Dab
Dab on them h8rs
Hey! How's it going, bros?
My name is Pewdiepie.
Jake,
I'm a- I'm a Jake Pauler
now
Me and Jake
full disclosure
have talked in the DMs
We are friends now.
Okay?
(whizz laugh)
(giggles)
For- for real.
I did- I did speak to, uh,
Jake
after I did my videos,
the first one,
and he seemed like an alright dude.
Like, uh, talking to him
I was like, "Alright, well, this...this guy is not so bad".
But now...
The world seemed to be after
MY MAN
Jake Paul
Jek Peah (Jake Paul)
and I'M NOT OKAY WITH IT
'cus I'm a Jake Pauler, dammit. Okay?
You guys don't understand.
(sexual moan)
The dab
(sexual moan) on them
ha
ters
(dabbing on them h8rs so hard)
Er, as you sure-
I'm sure you guys know all the stuff that's going on.
For some reason,
it's what everyone's talking about.
Personally I couldn't care less, okay?
I'd rather learn how to say the name of all the pokémons backwards and what their mothers and fathers name was and their ancestry
Okay, I'd rather memorize all that shit.
But for some reason,
I know all this shit that's going on.
(laughs like he has no idea)
I have found something that WILL shock you,
okay?
We're gonna get them,
but first,
in case you don't know what's going on,
I need to fill you guys in.
My man, JP.
He's a prankster
He's an-
He's an absolute
sssssssssSAVAGE
(never before seen footage of savagery)
He plays crazy pranks on the people in his house,
the people in his life,
and that-
that's just savage.
And if you don't like it,
(dab) you can dab away. (savage)
(savage footage)
Nick Crompton: No. I swear to god.
You don't wanna know what's gonna happen if you do that.
No, no no no no no no no no no no!
Don't do it to Nick Crompton! My ba-
[Jake] I kinda do wanna know-
The only person I love more than Jake is Nick.
(Jake Paul laughing)
JP: WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO, NICK??? HUH???? Pewds: DON'T DO IT! DON'T
Nick: I'll definitely hurt you and I won't hold back. Pewds: DO IT!
Mmmmm. Jake Paulers, I never been a bitch
(spray paint dat fool)
(run for your life)
Pewds: KILL HIM! FUCK HIM UP!
Pewds: FUCK HIM UP NICK!!! FUCK HIM UP!!!
(random explosion)
He d13D...
He died everyone. (rip)
Okay, let's get to the point.
Uh, there's been this news report that came out about Jake.
I'm sure you've seen it.
In case you haven't, let's watch.
News Reporters: "Tonight, residents in a West Hollywood neighborhood are angry."
"They say they've had enough of the chaos created by a social media star known for his crazy antics."
"That man, Jake Paul, has a- has eight and a half million followers on YouTube."
"His neighbors, though, say that he's been filming dangerous stunts and he's putting people in danger".
"Chris Wolfe is live in West Hollywood tonight with a story you will see only here on "5". Chris?"
Chris: That's right, Rick and M.B. He is a social media mega star-
Heousse (?) (giggles)
He's a sociopath.
(Pewds laughing in the background) Chris: "He runs a large house in an upscale West Hollywood neighborhood."
Chris: "And this tight-knit community has become the new setting-"
How is he not ki-
Wait, he rents it?
He rents the house?
How is he not kicked out?
How?
I got kicked out for being loud for, like, 5 minutes.
TWICE!
I've been kicked out three times!
HOW THE HELL DO YOU DO IT, JAKE?
See, that's my man, Jake.
He knows how to not get kicked out.
I'm not on that level.
Chris: "And this tight-knit community has become the new setting for many of his pranks and performances."
JP: "The neighbors hate me."
JP: "But I'm still gonna flippin' send it."
(sound of disgust)
Why does he talk like that?
Chris: "He apparently makes his address no secret, and that piece of information draws an endless stream of fans,"
Chris: "mostly young girls, the day we visited, and their parents, to the property."
JP Fan: "He's funny."
JP Fan #2: "Savage"
(drop ded)
That word just got completely-
it DIED
along with that girl.
JP Fan #2: savage
Chris: "A recent stunt involved tossing furniture into an empty pool and setting the pile on fire."
Chris: "Neighbors say flames eventually grew higher than the house and as the pit with burning and smoking"
Chris: "Neighbors say flames eventually grew higher than the house and as the pit with burning and smoking," Pewds: How?
Chris: "they were fuming." Pewds: How is he not kicked-
Neighbor: "It used to be a really nice quiet street-" Pewds: -out? I don't- I don't want it
I don't want him to get kicked out.
But how in the fuck is he not kicked out?
Jesus Christ.
Chris:" -fuming." Neighbor:"It used to be a really nice and quiet street."
Neighbor:"and now we're just this, like, warzone."
Neighbor: "We're family here, and we're more than happy to have them live here if they're respectful of their neighbors
Neighbor: "But they're not."
(HONK)
But as neighbors living with us every day. We're fed up. Do they live there every day, bro
Neighbor: But as neighbors living with us every day, we're fed up.
But do they live there everyday,
bro?
(stifled laughter)
Eh heh heh.
Dab, dab, you've created a living hell out here. That's like a circus. Yeah, all the fans.
Dab (x2)
Chris: You've created a living hell out here
JP: Uh...
Chris: that's like a circus.
JP: Yeah it is.
Chris: All the fans-
I mean people like going to circuses, right? What do you say to the neighbors? Oh that are upset they're really upset
JP: I mean, people still like going to circuses, right?
Chris: What do you say to all the neighbors that are upset?
Chris: And they're REALLY upset.
JP: No, I- I honestly- Team 10: Can't beat 'em, join 'em. JP: No. I'm honestly- yeah, it's terrible. It's a bad situation. No, I feel bad for them for sure.
JP: Uh, there's nothing we could do though. The Jake Paulers are the strongest army out there.
There's nothing we could do though the Jake Paulers are the strongest army out there, dab
(JP dabs)
(the cringe slowly killing pewds)
(pain)
It hurts...
I-I-It- I'm- I- I feel like I'm getting sick again.
I-It- It's come back.
(feeling the pain)
There's no way.
There's just no way....
There's just no way it can get worse than that.
JP: I have one question for you. Chris: Yeah?
WHAT ARE THOSE? xD
JP: WHAT ARE THOOOOOOOOOOOOSE?????????
(OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!)
(Hello Darkness, My Old Friend)
I don't know how to respond to this.
This is so-
I'm so overwhelmed with the cringe.
(laughs nervously)
It's like the meme that- that was dead before it even began.
(stuttering)
I remember first hearing it.
I'm like, "Oh, that's a joke? Okay, that's cool."
Chris: I guess he didn't like my shoes, but-
(laughs)
So- so after this news media thing came out,
Jake Paul decides to do the noble thing and apologize to his neighbors.
Neighbor: I do. I do. I'm- I'm, like, I don't hate you guys.
Neighbor: I'm not one of the neighbors that, like, absolutely hates you.
But you can't... film people in Los Angeles without their consent.
Uh- It's a...
It's- It's very strict rules around there
I'm sure Jake didn't know,
but at the same time,
neighbors files eavesdropping complaint against Jake Paul,
says JP secretly recorded conversation during apology.
So there's clearly this whole thing going on between the neighbors.
They don't like him.
Jake Paul is just dabbin' on them,
Then...
the unthinkable happened.
Witness: Ohhh....
Witness: Oh, look at the axel! It's fucked up! Another witness: Yeah...
The Team 10 bus...
got destroyed on the freeway.
And here's Jake Paul's response.
JP: One of the neighbors comes over and unscrews the screws in the tire to our Team 10 van.
JP: The neighbors tried to kill us, bro.
JP: They take the nuts out.
JP: Max and the Martinez twins are driving down the road and the highway.
JP: All of a sudden they hear a noise.
JP: They're like, "what is this?"
JP: They got outside.
JP: The nuts are off of the tire, so they start driving slow on the highway.
JP: Literally the whole entire tire falls off,
JP: and they, like, the bus lop sides.
JP: They go flying in the middle of the traffic on the 101.
JP: The whole highway stops.
JP: Super dangerous situation and our neighbors are the ones that did this.
JP: Our neighbors tried to kill us and and what do we do?
JP: We just make videos for- for kids on the internet. Like, who's the bad guy here???
Jake,
you do realize that
this is potential homicide.
Y-you know they- if they actually tried to kill you, you need to call the cops.
It's not- it's not a meme after that. Like, you-
(laughs)
You can't-
You can't- they can't-
(laughs)
If someone takes the screws out of your tires
You have to-
(laughs)
That's potential murder.
I- I know people gone to jail for murder for doing that.
You can't just...
get away. (stuttering)
That's just not vlogging material anymore.
That's some serious fucking shit.
If that's true
But I have...
some evidence to
Speak differently jake I need to look after you. I can't hold this information back any longer now
I know you have some drama with your brother Logan Paul
Jake Paul posted this picture of logan Paul when he was younger when he went through an emo face Logan Paul
Shakingly angry, made a diss track as a response-
-where he madeout with Jake Paul's ex-girlfriend.
Let's watch.
*music*
ughhh
*cringes*
ughh it's so cringe
*laughs*
oh my god
I don't know what's worse,
the fact that he did it, or the fact that he thinks it's cool
like-
I know there's all bro code or whatever
you're not suppose to go with the same girl that you got
I never give a shit about that
I think it's stupid like who gives a shit
But it's his brother, okay?
And the fact that he thinks it's cool to get his ex-girlfriend
and fake kiss on a music video. It's so fucking cringeee
*cringes as music is playing*
I can't it's-
I can-
*laughs* It's so bad.
what the fuck
*laughs more*
That's almost as bad as- as kissing the same girl as your dad
Like who the fuck would do that
VIdeo: Last, but certainly not leave contestant number three step on upppp
oh no, oh no, OH NO
Video: good job!
Video: okay, that concludes or contest today
Video: of who's the best kisser, down to one last thing, the vote
Video: So, I know it's probably a very tough decision, those were all great
Video: It's a hard decision
Video: oh wow, that's good
*Cringes in disgust* [ Pewds is dying ]
Can you imagine kissing the same girl as your dad?
like that's so fucking weird, that's just so weird
Oh my god
[ Thinks about life ]
fuckkk
It's so fucking weird
I- I - I don't
can you imagine being the dad
Fuck man. I don't- sorry let's go back to the track. Okay their car got crashed
Okay
The neighbors try and kill him and what was but no one is paying attention to Logan Paul's response like watch feel really nice
right now
against him, ya know if you guys are Jake's neighbors
You guys should egg is house or take the lug nuts off the wheels of his cars go back on that one buddy
Or take the lug nuts off the wheels of his cars take the lug nuts out of the wheels of his car
[ Realization ]
Take the lug nuts out of the wheels of his car
He should take the neighbors the neighbors should do or take the lug nuts off the wheels of his car again
or take the lug nuts off the wheels of this car or take the lug nuts off the
Wheels of this car ha ha ha jake. Oh your brother is trying to kill you
There's something fishy here, okay?
*depressed sigh*
Logan pole try to kill his brother. I have solid evidence right here. Oh
Look at the axel, it's fucked up
Pewds: That's very interesting...
Jake: There's so many people who twist and turn things to make other people look bad in the media.
That's goddamn right JP
fake news Media *laugh*
What is the timeline Jake Paul is talking about fake news?
*sarcastic laugh*
Jake Paul
Is an alt-right. It has been confirmed
He's talking about fake news and if you're not convinced yet, keep watch-
JP: Double check the rumors, only witness the facts, the Jake Paulers are going up and to the right
Up and to the right?
the right???
up and- he's going up and to the-
(ooh gurl)
Jake Paul confirmed Nazi.
I KNEW IT
Knew it I knew it my man JP
I knew it my man JP
Confirmed Nazi and if you don't think so yet
Jake Paul Exits Disney Channel's Bizaardvark mid-season
JAKE PAUL GOT FIRED FROM DISNEY
Jake Paul, I never thought I'd say these words...
Welcome to the family, come here buddy. Come to daddy yeah, boyyy! *laugh*
I'm proud of you son, I'm goddamn proud of you boy