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dammit bro where the hell are you this
time
what's the point in making times to meet
up like this if he ain't even gonna show
i told you before we should go ahead
without him he obviously doesn't give a
[ __ ]
I'm with Knuckles on this one bro if he
doesn't show up soon
we are going inside without him
by the way are you two like dating and
[ __ ]
how about you mind your own business
[ __ ]
bro you're back it's about time
we waited all day for you sorry Manic
but me and bartel we lost track of time
during our date at the olive garden
did you know they serve unlimited
breadsticks Bartleby was able to fit a
whole basket full of them in my butt
[ __ ] why do you feel the need to say
that to everyone we walked by
shut up get serious bro
you heard what Uncle Chuck and mom said
because we cleaned the house yesterday
that gave us a single five dollar bill
we all agreed we would split the money
and have a shopping spree at dollar tree
but if you are not serious about this
well we might as well take your cut of
the cash
isn't Bartleby like the richest guy on
the planet though
why does he even get part of the cut
because Bartleby has never been inside
dollar tree
before besides that Bartleby hasn't ever
even heard of a five dollar bill
before this morning when he counts he
starts from one million
because he's so rich he's never used
dollars bills this small in his life so
it's quite the experience for him
all right we have five dollars and there
are six of us so that means we each get
about 75 cents
75 cents Manic you know that's not
enough for me
how do you expect me to buy both shampoo
and conditioner with only 75 cents
Mindy we talked about this if you are
not happy with it
you can leave as a matter of fact maybe
you should
if you did that at least the rest of us
can get a dollar
hey Bartleby isn't this exciting i
think this is our first time shopping
together
so let's make this day a memorable one
look Bartleby milk balls those are some
of my favorite candies
haha I bet they're a [ __ ] I bet they
are
hehe oh bartelby you're such a goofball
is that what you're buying
i just thought it would be funny to slap
your butt cheeks from three feet away
and it was what but bartelby
you opened it that means you have to buy
it
what are you talking about those are the
rules
if you open something in a store or you
break it you have to purchase it
but but I don't want to buy this I want
to buy candy
I'm sorry Bartleby but this is the fate
of shopping as a poor person with no
money
Bartleby are you well just buy what you
want
so I can go home
come on let's go check the frozen food
section
and see if they got a bag of frozen peas
right on now you are thinking like a bad
[ __ ]
Manic you're stealing again no I saw it
all
you also got Mindy stealing as well
relaxes
yeah this is this dollar store we can't
buy anything here for 75 cents anyway
it's certainly possible you just have to
use your money wisely
for example we could put our money
together and buy something
that comes with more than one thing that
doesn't sound like a bad idea
what kind of thing did you have in mind
well I found these two
up matching friendship bracelets i
thought you might like them
oh why to show that to your friends
obviously oh no I don't wanna get that
why just no
damn I bet this thing could unclog
boatloads of crap
hey Sonia what's the matter with you
did something happen I don't know to be
honest
for some reason Mandy didn't want to buy
friendship bracelets
Mindy isn't that the slut-looking [ __ ]
that's always following you guys around
have you ever thought that maybe she
only hangs out with you cause she's got
nothing better to do
i know she's my friend because we go to
starbucks together
hey [ __ ] can bart let me borrow 75
get out of here get the [ __ ] out of here
think you can just beg for my money
[ __ ]
i'll give you three seconds one
you [ __ ] you made me break this toilet
plunger
now I really have to buy it
well what are you doing sitting around
hurry up give me your money
fatty [ __ ] [ __ ] you
okay just take it I didn't want it
anyway
Bartleby are you ready to leave
what about you [ __ ] did you find what
you wanted
well I couldn't find anything juicy so i
think we should just go check out now
okay you lead the way i'll follow behind
your feta
hey bartelby I think there's someone
already waiting in this line
let's find another I don't see any need
a bitch
it's only one person I doubt they will
take that long
come on come the [ __ ] on you thomas
let's see
snare the two of me super
can you hurry up and skin my [ __ ] it's
my kid's birthday and I promised to make
him grilled cheese sandwiches and soup
get off my case carrot I'm [ __ ]
trying to go over here
can't you see the skinner is not working
right now
i don't like your tone bring out your
manager and
let me speak to him yes I know the drill
[ __ ]
here but get out here some forget son of
a [ __ ] runs to see you
what seems to be the problem here take a
while death
[ __ ] the machine is back to God again
i can't snap force it
and it's pleasant made up to do it give
me the can of soup
let me give it a try
oh [ __ ] this more you [ __ ]
piece of [ __ ]
is it even plugged in ziploc this is
what I was telling you about
you dumbass
well it's about time now take your suit
and get out of the store
and tell your son that he is my [ __ ] i
hope you know that I will not be
stepping foot into this door ever again
goodbye girl don't let the door hit you
on the ass
all right [ __ ] let's go Bartleby
is that you
Mandy what the what are you doing here i
i wasn't stalking you or anything I just
came here to buy some potato soup
yes I bet you were I didn't expect to
run into you here
so um how have you been lately if you
must know
i came here with my [ __ ] to buy a can
of Bushes Baked Beans
we're on a date right now that's not a
problem
is it so I i see
then I won't interrupt you take care
I'm free to help you guys over here if
you're ready to check out
all righty let's see here first I'm
supposed to
first you get the nice cashier the
product you want to buy
after that you give him the money the
product first
why not the money because you are buying
the product
after he's verified it you give him the
money to purchase it
product first money second got it sorry
I’ve never done this before usually my
butler does all the shopping
while I'm home on the toilet eating
seedless grapes
here's the money oh oh no I already
messed it up didn't i
gosh don't worry about that man take
your I'm
I'm not in any kind of hurry okay then
i will try it again um [ __ ] I hate to
ask
but what was the first step again
Bartleby can you please give him the
product now
here you go one sticky hand toy please
I'm buying it so I can slap my [ __ ]
but
excuse for your purchase please come
again
oh I don't think that would be necessary
[ __ ]
give me your sack [ __ ] and I don't mean
your ball sack because I'm not gay
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you're getting gripping you hear me I'm
already activated aside lead to harvest
now everyone knows your fear you're a
dead man
then I suppose there's no reason to hold
back then is there
that's right this you are true
hey fat man give me your [ __ ] no
bitch give him the toy I can buy you
like 50 trillion of those on the way
home
no it's more than just toy so much more
what's in this bag are the memories that
Bartleby and I made together today
i won't let anyone take that away from
us
give it to me kid I don't want to hurt
you
please something never you'll never take
this memory away
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just breathe
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just
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you can get up now [ __ ] boy the mean
man is gone now
that was a good plan we made hubbar toby
how can this be possible I shot you i
know I did
oh you want to know why my [ __ ] is
still alive and unharmed
i will tell you it all started from the
minute we entered the store
when we walked inside I saw you ducking
down behind a cardboard box like a bitch
it was so funny that I almost pooped
myself because you thought you were good
at hiding
but newsflash you're not I turned to my
bitch
and spanked his butt then I whispered
into his ear
i warned him about you and we devised a
plan in case you were to attack
i gave my [ __ ] a bulletproof vest that
cost 86 trillion dollars
that way I knew he would be safe but i
didn't stop there
no I needed to make sure you would be
found out so I told the cashier too
and I also gave him a bulletproof vest
we can't factor the nest for what you
did the police will be he recommended to
take the rubber away
i know it's not much but since you saved
everybody in this store
please take this dollar it's affected
a dollar but then that means that's
right Bartleby
it means you can buy whatever you want
in the store now I only
wish that I had a dollar as well so that
i could buy something too
yeah well you don't now go over there
and get me a shopping cart
now let's see here I wonder what i
should get
maybe you should get shut up bitch the
animal crackers here are really good
especially if you eat them with apple
juice you know what [ __ ]
I'm tired of dealing with your [ __ ]
right now you're starting to annoy me
just go back up to the front of the
store with the others
and wait for me to get done shopping
yeah run along fat boy
i only wish that I had a dollar as well
so that I could buy something too
yo bro check it out Knux got his hands
on some gumballs
you want some well there's my talking
bitch I was just coming to get you
i looked all over the store but I just
couldn't find anything that I wanted
so instead I just got you this frozen
chili dog
you did just for me oh thank you
Bartleby give it to me hold your horses
my bitch
you know the rules here at the dollar
tree before you open something in the
store
you must first buy the object by giving
the cash up money
first you give the cashier the item you
want to buy then you give the cashier
the appropriate amount of money
in exchange for getting the item back
wow Bartleby great job
i can't believe you did that all by
yourself uh-huh
come on [ __ ] you know how good I am
something as simple as buying a frozen
chili dog is easy to the likes of me
I'm going to eat this piece of ass right
now
[ __ ] that [ __ ] is still frozen you're
[ __ ] crazy
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many miles away from home
steps were difficult I'm exhausted
but I did
[Music]
is
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just breathe
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just breathe
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