WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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(On the last video) // CRY IN THE INTRO ＼(≧▽≦)／

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As you can tell...

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I'm ugly

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As you can tell,i'm dying :(

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Daurude sandstorm

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(last coughs)

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Science may be telling you differently

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But I'm broke

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Don't believe me?

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It's true

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Tell 'em Ainsley.

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You broke as fuck, boi!

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I am dying of hunger

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UUUH

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AHHH

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OUCH

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That's right everyone, I am broke!

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They tried to steal my money, so the bank blocked my card

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Some motherfucker in New York, tried to buy a computer for 26k, JEEESUS.

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You went hard and  I can respect that at least...

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I haven't got access to my bank account in 2 weeks

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I have to drink my own made coffee :c

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I have to live off pocket change

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I can't even afford buying contact lenses

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I literally... fuck it I'm blind!

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I'm like 9 days late on my rent on this office

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You may think I'm jo..I'm reall...I'm not, I'm fucking broke I have no money

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Marzia won't let me shit(

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haha

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In four days the billing goes out for my Adobe CC Premiere Editing software

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I won't be able to edit videos

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(evil Ainsley voice) You are a broke ass motherfucker

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That's right Ainsley, I am a broke ass motherfucker

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(Japanese gibberish)

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(awkward silence)

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A patreon? What is that?

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That's genius!

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I could just beg for money.

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Oh my God, yes!

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Patreon!

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(divine music)

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My favorite website from now on

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Ok, I'm gonna set up my own Patreon

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It's gonna be called poopiepie is poor

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Help!

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Listen up!
$1, you'll be able to subscribe to my channel!

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you only have to pay 1 dollar

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I think that's a pretty good k...bargain

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For 5 dollars you get this roomscape image

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I think that is a pretty good offer!

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Seven bucks -  if you pledge seven dollars you get Edgar

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Alright just fucking take IT

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You know what?!

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He's free, I don't want him! Fuck him!

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That's his penis

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Hey get out of there!

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What are you doin

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I need more ideas

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For patreons!

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(Ainsly with a heavy German accent)

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I should just look at other people's profiles and see what they do!

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Geeenius

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let's do that

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Oh woooow

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This Patreon

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If you pay 5 bucks

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*r.i.p microphone *

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You get a

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YOU GET NUDE PHOTOS!!!

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OWW

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Geeenius

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You know what? If you pay 500 bucks you get nudes

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Listen, I know you want the nudes.

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500 bucks

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aaand

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I will show you my nipples!

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Nudes seem to be aaa

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A reoccurring thing on Patreon

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you'll find it a lot

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With mediumly attractive women.

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listen!

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No disrespect

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I think it's great

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twice per year, I'll send you a personal video message

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wishing you a happy birthday

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Encouraging you with whatever you're struggling through

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or whatever  you want

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*pause*

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Hey she said "whatever you want"!

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Smiley face

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I think we all know what that means.

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I wanna pay 20 bucks just to kinda try this out

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Just to see what you get back

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If I had money, I would do it I swear.

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You said you could do whatever I want!

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Why won't you shit on camera?

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da fuck is wrong with you

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I want my 20 bucks back

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For 500,000 dollars

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I will have a private skype chat with you

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Where my dick is out the whole time

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and will be zoomed in on my genitals

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For $1,000,000

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I will have a private Skype chat with you

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Where... I play Happy Wheels

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Exclusive Let's play

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and I will screen and i will make all

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the old 2014 memes that we all love

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like

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*girl screams * AAAH he is raping meh

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Oh dad, son I don't care

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For a 1,000,000 dollars I will

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play Amnesia for 24 hours with you while I pretend to be scared

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play Amnesia for 24 hours while I pretend to be scared

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and start screaming

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BAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRREEELLLS!!

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*creepy silent soul stare and smile*

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For 2,000,000 dollars I will give you a Virtual brofist

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It looks a little bit something like *Hits mic* this

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Only just a lot better!

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Oh Boogie has a ..

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has one

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Oh!

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Pledge 100 dollars

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aaand

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you will

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get nothing

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This  is more money than many on my videos will generate in a lifetime.

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Key, maybe

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he hasn't updated this in a while but that's just

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not fucking true

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Hey guys, Scarce here

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looks like poodiepie calls out a HUUUGE youtuber

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Scarce?

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How bout yo... you're huge?

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How about that?

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Yea , I'm creating drama with you

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*laugh*

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Someone send me this Patreon

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Which is an ASMR one

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A 1000 dollars per month?

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What is this??

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*click*

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Hey honey

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OHJEEZ

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*ASMR continues* just came out from shopping ...

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Do you wanna see the new shirts I have? yes pls

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I agree, don't tell Marzia

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*terrified* OOOH!

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Oh

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OH

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WOW!

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oH!

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Ahhhhhh

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ERrgrgrgh

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You'll be so glad you did this, access granted

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to my patron-only *voice crack* feed where there will be:

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Community

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At this level

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I will be able to make youtube my full-time job

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Pretty sure it already is Grade.... Come on, I love you

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What the- what are you talking about?haha

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I assume both Grade and boogie just haven't updated theirs

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Alright, I don't really care but it is kind of funny!

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I'm serious about this bros

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I am broke! I literally have no access to money

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Here we go...

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Become...

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A brotreon TODAY

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Link is in the description

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I think you will like what you see

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Final word is inspired by this guy

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Who

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Is a 16 year old student AAAAND

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He says

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If you donate 7000 he will go to Italy with you aaand...

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it will be an amazing time where there we'll bask in the beautiful culture

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And build a new laif togethar

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So if you donate 47 million dollars ...

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We will go together to Uruguay

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aaand

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We'll build a new life together

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And I will quit youtube forever

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Sounds good become a Patreon today

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Thank you guys so much.

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Love you guys so *burp* much

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Link is in the descriptioN!

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Leave a like, every like is

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is a brofist

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BROFIST!

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No no no, they cost 5 bucks!

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You better pledge that shit first!

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That's a- that's a good second video to start with.

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So...?

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This is game ...

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*record scratching*

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I forgot to mention....

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Patreon is a great thing

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I'm not against it at all, I think it supports

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*inhale*

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AAAM

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Artists who are not quite being able to support themselves

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Because Ad revenue fucking sucks

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like...

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Aaaah, you can get a shit ton of views on youtube and

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still not really make enough to fully support yourself

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and

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if fans can support you what you do full time

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I think that's an awesome thing

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Um...

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I have no problem with that

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Just wanted that to be clear

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place

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AAAHHH

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A little bit like Neko Atsume?

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If you played that game

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You pick it up, you play it for a while

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You put it back in yout pocket

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aaaand ah

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You check it about lil' bit later.... you kno'?

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It's a really really fun game experience, that I really REALLY enjoy and

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I think it works perfect for

00:07:35.000 --> 00:07:35.500
 

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mobile

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ummm

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Oh shit I keep forgetting to click on Sponsor eagle, you can get shit from him

