I can now manipulate my audience...
I can now make videos without any substance....
I can now make the same videos over and over and still stay relevant somehow
I HAVE DYED MY HAIR
Little teenage girls will bow before me
They will buy all my merchandise
They will click like on all my videos
Some say I am the new Tana Mongeau of the internet
Okay let's just- let's just
take out all the comparisons
uuuuuh
so you can just fu-
shu- shut up and move on
Jack Frost
Danny Phantom
Dante from Dante's Inferno
Albino kazoo kid
*sigh*
and people are already
in outrage
*reads tweet*
have you heard of VIEWS?
I can literally make a ten minute video
with no substance
about my hair
a thing that literally anyone else on the fucking planet
will not care about
*reads article title*
WHY DID HE DO IT?
wha-ha-ha-ha
I mean it's practically been covered
by every news media outlet IN THE WORLD
now speaking of pewdiepie, he tweeted out today
saying "just thought I look really cute in this picture..
.. I will probably delete later"
showing here that now he dyed his hair white
and he's putting makeup on
so I guess pewdiepie has a whole new look now
the fuck did you say?
Scarce? so I guess pewdiepie has a whole new look now
are you trying to make fun of my hair, Scarce?
*spits* (eww)
you piece of fucking shit
you're mocking ME
for my physical appearance?
how could you do that?
I am disappointed in you Scarce
I thought you were better than that
let's see what you guys thought about my haircut
'cause your opinions matter more to me than anyone else's
*reads tweet*
*MCR playing*
*reads tweet*
oh goddammit
forgot about Gerard
I'm a little scared how fuckable I am with makeup
smash or pass?
make your pick (everyone comment SMASH!)
*reads tweet*
listen, I will do anything -anything-
to get out of this youtube hellhole, okay?
*reads tweet*
fuck, now I'm all paranoid about my hair and shit, stop
oh, OH SHITT i forgot!
hey, how's it going bros, my name is peewdiepie
and welcome to..
fridays with peeewdiepiee
FRIDAYS WITH PEEEEEEWDIEPIEE
I wanted - actually - you know
all jokes aside, I wanted to make an update video today, it's been a while
I know I've been bitching and complaining a lot lately
and I wanna say: I am sorry
I wanted this video to be positive
so let's talk about some positive things
*thinking 'bout life*
it's kinda hard, isn't it?
uhh
uhh the mod- you-.. I can't- oh I got a- oh yeah!
I got an update on the whole moderator things
uh I said I would add you guys as moderators
well, turns out I can't (okay poods don't be sad)
I tried three times now, I add people as moderators
whenever I refresh the page, they're all gone
so that's really good, that that feature is there
it's not really positive, is it?
oh, of course I know
AYEEE Tuber has the Valentines Day update
it's actually really cool
I know a lot of you are like:
"uhh, no one plays the game anymore"
yeah, really- really funny
there is a lot of people playing the game
myself included!
and in fact, anyone who is cool like me
is playing the game, look how I'm playing right now
this event is only lasting twelve days
so if you wanna get like the unique items
you can only get it during these days
so if you have the game, install, check it out
and download, uhh
there's also a new feature called 'Networks'
where you basically can join eachothers networks
it's pretty cool
you can join my network
called: plzkillme
honestly, I am blown away by the creativity of people playing the game
'cause the net- the online feature is working really well now
I think when the game was new
there was too many people playing it
and it just didn't work properly
seeing how well people implement the themes
is just- it's so cool to see people being creative
so this- this theme was pewdiepie
this is the winner, it's so cool
uhh, this is the second, this is the third
oh yeah, I ranked 232 in my own fucking game
about myself
*claps*
bravo me, good job Felix
a lot of you guys have also been asking about Slippy,
is he alive? haha pff
I wouldn't just kill Slippy, I'm not a fucking psychopath
clip of previous video -go watch it if you haven't already-
oh wait..
anyway, I'll show you-
look, he's fine
say something slippy, tell them you're fine
just don't shit on me right now
you look like Draco Malfoy caught aids
wh- ehh
Slippy, you did not have to comment about my hair
it's a compliment
okay fine
you wanna go back, don't you?
how 'bout you give me a kiss first?
no please, the aids
thank you
see, he didn't even take a shit
bluhh
oh shit, I forgot about the most important update
we're in the office, ehh
we are in the old penguin-
penguin- club penguin office
and last video I did
you guys basically crashed the servers of the game
so I'm proud of you, basically our job was to- to stop penguin from dying
and we crashed the servers that's-
that's pretty good
I love this new office, it's coming together really nicely
downstairs, we're literally shooting a show
called: Scare Pewdiepie: Game Over
not sure if I'm allowed to say that, but it's really cool!
they r- they literally built the set in like, just a few days
and we can use it afterwards, so
I'm so proud, I'm so- I hehehehe
I really love doing bigger show and stuff like that
the problem is I don't have time for it,
it always involves me like going to LA or something like that
and the fact that I can literally just go downstairs
to shoot a show
is so fucking cool to me
I'm so thrilled about this office
and I really, really, really
don't wanna get thrown out
but yeah, it's almost like a dream come true to just have everything here
I love this space,
umm
more youtubers coming in: PJ's been using it a lot,
um, Marzia's been using it and uhh
it's just got a good vibe in there, I really enjoy it
so, there's a lot of stuff going on..
here is the set
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMarkiplierrrrrrrrrrr
It's CinnamonToastKen everyone
uuuh uuull
just kidding, it's Edgar
JEEZ
oh my God..
I broke it..
oh no..
if anyone asks, that was not me, okay?
so stepping up the game in 2017
haha
this is not a vlogging camera, this is fucking awkward as hell to hold
we have this
chalk-pillar
that's everyone's been
drawing all kinds of shit on, PJ especially and his friends
I especially appreciate this Donald Trump
I know a lot of people are going to look at this and be like:
"Oh PewDiePie has an office now, he's treating youtube as a job"
I always used to think that
it would - ehh
I had so much advantage, because
it's like I could just record at home and I can just do
everything at home, but I find that
it's so much better to seperate your home and my job, I guess youtube is my job there you go everyone
I waste less time if I go somewhere to record my videos
and when I'm home, I can just relax, and turn everything off
which is really hard as a youtuber
so, pro tip: if you're a youtuber and you can afford getting an office
get an office!
anyway, let's go back
Jesus Christ Ainsley is fucking terrifying
my God
so that's, you know, actually something positive
hey, I did it!
didn't even have to force it out
okay, well I need to force out some, some positivity as well
so, it feels really good
to
just sit down, and not having to get ready and talk to you guys
just wanna apologize for the way I look and the way I sound ( why?? )
you guys are my best friends
I always wanna keep it real with you guys
but honestly it feels really really good just to not have to get ready and like, sit down and talk to you guys
uhm, no
for real, thank you for all the support as always
I feel like people are finally getting over these fucking comments with like,
"I wi- I wish- I wish he'd just play a game", and
and all these fucking like, "I prefer poodiepie in 1984"
I've seen people making these jokes
instead and that's
it's really nice that people are finally getting over it
and I just kinda can do what I want
and people appreciating me doing what I want
uhh, as well
I know I focus a lot on the negative,
that doesn't mean I don't see the positive
and uh, I apologize about if I'm always after like,
the dumb shit people say
and only giving them attention 'cause
there's a lot of you
that are genuinely nice people
and
uhh, you deserve some love too
so hey, if you ever left me a nice comment
I want you right now
to take your hand
and place it-
place it behind your back
and
pat yourself
give yourself a pat
and imagine that it's my hand
don't do- don't get all weird and sexual
it's just- it's just a nice little gesture
so that we can do this together
tha- okay that's enough thank you
that being said,
that's all I had to say hehehehehehe