manic will show him grab that
ketchup bottle and put it in my ass Wow
mama don't gotta tell me twice
this broccoli is up for anything baby
God oh God
she got ketchup in my eyes is this the
power of his [ __ ]
I had no idea anyone could crush a
ketchup bottle in their [ __ ] smelly
butt crack you got off easy the next
time you hurt my friend it will be your
head between my head it's all over now
bro
you're safe these two cool bros get to
rock another day now let's go get you a
tub of nachos the Tynan attention my
fellow ladies sand boys it's time for
our special Valentine's Day event Oh
baby I'm excited starting right now
only couples are allowed to go out on
the road so find your special someone
and pay up and don't let things get too
wild out there in other words don't have
not sex in the center of the room if I
catch you doing so I might just have to
punish you now everyone who doesn't have
a partner
please get off the rink and make way for
the lovebirds old baby let's get this
party rolling
no yet shake those fine asses little
boys you joined in too
[Music]
hey Robotnik did you know Sonic is here
what the [ __ ] are you saying
no he isn't why would that fat blue
[ __ ] come here it's Valentine's Day no
really he is look he's over there with
his friends that looks like no it can't
be it's all true Oh No
would you like us to no we are not
leaving but why is he here I figured
since he is Bartleby's [ __ ] [ __ ]
that they would have gone to a nice
restaurant or some [ __ ] not to a poor
place like this they came here for a
phone of course come on let's go say hi
to them I'm sure they wouldn't want to
fight either shut it
if they notice that I'm here they will
just laugh at me all I can do now is
show my dominance tie my skates boys
show them your sweet moves your
roundness it will leave them running in
fear
bro it's your rival the evil dr.
Robotnik and he's doing some sweet moves
I think he's trying to show you up good
gracious he isn't supposed to be on the
rink without a [ __ ] I want to stop him
and yet I am enthralled by the natural
grace and beauty of this foot man well
he's doing the splits I wonder if that
hurts his ball sack
[Music]
hey what's the matter
done
what's wrong Manic you look like you're
down in the dumps I would have expected
you to be better skating with your
brother oh well you see I was going to
skate at first but I got nervous nervous
good why it's a little embarrassing to
admit but I don't really know how to
roller skate you too high I mean that is
just crazy
who cares if you're good or not all that
matters is that you have fun I thought
so too at first but I don't know now I
was scared that they would laugh at me
outrageous
nobody would laugh at you we all have
things we aren't good at get out there
and follow your dreams nobody is going
to achieve it for you so you must be the
one to take hold of it yourself hey yeah
I'm gonna do just that
thanks a lot and you should follow your
dreams too
you know Sonic was really excited to
spend Valentine's Day with you he stayed
up all night talking about it when he
finally got in bed he checked his alarm
clock 20 times eventually he stopped
because he had to go poop then the alarm
clock finally went off he was so happy
that he ran straight here he still
didn't even wipe his stinky butt crack
thanks a lot Bartleby and good luck on
your date with my bro
Master Bartleby is something wrong how
childish of me my [ __ ] always does so
much for me everyday and what'll I do
for him sure I buy him entire McDonald's
buildings when he gets hungry and I also
once bought for him the entire little
Debbie's company because he wanted a
donut but that is something anyone can
do
is it not true love is being there for
somebody when they need you most and
Here I am refusing to skate after my
[ __ ] did all that work and just because
of a little bit of dust that I failed
no not failed I refuse to see the
problem before my eyes my [ __ ] needs me
now now fetch me my roller skate the
ones made of pure gold where the gold
was unearthed from deep below the frozen
earth of Antarctica but sir you don't
know how to roller skate well I do now
fine fine I get it already you're a
better roller blader than me stop
teasing me
hey fatso leave my [ __ ] alone stop any
business you might have with my round
dictator you can take it up with me
instead you would do yourself good to
walk away tiny man this is not concern
you one bit actually I think it kind of
does and damn it sort of pisses me off
you like that [ __ ] you want to go cause
I'm ready here I'll [ __ ] do it begin
[ __ ] ass [ __ ]
walk away or I will make you leave
really I would love to see you try [ __ ]
Oh Bartleby you came for me just like
you always do
does this mean we can't finally skate
together
I'm so [ __ ] heavy that I feel like
I'm dreaming
uh-huh of course my Beach we were always
going to skate together don't you worry
your cute little booty cheeks now dry
those tears it's time for the show hee
hee yeah
hey Robotnik or should I say [ __ ] get
ready to see what real skaters can do
[Music]
come Beach let's go home and have sex
[Music]