so who's ready to play somewhat come on
up anybody manic is this what you called
us all out to the mall for
to play some stupid arcade machines
knuckles is right manic
we don't have time for this we promised
uncle cha
that we would stop by the panda express
food court and pick him up some spring
rolls
and fortune cookies if we don't get
those spring rolls to uncle chuck before
lunch
he's going to beat our asses with a belt
like last time
[Music]
you guys don't understand look over
there at the ticket counter
they're giving away a real playstation
5. i thought mom already bought you and
sonica playstation last week at that
barrage sale
no sonya my pink sister she bought us a
nintendo switch nobody likes that [ __ ]
but aren't those the same thing they
both play video games like overwatch
don't they sonia you're a stupid pink
[ __ ]
did i hear you retards correctly did you
actually just say you're here to win our
limited edition playstation
5. that's the funniest thing i've ever
heard it's even funnier than that time
that i forced my four-year-old brother
to eat my stinky poopy
off of a piece of white bread yet we did
what's it to you're out of luck the
playstation 5 is the hottest gaming
system of the generation
literally everybody who came into the
arcade today is
trying to win that fine piece of ass not
like anybody is going to get it
this one is the last one we've got
you're better off trying to win one of
those xbox ones
we're practically giving them away at
only three tickets
no way everybody knows xbox [ __ ]
sucks big hairy balls
manic did you even check to see how many
tickets it will cost to buy that thing
it's worth six hundred thousand tickets
ain't nobody got time for that
we'd be here all week yeah the only one
in a friend group who's good enough to
win six
000 tickets in a day would be butler b
and he doesn't seem like the type of
person who would even step foot in an
arcade
i'm sorry [ __ ] did you just say you're a
part of our friend group
nobody here even likes you [ __ ] you go
stick a pole up your ass
better yet go back to your own country
you little jamaican [ __ ]
i'm not from jamaica [ __ ] i'm from
mobies and so are you
so this isn't your country either [ __ ]
is it really so hard for you to
get along you two are always fighting
like this
sonia you know i hate [ __ ] because of
my traumatic childhood
where my dad was constantly cheating on
my mommy by bringing [ __ ] home every
single night
yes sonia and you know how i have trust
issues with people who act like they
don't want to [ __ ] me in my butt cheeks
hey now that i think about it where did
bartleby and sonic run off to weren't
they just with us
you know how they are they probably
already went back out to the car to have
sex
bart levy is probably 10 inches deep in
your brother's ass right now
so this is where you all ran off to
beach over here i found your ugly
brother and sister
bro there you are where were you guys
my [ __ ] and i are over at hot topic
bro you are not gonna believe this this
arcade is giving out a playstation 5 for
600 000 tickets
wow only six hundred thousand tickets
that's not too bad
that means we each only need to win
about a thousand tickets
how the [ __ ] did you come up with a
number like that there's only six of us
that's even better than we each only
need to win about 500 tickets
beach be honest with me do not know how
to count
manic baby my green little broccoli boy
you know i suck at playing video games
even more
the nicer strangers boys on the street
and that's a lot
how do you expect me to win any tickets
don't worry mindy i already thought of
that
just go out there and try your best i'm
a pro gamer
so i'll get enough tickets to make up
for the both of us
okay i guess i will just try ramming my
massive milk jugs into one of the
machines
i bet that will make one or two tickets
fall out
let's give it a shot then everyone i
guess there's no harm in trying
and it could be fun
[Music]
hey little bro i think we've got a group
of [ __ ] here trying to cheat the
system
there's about six of them i think
they're teaming up to try and win the
playstation 5.
what but that place takes you five he
wants to be
big brothers dude i could pack it you
will get it
my sweet baby bro don't worry the boss
told me that if nobody wins it by the
end of the day
i can take it home to you but i'm going
to need your help
when you get the time come straight over
here to the arcade
and bring my japanese katana sword too
i'm going to need it if i want to kill
bart'll be my claire of dresden
okay
[Music]
oh what was that sound are you
are you on the toilet why talking to
your big brother on the phone
what a naughty boy are you taking a
stinky poopy
hey do one more thing for me don't worry
about wiping your ass before coming near
do you think you could do that for me i
do so much for my baby
bro that i think i deserve at least this
much
all right
excuse me are you ever going to give
somebody else a turn on that game
you've been playing it for 10 minutes
well you shut that hole under your nose
i'm trying to play here [ __ ] or do you
want me to crash your head like a
meatball
[Music]
hold on don't i don't i know you from
somewhere
it [ __ ] sucked we want our money get
it back
thank you so much get those tootsie
rolls out of my goddamn
face nobody wants that [ __ ] shut up
you leave my family alone get out of my
way you stupid pink [ __ ]
shut up you're only taking your anger
out on us because of the fact that you
have cancer
oh i am sorry just give me my stupid
candy so i can go
yeah i remember you you came to my
family's haunted house one halloween
and punched my mom i thought you said
you had cancer
shouldn't you be dead or some [ __ ] i
never said i had cancer
you're the one who assumed i did but
when i tried making fun of you
saying you had cancer you look so sad
that's only because my dad makes me wear
this stupid tooth fairy costume
on the days he gets off of work early so
he can force me to suck his huge [ __ ]
balls that's why i was sad on halloween
it's daddy's fantasy or some [ __ ] but
you're also wearing the costume right
now
jackpot jackpot well would you look at
that
it seems i won the jackpot that
playstation 5 is as good as mine if i
keep this up
you're trying to win the playstation 5
[Music]
too
hey the machine says the jackpot is only
100 tickets
you're getting way more than that did
you
did you hack the machine or something
so what if i did get out of my [ __ ]
face
there you are my sweet baby sister i was
looking all over for your butt
cheeks it looks like you got a jackpot
sweet
at this rate you just might be the one
to take home the limited edition
playstation 5 gaming system
yeah i'm so good at these games big bro
that i already have 300 000 tickets
i keep getting jackpot after jackpot
sonic manic you're not going to believe
this i think this whole thing is rigged
what in heavens are you talking about
our pink sister what is rigged
why have you come before us your twin
brothers
you remember that guy by the prize
counter i just ran into his
little sister i think they hacked the
machines
so that she can win the playstation 5
before anybody else
this is troubling news indeed sister we
will all have to work at a faster pace
than
if we want to obtain the playstation 5.
quickly sonia go find knuckles and mindy
and tell them of this grave knowledge
you have uncovered
[ __ ] damn it 10 minutes and i only got
three tickets
this damn game is rigged rigged i say
and now i'm all out of gamer fuel
i need to have sleep or dingo run down
to kmart to buy me some more
[ __ ] god damn it there's no way i'm
going to win the limited edition
playstation 5 at this rate
i am dr robotnik the once ruler of
mobius i'm supposed to be better than
this
dingo what are you doing we're supposed
to be getting tickets
uh nothing dinko have you been playing
the claw machine again
even after i specifically told you not
to that thing is a waste of money you
can't even win any tickets
if robotnik doesn't get his 600 000
tickets to buy his playstation 5 by the
end of the day
he's going to throw us into the
roboticizer do you really want that
[ __ ] here he comes act natural listen up
boys
daddy ran out of his gamer fuel here's
10 bucks
i need you to run down to the store and
buy me some more do you want me to get
you the sugar free kind if they have it
quit playing games do i look like
somebody who wants sugar free
what what is it what are you looking at
huh it can't be it's sonic the hedgehog
and his gay lover as
if my day couldn't get any worse why do
these two have to show up everywhere i
go
it looks like their friends are here too
your roundness
do you think they're all working
together to try and win the playstation
5.
shut up fool i won't let that happen
that playstation 5 belongs to the
legendary dr robotnik
bro are you okay what the hell it's dr
robotnik what are you doing here
bro stop it come back here
you you [ __ ] [ __ ] don't think i'm
done yet i take more damage than this
whenever bart levy rams it into my
ass what's your problem robotnik we
haven't done anything to you
we're just here to win a playstation
that's exactly my problem green bean
that playstation 5 belongs to me
is that so you want the playstation 5 so
bad that you're willing to hurt my
personal beach right in front of me
how brave of you fat man no not brave
foolish for it has cost you your life
alfred
have one of my boys fetch me my golden
blade
the legendary sword of dresden i have
somebody here who needs to be slain
understood masterpart levy the sword of
dresden will be there in 10 seconds flat
you heard him boys get to work quickly
stand back
[Music]
get out of my way where are you
[Music]
your sword master bart levy this world
has suffered under your tyranny for long
enough dr robotnik
it is time to be rid of you and your
evil ways i will erase you from this
world
faster than my beach a raise is a plate
of chicken nuggets
no bartleby it's okay for now you don't
have to kill him
but [ __ ] this fat guy causes you so
much pain
every day of your life yes bart levy but
he is my rival
when the day comes for him to die i want
it to be by my hand
okay then take the sword of raised in
and striking down and cold-blooded
i won't do that now either maybe i will
tomorrow or the day
after that but for my family my friends
getting the playstation 5 is more
important right now whatever [ __ ]
for every second we waste right here
that girl in the tooth fairy costume is
getting more tickets
and hacking more machines she must be
getting close to 600 000
we don't have much time left sonic what
do you mean
what girl my sister sonia said she
caught a little girl hacking the
machines to win as many tickets as
possible
and the girl is also related to the guy
who owns this arcade so there's nothing
there to stop her
but that's that's so evil why would
anyone do such a thing
so then it doesn't matter how many
tickets we get
or you guys get the one who will win the
playstation 5
will be that tooth fairy [ __ ] after all
it's impossible to win 600 000 tickets
here in a single day
without cheating we all lost before we
even began
dingo why are you crying robotnik and i
were the ones winning all the tickets
keep the hand above the waist boss
bartleby sir if i may speak out of line
yes
go ahead by yourselves you may not have
enough tickets to win the prize
that you desire but dr robotnik and
barldabby's [ __ ] if the two of you put
your differences aside for just one day
then maybe
just maybe you can win that little tooth
fairy [ __ ] may be obtaining tickets
faster than everybody
but she is also alone if you all put
your tickets together then i believe you
can still
win this perhaps he does have a point i
may be evil but i hate losing even more
and i am not going to lose to some
little girl yet and i may hate you dr
robotnik but i love playstation even
more
i will get my hands on that playstation
5 even if it kills me
make no mistake i am still walking out
with the playstation 5 when this is over
we'll cross that road when we get to it
first let's focus on the here and now
okay boys
jackpot jackpot jackpot
jackpot jackpot
i'm just too good and with this win i'm
up to 598
000 tickets i just need 2 000 more
you're teaming up with dr robotnik
couldn't you have i don't know
talked it over with me first sonia
you're a girl
nobody cares what girls think girls are
good for one thing and that is making
ham and cheese sandwiches
that's right sis besides it's the only
way to beat that tooth fairy [ __ ]
i guess you're right i'm not standing to
your right
i'm standing to the left of you [ __ ] no
i mean i agree with what you're saying
oh good sorry i got confused for a
second
hurry up will ya some of us have places
to be
dad and some of us have got to get home
before six
so we can be [ __ ] in the ass are you
ever going to be done counting your
tickets fatty
there are other kids in line who want to
cash their [ __ ] in for prizes
like toys and gumballs just just give me
10 more seconds
my friends will be here any second with
the rest of my tickets
damn it i've been playing games all day
and i only have 11 tickets
and i know sleet and ningo have even
less because they're not pro gamers like
me
i can only hope sonic and his friends
have enough to make up for the 600 000
we need
loading face the hedgehogs will be here
any second robotnik sent me over here to
collect the tickets you got
so hand them over
lingo where the [ __ ] did you get this
it's a bracelet
i got it from the prize counter a little
while ago it only cost three tickets
why i don't want this it's all pink and
girly
just hurry up and give me your tickets
or robot nick is going to be mad he's
already
waiting for us but i already told you
i spent them all on that bracelet are
you kidding me
dingo we've been in this arcade since
two in the morning and all this time you
only got three tickets
sleep i'm so sorry don't talk to me i'm
mad at you
at least it's going to be you who robot
nick screams at this time
i had nothing to do with this huh
sleet where are my [ __ ] tickets i was
standing at the price counter for 10
minutes waiting for you
everybody was laughing at me because i
only had 11 tickets
the humiliation i felt was immeasurable
what are you doing with that bracelet
it's all pink and girly you some kind of
[ __ ]
i saw sleet spending all of his tickets
to buy that [ __ ]
i tried to stop him your roundness but
he overpowered me
all those tickets you see in his back
pocket are mine and he stole them from
me
what the hell are you saying these are
my tickets are you [ __ ] kidding me
sleet you had one [ __ ] job
doctor robot nikki's lying to you dingo
is the one who gave me this stupid ass
bracelet
that bracelet is not stupid
look at how many tickets that girl's got
do you think she has enough to buy the
playstation 5
you'd bet your stinky [ __ ] ass she
does she's been getting
jackpots all day long like it's nobody's
business
look at all those tickets good job sis
i mean little girl what do you say we
get to counting
if you've got 600 000 tickets the
playstation 5
is all hers
would you mind counting mine too while
you're at it
[Music]
you don't scare me fat boy that ticket
pile isn't even the big
i've taken bigger things up my ass
there's no way you managed to collect
600 000 tickets when you're alone
then i guess it's a good thing he isn't
alone
it it doesn't matter if you guys put
your tickets together
you still don't have as many tickets as
i do
what are you just standing around for
big brother i mean
prize counter guy quickly go get the
ticket counter and count my tickets
look the [ __ ] is one ticket short well
isn't that a damn shame
i wonder what happened to you all are
stick
[Music]
go on beach give the kind manual tickets
so you can take home your limited
edition playstation
5 and play video games exclusive to
playstation
like horizon zero dawn and the nike
franchise
no no this isn't fair enlighten us then
why you don't think this is fair because
these two [ __ ] are gay you could give
the playstation away to a couple of
homosexuals
the bible strictly states that
homosexuality is forbidden
and goes against the ways of god i'm
afraid the girl is right
here at this arcane we uphold and
support christian values
that includes not giving service to
[Applause]
homosexuals
why are you booing him he's right you're
only booing my brother because he told
you the truth
[ __ ] you [ __ ] you know what just
because you're all making me bad
i'm going one step further not only are
homosexuals not allowed in my arcade
anymore
but i want all women and black people
out too if you are not as white as the
toilet paper i use to wipe the [ __ ] off
my ass
get out of my hand get out
excuse me quiet down everyone i just
want to say one thing
the bible was not written by god but by
the hand of man
so regardless of what the bible may say
about me and my bitch's lifestyle
the real god up in heaven loves
everybody he doesn't care
whether you're gay or straight for we
are all his children
and if by some miracle god doesn't
approve of someone like me
or my [ __ ] [ __ ] well then he is
certainly not a god
worth worshiping
[Applause]
[Music]
stop stop cheering for him stop it
[Applause]
oh my god there's some naked boy over
there swinging around a big sword
bartleby what's going on i am so
frightened
where are you big brother where the [ __ ]
are you
are you scared sleet quick get behind me
where you'll be safe
dingo get off of me
lingo can we not do this right now
um i'm scared to dingo lil bro
i'm over here throw the fort this way
try not to hit me in my big balls
[Applause]
you have been defeated little boy
i may die here but my little brother is
going to get that playstation 5 even if
it cost me my life
go little bro grab the playstation 5 and
run all the way home
don't let bartleby catch your ass
[Music]
oh no bart what he missed no he didn't
[Applause]
go on then just just take it the
playstation
5 belongs to you now
here you go [ __ ] i think this belongs
to you
your roundness are you really just going
to let sonic and bart levy take it from
you
oh bart levy thank you i love you i love
you so much
you saw how hard bath laby worked to
make sonic happy i'm evil but even i
wouldn't take that happiness away from
them
[Music]
um not that i think bart levy and sonic
are cute couple
or anything many years
[Music]
happy birthday uncle chuck you wouldn't
believe what we had to go through to get
you this ps5
yeah sorry we're late but look we've got
your chinese food too
happy birthday uncle chuck i see so this
is why manic was so intent on winning
that playstation
before the end of the day
[Music]
thank you
[Music]
i have searched
[Music]
many years
was none there
that my soul could
depend
my soul cries out
[Music]
for your presence