WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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It's your friendly neighborhood,
PewDiePie here

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(Airhorn Noises)

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See

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I- I put it here now so that you know

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I'm doing the sound effects all right

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If you hear like a cool sound effect

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(My Name Jeff)

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Maybe not that one but like, uh

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(this is my vegetarian BODY)

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you know I'm the one doing that shit I control it all

00:00:23.620 --> 00:00:26.760
alright stepping it up in 2017

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family-friendly Ferix here how you doing (pretty fucking scared from you)

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today we're going to learn more about

00:00:32.400 --> 00:00:34.100
just about anything you can always

00:00:34.540 --> 00:00:37.800
expand your mind get more knowledge(old memes)

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today we got to look at developing psychic powers

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(knowledge meme and a sound effect that idfk) 
and ear rape

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that's right i just made you like the video(did you mean dislike?)

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I watched this instructional video

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and that's how I learned

00:00:49.900 --> 00:00:51.160
and i'm willing to share

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(guitar playing)

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this is an instrument. Play music by

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-o'rily?
this is an instrument. Play music by

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this is an instrument. Play music by

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itself with practice and training by someone(do we car about music show us the psychic powers i need them)

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beautiful music can be heard

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Hey I can- Hey, this one can play music by itself

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(Hatsune Miku - Vegetable Juice Popipo)

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without practice and training

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you can only produce sounds

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the same is true for your other natural talents

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like running, nurturing and using your psychic abilities

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(wat?)

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like a running nurturing and(is this the kazoo kid video ?)

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using your psychic ABILITIES

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It's just like running

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So basic part of you

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-basic
So basic part of you

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they're already within you

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-basic
they're already within you

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they're as natural to you as breathing

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-natural
they're as natural to you as breathing

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with practice and training you can also develop

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your own special psychic talents to bring

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harmony ,beauty ,and success into your life

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Well you got none of those

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- Hi
- Urgh! No!

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just like a coach or music teacher or

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guide I'll help you discover your own

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natural psychic talents and use them

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-can't wait
natural psychic talents and use them

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natural psychic talents and use them

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you use these talents every day without

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even thinking, with practice you can

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develop and use them anytime and anywhere

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(Hey what's up you guys, it's Scarce here)

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stop appearing out of randOM places

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Hi there it's Pewdiepie (laughs)

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there are 8 different types of psychic abilities

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in fact you may be using one

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or many of your psychic abilities

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already in your life

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what the fuck is this bitch talking about? I mean-

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Wait, she knows? She knows about my psychic abilities?
(Dramatic Music)

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That's right!

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Other psychic readers can als- can read other people's-

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that can feel other people's power. And my

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power- psychic- ability must be so strong

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that it intersects time from 1996 a VHS tape

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My God. My God.

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With repetition you'll just get better and you can

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practice these exercises every day in

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your daily life if you do not get

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results right away look and see where

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you block yourself where your defenses

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or fears are coming in be-

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Fuck you -huuhuhuhu

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Damn it, she knows about my blockage!
(Dramatic Music)

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No!

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Damn it! -laugh-

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Because if you're blocking yourself with me

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on this video you're certainly using

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those same blocks in your life.

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I'm not blocking you. no no no I'm not blocking

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you and that is nothing to do with my

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life okay you do not look like my mother.

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You don't know me ;_;

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this is not a class

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your abilities are already there

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the results will come

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this feels like such a fucking cult, doesn't it?

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you know talking all this mumbo jumbo

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you already have these powers

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There is several entities-
-WOAH! Stop!

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In fact, once you practice them, you can do them

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without even thinking

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and nobody can tell you're doing them ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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kind of like when you fart

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situate yourself so that your body's comfortable you can be

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-k
situate yourself so that your body's comfortable you can be

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situate yourself so that your body's comfortable you can be

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sitting or reclining and place

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-ok
sitting or reclining and place

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sitting or reclining and place

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your hands on an inanimate object

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anyone will do the size of a chair or couch or

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bed the telephone while you're talking

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the desk or table (inaudible)

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-You have to hold in an animate object
the desk or table (inaudible)

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-You have to hold in an animate object
The steering wheel of your car

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in that traffic jam and place your feet on

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the floor or the end of the couch or bed

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if you're lying down

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-yea, okay, and then?
if you're lying down

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Just let any tensions you might feel move

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through your hands into

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the inanimate object, and through your feet into the
floor

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-ok
the inanimate object, and through your feet into the
floor

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the inanimate object, and through your feet into the
floor

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Just let it flow. You may feel a tingling or rush of energy.

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(Kreygasm)
Just let it flow. You may feel a tingling or rush of energy.

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or you may feel nothing at all in your extremeties

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this is not a merger of your psychic

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abilities. We're not testing remember?!

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We are just exploring

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(Xmen Intro Music)

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-Knowledge 
(Xmen Intro Music)

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-about you two, Control my mind
(Xmen Intro Music)

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(Xmen Intro Music)

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Incredible!
(Xmen Intro Music)

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Power
(Xmen Intro Music)

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AHH!
(Xmen Intro Music)

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No, that didn't work. (._. )

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(sigh)

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Okay maybe, maybe I

00:04:48.880 --> 00:04:51.220
will never have psychic powers.

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But there's one thing, I struggled with, my

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En tyer

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LIFE!

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I never been cool at parties

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and I bet, I'm not the only one, I bet you

00:05:01.960 --> 00:05:05.440
feel the same way. Well I found it I

00:05:06.960 --> 00:05:09.020
I found it tape from 1986 that will

00:05:09.020 --> 00:05:10.560
(laugh)
I found it tape from 1986 that will

00:05:10.560 --> 00:05:13.560
that will definitely give us the right answer

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let's watch

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(Plays IT)

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Well, already the intro is extremely cool

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I know I'll never be as cool as this

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Oh it's for chil... goddamnit

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Hey, you. You've gotta watch this

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Me?
Hey, you. You've gotta watch this

00:05:28.760 --> 00:05:30.000
Hey, you. You've gotta watch this

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You won't believe your eyes. Ok, I'm gonna cut

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eh, all right
You won't believe your eyes. Ok, I'm gonna cut

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You won't believe your eyes. Ok, I'm gonna cut

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this piece of string

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yeah
this piece of string

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like so

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-okay
all right, okay, we're gonna put it in my

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all right, okay, we're gonna put it in my

00:05:38.220 --> 00:05:39.040
-Alrigh-
all right, okay, we're gonna put it in my

00:05:39.040 --> 00:05:40.100
-Okay
all right, okay, we're gonna put it in my

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all right, okay, we're gonna put it in my

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hand, bring one end over here one

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-yea
hand, bring one end over here one

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hand, bring one end over here one

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end over here. Tug on both ends of course

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and (pff) blow on it

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But it was never together

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-voila!
But it was never together

00:05:50.960 --> 00:05:52.180
OHH!

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OHHHHHHH! :O

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OHHHHH (ear rape)

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(playing his invisible 4-D drum set)

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Show off! Cool stunts, tricks and gags to amaze

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your friends!

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FUCK YEAH! :D

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A Llama!

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...

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i mean...

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camel!

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(lol)
camel!

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oh my god that's so cool how did they do

00:06:12.120 --> 00:06:12.780
that

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this set is so fucking fresh dude

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(jazz hands)

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They got a fucking cow couch with neon lights

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they got a balloon

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They got a cool dog

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with glasses

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That coffee table is off the hook- wHAT IS HAPPENING HERE!

00:06:25.920 --> 00:06:28.800
as I was saying, this is show off. Show off is

00:06:28.800 --> 00:06:31.040
about how to be the life of the party.

00:06:31.040 --> 00:06:32.400
you are about to see some of the

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funniest, most startling, outrageous, and

00:06:34.840 --> 00:06:36.140
cool tricks you've ever seen!

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damn this dawg is cool man.

00:06:38.800 --> 00:06:40.740
And remember these three rules. Number one, be cool.

00:06:40.740 --> 00:06:41.240
-ok
And remember these three rules. Number one, be cool.

00:06:41.240 --> 00:06:42.140
And remember these three rules. Number one, be cool.

00:06:42.140 --> 00:06:42.640
eh

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Fuck you. :T

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Number two, have fun!

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yeah i dun-

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I'm not into anrly-

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I don't- huh. It's not for me.

00:06:52.440 --> 00:06:54.600
Because if you're not having fun, how can you expect

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your friends to have a good time?

00:06:57.920 --> 00:07:00.500
🤔

00:07:00.500 --> 00:07:01.380
I don't know.

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And number three, have courage.

00:07:04.380 --> 00:07:06.480
Weirwood Washington would be if he hadn't had

00:07:06.480 --> 00:07:08.080
the courage to show off and throw that

00:07:08.080 --> 00:07:09.360
silver dollar across the river?

00:07:09.360 --> 00:07:11.440
Bitch you're in an instructional video, alright

00:07:11.440 --> 00:07:14.100
don't- don't get ahead of yourself boy.

00:07:14.400 --> 00:07:16.900
What would I be, if I did not have my

00:07:16.900 --> 00:07:18.560
incredible string trick?

00:07:18.640 --> 00:07:20.500
You need to set this part out before your friends come in.

00:07:21.260 --> 00:07:21.760
first to take the- ugh-

00:07:21.760 --> 00:07:22.260
(burb)
first to take the- ugh-

00:07:22.260 --> 00:07:22.760
first to take the- ugh-

00:07:22.760 --> 00:07:24.040
Wait, he's gonna teach mE?!

00:07:24.320 --> 00:07:25.840
THE STRING TRICK?!

00:07:25.840 --> 00:07:26.880
now take the middle

00:07:26.880 --> 00:07:28.840
of the string, and pull the parts out and

00:07:28.840 --> 00:07:29.600
then you twist them like this to

00:07:29.600 --> 00:07:30.280
-I do
then you twist them like this to

00:07:30.280 --> 00:07:31.500
then you twist them like this to

00:07:31.500 --> 00:07:33.040
make him look like ends

00:07:33.040 --> 00:07:33.880
Ah! :o

00:07:33.880 --> 00:07:34.720
okay..

00:07:34.720 --> 00:07:35.660
now, take the actual e-

00:07:35.660 --> 00:07:37.180
Oh he cheated! >:o

00:07:37.180 --> 00:07:38.410
-put them together so they look like they're

00:07:38.410 --> 00:07:39.340
attached-

00:07:39.340 --> 00:07:40.980
CHEATING! >:O

00:07:40.980 --> 00:07:41.820
(snake was spotted)

00:07:41.820 --> 00:07:42.860
NAHHH XO

00:07:42.860 --> 00:07:44.260
now you're ready to amaze your

00:07:44.260 --> 00:07:45.100
friends.

00:07:45.100 --> 00:07:46.540
(...)

00:07:46.540 --> 00:07:48.000
You take your scissors..

00:07:48.000 --> 00:07:50.040
and you cut horizontally..

00:07:50.040 --> 00:07:51.940
(........................................)

00:07:51.940 --> 00:07:52.820
like so.

00:07:52.820 --> 00:07:53.980
Tie on this.. and...!

00:07:53.980 --> 00:07:55.100
blow on it!

00:07:55.400 --> 00:07:56.780
(WWIII)

00:07:56.940 --> 00:07:57.720
and...

00:07:57.720 --> 00:07:59.160
the Big Finish...!

00:07:59.760 --> 00:08:00.600
ta-daaa! :D

00:08:00.600 --> 00:08:01.960
one two three!

00:08:02.440 --> 00:08:05.320
I grab the key to my daddeh's ride...

00:08:05.640 --> 00:08:09.680
i tOOK MY GIRL DOWN BY THE RIVER SIDE I'M GOING UP!

00:08:10.580 --> 00:08:13.240
upside down i'm going UP!

00:08:14.240 --> 00:08:19.220
upside down- DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, UPSIDE DOWN!

00:08:19.220 --> 00:08:20.760
(dude crashed the car)
upside down- DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, DOWN, UPSIDE DOWN!

00:08:20.760 --> 00:08:22.080
HOLY SHIT! :O

00:08:22.080 --> 00:08:23.720
THAT'S SO COOL!

00:08:23.720 --> 00:08:26.820
so strings is actually just made out of other strings.

00:08:27.180 --> 00:08:29.080
who'da thunk (english) it man

00:08:29.400 --> 00:08:30.840
That's crazy dawg.

00:08:31.000 --> 00:08:32.660
We live in a crazy world-

00:08:32.780 --> 00:08:33.740
HEY! (oh wow felix)

00:08:33.860 --> 00:08:34.540
THAT LOOKS...

00:08:35.740 --> 00:08:37.680
you see this shit? oh my god!

00:08:37.840 --> 00:08:40.639
Hey guys! Family-friendly Felix here got a magic

00:08:40.640 --> 00:08:43.500
trick for you all you need- I- I mean I have

00:08:43.500 --> 00:08:46.440
a string here and uh- as you can see it's

00:08:46.459 --> 00:08:49.160
just a string and then here we have the

00:08:49.160 --> 00:08:52.699
end of it...ugh...I'm going to cut it here and

00:08:50.500 --> 00:08:52.220
uh- I'm gonna cut it here!

00:08:53.460 --> 00:08:55.600
and then I'm going to grab it.

00:08:55.720 --> 00:08:59.420
And (rub my ass with it)you make sure you pull it and then.. uhh-

00:08:59.420 --> 00:09:01.200
(play minecarft)You say something.. uhh-(My Name jeff)

00:08:59.720 --> 00:09:04.000
something...ugh...TADAAHHH

00:09:02.640 --> 00:09:05.280
TA DAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! :D(something coming from the sealing and saying 1 2 3 and starting the music)

00:09:04.080 --> 00:09:09.300
"ONE TWO THREE, I grab the key into my daddy's ride..."

00:09:05.280 --> 00:09:09.000
I grab the key to mah daddeh's ride! (hes gonna kick your ass for it)

00:09:09.000 --> 00:09:10.480
ehh..(are you having sex or dying ?)

00:09:12.920 --> 00:09:15.320
(wtf is he trying to do now)

00:09:15.320 --> 00:09:16.780
(is he trying to break his setup or having sex with it )

00:09:16.780 --> 00:09:18.440
um lets intrest the viewers besides what pewdiepie is dowing right now

00:09:17.220 --> 00:09:19.220
*laughs like a maniac*

00:09:18.600 --> 00:09:19.280
ehum!  (MY NAME JEFFFF)

00:09:19.860 --> 00:09:20.600
(Your scaring the children Felix)

00:09:21.380 --> 00:09:21.880
(and me too)

00:09:23.820 --> 00:09:24.660
(Airhorn Sound)
Hey what's up huh? Its ya boi jacksep-

00:09:24.000 --> 00:09:27.680
*mlg horn * AYO WHATS UP ITS YOUR bOi, JACKSEP-UGH

00:09:24.660 --> 00:09:27.160
Hey what's up huh? Its ya boi jacksep-

00:09:27.160 --> 00:09:28.000
(Another Airhorn sound)
EHH

00:09:28.300 --> 00:09:30.100
It's DJ KAAHN! (Who the fuck is that)

00:09:28.500 --> 00:09:32.580
ITS DJ KHA- AH leghajahfkjk

00:09:30.100 --> 00:09:31.500
How's it goi- (lmao he failed so bad looser)

00:09:32.460 --> 00:09:35.680
Hey how's it going it's your boy jackspeticeye

00:09:32.580 --> 00:09:33.440
HEY HOW'S IT GOING

00:09:33.520 --> 00:09:35.840
it's your boy jacksepticeye

00:09:35.760 --> 00:09:36.760
Ima kill mysel-

00:09:35.840 --> 00:09:39.240
imma kill myself *shoots and mlg horns*

00:09:36.760 --> 00:09:39.100
(hes dead play that music umm i forgot what the name of it umm) just play a sad music

00:09:39.240 --> 00:09:41.240
IT'S ME *laughs*

00:09:39.280 --> 00:09:40.760
It's me huhuh

00:09:42.460 --> 00:09:44.240
(Groping  invisible girlfriend)

00:09:44.560 --> 00:09:46.400
It was me all along ( i tought it was the my name jeff guy

00:09:44.620 --> 00:09:46.620
IT WAS ME, ALL ALONG

00:09:46.400 --> 00:10:01.500
(Subtitler : I'm seriously done with adding this song's lyrics. -Limeloey) (Anothe Subtitler Named SuperSnowman3 : okay ill do it ) 1 2 3    i grabbed the key to my daddys car i took my girl  down by the river side im going up (music) upside down  im going up (music) upside down
(Other other Subtitler Named Dan Esp: Just fuck already.)

00:09:46.620 --> 00:09:47.620
"ONE, TWO, THREE!"

00:09:47.620 --> 00:09:51.380
"I GRAB THE KEY INTO MY DADDY'S RIDE"

00:09:51.380 --> 00:09:54.400
"AND TOOK MY GIRL DOWN BY THE RIVER SIDE"

00:09:54.400 --> 00:09:56.480
"I'M GOING UP!"

00:09:56.480 --> 00:09:57.820
"UPSIDE DOWN,"

00:09:57.860 --> 00:10:00.020
"I'M GOING...UP!!"

00:10:00.020 --> 00:10:02.020
"upside down..." *fades*

00:10:01.500 --> 00:10:02.000
Credits to the three Subtitlers (Limloey,  SuperSnowman3, Dan Esp) My NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE              JJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJJEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFf