WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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Hello and welcome to...

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my new show,
"Kill Yourself for Views"

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Episode 1

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There is no show, there is no challenge...

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I'm just going to eat a bunch of hot sauces.

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We discovered that..

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the content is irrelevant on YouTube these days

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It's just all about the title, so..

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I thought we'd live up to the title
and...

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end my life.

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I've been doing YouTube for 6 years, you'd think I'm above this at this point.

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I don't want to do this, I genuinely don't wan-
zoom in on my face

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I don't want to fuckin' do this.
This is dumb.

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Oh....

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My!

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Is this the challenge?

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"Lets give you a nice easy hot sauce first"

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Oh I wonder what this one could be

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It's time to eat some chicken!

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It's good ^-^

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I like it.

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Next, "LootCrate Hot-Sauce"

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I hope this one is the one that does the trick!

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Now you know this is spicy because it doesn't all come out, you know?

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It only comes out in lil' drips..

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Is this made out of..
pussy...

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It's not.

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I got nothing

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This video has been brought by "LootCrate"

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Next, "LootCrate Hot-Sauce"!

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I will say that I am starting to develop a little bit of a spice in my mouth

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Well this one doesn't smel--
OH JESUS!

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Hello! Alright, lets get it all up in there...

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"Oh My God!"

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That was so unnecessary

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Who bought these?

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I mean it's spicy...

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This one took a lil' while to...

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this one came a little later

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"I wouldn't recommend it anymore. 
Cause that one was actually..."

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"the poison one!"

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"We poisoned one!"

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"So this stuff is... fucking horrendous"

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NO!
"We poisoned one! Gotcha!"

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"Remember this? Remember this stuff?"

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You guys killed me!

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"This might put him in hospital and I just..
I just put that on camera.. so there we go."

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Oh my god!

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"Don't eat anymore, you're crazy..."

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"I put a whole pipette of this.. 
crazy stuff in it..."

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You actually did it?
"Yeah!"

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Micheal for real?
"Yeah"

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"You just ate more of it I don't know why!"

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You poisoned me!

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You fucking bitch Romanian!

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I can't talk... it burns.

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You know, part of my is angry...

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but the other part is real proud...

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that you tried to kill me.

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Next one!

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The ultimate hot sauce challenge!

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Where's that one, gimme that one
here we go...

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Jesus Chr-- You guys fed me this shit!?

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Dude this will kill me...

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This is not funny

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I will die!

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For the views!

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oh my god.

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I'm shaking look at me

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"alright, quickly!
Before that one wears off, the last hot sauce!"

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"the very last one!"

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"Warning: This sauce is very hot, use at your own ris"
Oh my god

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Oh no

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Oh no, what have I done?

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oh nooo!

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I wanna die...

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I wanna die.

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Is it that fast?

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I think I'm going to shit myself

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Why didn't you warn me about the last one!

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"Well you just drank it!"

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What the fuck is wrong with you!

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"No one had a chance, before we knew, you were drinking it from the bottle!"

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"That last one is legit- that's the only one I requested"

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It's time to review the "LootCrate"

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Alright, this is last months "LootCrate: Magic". Lets unbox it!

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Oh that feels good!

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That feels good.

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First of all we have... a t-shirt, from fantastic beasts!

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"Fantastic Beasts", have you guys watched the movie?
Did you like it?

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I'm not a big Harry Potter, I'm er-an adult!

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I'm over it, okay?

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I'm in pain

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We got, Doctor Strange figure! I'm gonna keep this in the box.. but it's really cool!

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and it looks cute, it's cool

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We have a Game of Thrones diary I think it is..

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"The night is dark.. and full of terrors"

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Just like my ass... it's full of terrors right now... except it's a diary...

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You want to start right now?
"Dear Diary..."

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"my ass is on fire.." xD

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We gotta pin

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another one huh? *yap*

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alright

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This one unlocks something epic if you goto "LootCare.com/pins"

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it feels like an alien baby is inside of me

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There we go... we gotta pin

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We got a magazine...

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"Big Trouble in lil China: escape from New York"

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this is cool

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and then we have the explanation of the artifact...

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So yeah

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It's a pretty cool lootcrate as always, it's fun to get a lootcrate every month and a...

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just get a bunch of cool stuff... for a good value... a good price

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If you like to collect figurines, LootCrate is a must

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Next months theme is "Revolution" and you order before the 19th to get that one...

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Goto "LootCrate.com/Pewds"

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Enter the code "PEWDS", you get 10% off, you guys know the drill. I really appreciate that you guys check this out..

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I think I need, 20 - 30 minuets...

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Thank you guys for watching and supporting me! *np <3*

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do you have any toilet-paper? *sure :P*