WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000
(zooms oergtfdgsdzfgsdzf gdfs gdsfg n dislikes)

00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:03.960
(fades)

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No...

00:00:05.840 --> 00:00:06.340
... no...

00:00:08.160 --> 00:00:09.480
... it's not enough!

00:00:09.660 --> 00:00:10.440
(zoooooooom  in the face for no reasons)

00:00:10.780 --> 00:00:13.340
(zoom on the dislikes there is a reason this time)

00:00:15.280 --> 00:00:15.780
YouTube!

00:00:16.380 --> 00:00:18.380
You promise me power!  (lol )

00:00:18.380 --> 00:00:19.080
You said...

00:00:19.080 --> 00:00:20.740
... if I get a lotta dislikes...

00:00:21.240 --> 00:00:22.280
... I will get more views!  ( greedy pewds)

00:00:22.460 --> 00:00:23.860
I will become more powerful...

00:00:24.560 --> 00:00:25.400
... than ever!

00:00:25.400 --> 00:00:28.360
Yes, yes of course! I'm still the most powerful Youtuber on the planet...

00:00:28.560 --> 00:00:30.120
(whispers) ...I don't think you understand.

00:00:31.760 --> 00:00:32.780
I need more...

00:00:34.940 --> 00:00:36.020
I don't think you understand...

00:00:36.020 --> 00:00:38.020
... the excessive greed of a Youtuber.

00:00:38.240 --> 00:00:39.800
I know you're holding out on me Youtube...

00:00:39.860 --> 00:00:42.100
... tell me what else secrets do you have...

00:00:42.100 --> 00:00:43.440
... that can effect the algorithm!

00:00:43.440 --> 00:00:44.700
I did the likes....

00:00:44.700 --> 00:00:45.860
... I did the dislikes...

00:00:46.020 --> 00:00:47.900
... of course I'm gonna milk this fucking shit!

00:00:47.900 --> 00:00:49.440
What else you got Youtube?

00:00:49.440 --> 00:00:51.040
YouTube: "Do you not see...

00:00:51.040 --> 00:00:52.620
... my apprentice...

00:00:52.620 --> 00:00:55.640
... you are missing the third part...

00:00:56.300 --> 00:00:58.000
... the comments!"

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Comments...

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(smack)

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(laughs with a bit of cough)

00:01:03.280 --> 00:01:05.280
(darkness)

00:01:05.740 --> 00:01:07.840
(shirtless) (screams) What's fucking good?!

00:01:08.080 --> 00:01:09.880
(screams) One million comments!

00:01:10.040 --> 00:01:11.800
(screams) Can we fucking do it?!

00:01:11.800 --> 00:01:12.300
(laugh)

00:01:12.300 --> 00:01:12.800
(smack)

00:01:13.840 --> 00:01:14.720
(screams) Can this video get...

00:01:14.720 --> 00:01:16.440
(double dab) (screams) ... one million comments?!

00:01:16.900 --> 00:01:19.700
(screams) One million comments!

00:01:20.300 --> 00:01:21.440
(screams) One mill!

00:01:21.440 --> 00:01:22.340
(screams) One million comments...

00:01:22.340 --> 00:01:23.860
(screams) ... can we smash it?!

00:01:23.860 --> 00:01:24.360
(double dab) (falls) Aah!

00:01:24.360 --> 00:01:24.860
(fall noise)

00:01:26.440 --> 00:01:29.060
(screams) (video zooms in)

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(screams) (Naruto) One million comments!

00:01:31.340 --> 00:01:31.840
(thud)

00:01:31.980 --> 00:01:32.480
(thud)

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(Himouto! Umaru-Chan Opening Song) ♫ Hora Genkan kuguttara henshin da, s-- ♫

00:01:36.980 --> 00:01:38.420
(scream) One million comments...

00:01:38.420 --> 00:01:39.940
(screams) ... or I'll fuck this plant!

00:01:39.940 --> 00:01:41.280
(vacuum)

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(screams) One million com...

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(air being sucked in)

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(screams) One million comme--

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(depressed) One million comments...

00:01:48.080 --> 00:01:49.800
(depressed) ... can we smash it, everybody?

00:01:50.020 --> 00:01:50.520
(inhales)

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...Let's smash one million comments...

00:01:53.740 --> 00:01:54.920
...on this video.

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(screams) One...

00:01:55.840 --> 00:01:56.340
(close and opens door)

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(screams) ... million...

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(close and opens door)

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(screams) ... comments!

00:01:59.260 --> 00:01:59.840
(laughs)

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(dares) If we get one million comments...

00:02:01.760 --> 00:02:03.340
... I will delete my channel. (liar face)

00:02:03.360 --> 00:02:05.240
Dick pics at one million comments...

00:02:05.640 --> 00:02:06.360
... 2017!

00:02:06.680 --> 00:02:07.240
Hashtag...

00:02:07.240 --> 00:02:07.940
... let's trend it...

00:02:07.940 --> 00:02:09.760
WORLDWIDE.

00:02:09.760 --> 00:02:10.760
Vodka.

00:02:10.760 --> 00:02:12.460
(drinks vodka)

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(drinks vodka) (spills it)

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(inhales)

00:02:18.520 --> 00:02:19.960
Aaaah...

00:02:19.960 --> 00:02:21.220
... ha ha ha!

00:02:21.220 --> 00:02:22.500
(dares) One million comments...

00:02:23.340 --> 00:02:25.120
...and I'll kill myself for views.

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Can this video get...

00:02:27.720 --> 00:02:28.880
... one million?

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One million comments!

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(talks to stranger) One million...

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(looks at camera) ... comments.

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One million comments...

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Did you comment yet?

00:02:37.680 --> 00:02:38.880
(asks a stranger) Have you left a comment?

00:02:42.800 --> 00:02:44.800
(Music cuts back in)

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(scream) (moan)

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(scream) Woah!

00:02:48.800 --> 00:02:49.700
(Himouto! Umaru-Chan Opening)
♫ Genkan kuguttara henshin da ♫

00:02:49.700 --> 00:02:51.700
♫ Genkan kuguttara henshin da ♫

00:02:51.740 --> 00:02:54.960
♫ saa guutara shiyou ♫ (oooh, yay)

00:02:54.960 --> 00:02:58.840
♫ itsudatte 
"kuu! neru asobu" no san-ren conbo ♫

00:02:58.840 --> 00:02:59.860
♫ zutto, zutt- ♫

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(screams) One million...

00:03:02.380 --> 00:03:04.260
(screams)

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(screams) (zooms in)

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(screams) (zooms in) (accident)

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(screams of panicking) (accident)

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(screams) One million!

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(zooms in)

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(Naruto) (fastest run ever)

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(dramatic music) (runs) (Naruto)

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(screams) One million...

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(exhausts)

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(exhausted scream) One million com...

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(screams) Open your eyes...

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One million!

00:03:39.880 --> 00:03:41.380
(dramatic music) (lays down) (scream of exhaustion)

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*dramatic music*

00:03:45.600 --> 00:03:46.780
 

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*laughs* *dramatic music*

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(Cameraman) Umm...

00:04:11.700 --> 00:04:12.200
... what...

00:04:12.420 --> 00:04:12.920
... what should people...

00:04:12.920 --> 00:04:14.040
... actually comment?

00:04:15.380 --> 00:04:16.480
Hey, I got an idea...

00:04:16.560 --> 00:04:18.700
... why don't we just add a picture of a shitty meme?

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Kids love that shit...

00:04:20.520 --> 00:04:21.800
... they comment like crazy...

00:04:22.100 --> 00:04:22.600
(laugh with a bit of cough)

00:04:22.600 --> 00:04:23.640
... fucking morons!

00:04:24.380 --> 00:04:25.420
(Himouto! Umaru-Chan Opening)

00:04:25.420 --> 00:04:31.600
♫ U-M-R! U-M-R! UMA   janai yo   umaru! ♫ x 2

00:04:31.740 --> 00:04:36.800
♫ itsudatte 
zenshin zenrei asobi taose!   motto   motto ♫