WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en 00:00:00.120 --> 00:00:02.920 Cinnamon Toast Ken!! 00:00:03.080 --> 00:00:05.480 PEW~DIE~PIE~EYE~ 00:00:05.660 --> 00:00:07.640 YOU SON OF A BEETCH! 00:00:07.720 --> 00:00:10.160 K: You racist white privileged son of a bitch! 00:00:10.380 --> 00:00:12.960 Hey, I happen to be ALBINO in this game 00:00:12.960 --> 00:00:15.960 *triumphant music* 00:00:15.960 --> 00:00:17.280 K :pffffvv P: Your country... 00:00:16.200 --> 00:00:17.080 Your country 00:00:17.340 --> 00:00:18.340 K: OHHHH P:*laughs* 00:00:17.880 --> 00:00:19.840 Oh, hell no you didn't 00:00:18.760 --> 00:00:20.200 K: Hell no you didn't! 00:00:19.900 --> 00:00:22.740 Oh that's right I'm bringing the country card 00:00:20.200 --> 00:00:22.100 P: Oh that's right bring in the country cards! 00:00:22.200 --> 00:00:23.700 K: Oh shit! 00:00:23.700 --> 00:00:25.640 K: Oh.. your hat! BITCH 00:00:25.640 --> 00:00:27.600 P: NO YOU DID NOT SAY THAT ABOUT MY HAT! 00:00:27.600 --> 00:00:28.960 K: Ohh! Your hat- 00:00:28.960 --> 00:00:30.080 K: Ohh! Your hat- P: Your country... 00:00:30.460 --> 00:00:31.720 K: ohh ohh ohh... 00:00:31.720 --> 00:00:34.020 P: TELLS DIRTY JOKES AT FUNERALS! 00:00:34.620 --> 00:00:35.640 K: OHHHH!!! 00:00:35.640 --> 00:00:36.140 P: BOOM! 00:00:36.140 --> 00:00:36.640 K:NOOOO 00:00:36.640 --> 00:00:38.820 k:son of a--- YOUR HAT 00:00:38.820 --> 00:00:40.940 k:Was defeated...dfffdffd...DANCES LIKE! 00:00:42.980 --> 00:00:46.200 k:yeah your hat dances..(pewds laughing in the background).. what else you got to say? 00:00:46.280 --> 00:00:47.240 k:You didn't have a fucking hat! 00:00:47.240 --> 00:00:48.360 P: Okay. Wait wait wait wait! 00:00:48.580 --> 00:00:51.620 P: Your country tells dirty jokes at funerals 00:00:51.620 --> 00:00:52.920 P: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND!!!!! 00:00:52.920 --> 00:00:54.500 K: Oowwww!! Aaaand? 00:00:55.100 --> 00:00:58.200 K: Your hat dances like...a lumberjack! 00:00:58.520 --> 00:01:00.840 P: No! K: Burn! P: No! K: Burn! P: No! 00:01:00.840 --> 00:01:01.900 K: BOLOLOLOH! 00:01:01.900 --> 00:01:05.300 P: Your country tells dirty jokes at funerals aaannnd... 00:01:06.200 --> 00:01:09.240 *breathes* WAS DEFEATED BY....!! 00:01:09.900 --> 00:01:10.920 K: Oh my god. 00:01:10.920 --> 00:01:12.600 K: Oh my god! P: Better prepare. 00:01:13.020 --> 00:01:14.940 P: ...for the launch attack! 00:01:14.940 --> 00:01:16.040 K: Aaaaand! P: *laughs* 00:01:16.040 --> 00:01:18.360 *both laugh* 00:01:19.740 --> 00:01:22.040 K: Eh uh eh uh uh uh! P: Oh No! Oh No! No! No! 00:01:22.040 --> 00:01:23.200 P: No! 00:01:23.200 --> 00:01:24.540 P: I clicked the wrong button! K: You jokin'? 00:01:25.300 --> 00:01:27.140 P: Fuck! K: Worked with...! 00:01:27.920 --> 00:01:29.120 K: and worked with! 00:01:29.120 --> 00:01:30.920 P: My hat did not work with anyone! K: Your wife... 00:01:31.880 --> 00:01:32.680 K: AAAANND! 00:01:33.100 --> 00:01:33.900 P: No! Stop! 00:01:33.900 --> 00:01:36.020 P: Stop! K: ...doesn't own a colored Telly! 00:01:36.060 --> 00:01:38.500 P: NOOOOUAGHUAGHUAGH!!! 00:01:38.600 --> 00:01:40.120 K: *roars like viking* 00:01:40.120 --> 00:01:42.920 *both laugh* 00:01:42.960 --> 00:01:45.360 K: Am I done? Is that it? P: Alright 00:01:45.360 --> 00:01:48.600 P: Bring it, Ken! Bring it, motherfucker! K: Your Husband! 00:01:48.600 --> 00:01:50.920 P: No! Do not talk about my husband! 00:01:50.960 --> 00:01:52.600 K: OHOHOHOHO! 00:01:52.600 --> 00:01:54.440 P: Oh no! K: Hell yeah! 00:01:55.060 --> 00:01:58.820 P: dances like...oh fuck. No! K: Wrong grammar! Wrong grammar! 00:01:59.880 --> 00:02:01.480 K: God dang! 00:02:01.980 --> 00:02:06.980 K: Your husband...is very naughty. P: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! 00:02:07.140 --> 00:02:08.600 *Ken laughs demonically* 00:02:08.600 --> 00:02:10.520 P: An ordinary pigsty 00:02:10.740 --> 00:02:15.020 K: Yeah, alright. Your husband is very naughty 00:02:15.660 --> 00:02:17.820 K: fuck! P: yeah! wrong grammar! 00:02:17.920 --> 00:02:22.000 K: Your husband is very naughty. Ugh, give me the and. P: Aand. 00:02:22.060 --> 00:02:24.940 P: An ordinary pigsty secretly adores you! 00:02:25.040 --> 00:02:27.140 K: Oh God! And... 00:02:27.140 --> 00:02:30.840 K: doesn't like... P: and everybody knows that! 00:02:31.320 --> 00:02:33.400 P: That's right motherfucker! 00:02:33.720 --> 00:02:36.900 K: and doesn't like... YOUR PIMPLY ARSE! 00:02:36.900 --> 00:02:37.780 P: NOOOOOOOOOOO! 00:02:37.780 --> 00:02:42.260 P: My husband doesn't like my pimply arse! K: Ouwww!! 00:02:42.260 --> 00:02:45.420 Nig-: Yeah, tell him. Yeah, point that finger at him. 00:02:45.420 --> 00:02:48.680 P: My pimply arse, how did you know about my secret? 00:02:48.680 --> 00:02:49.900 K: Ready for another round? 00:02:49.900 --> 00:02:52.460 P: Oh your son... K: *breathes like a pussy* 00:02:52.460 --> 00:02:54.260 P: That's right. K: Not my thon. *in a lispy bear voice* 00:02:54.500 --> 00:02:55.220 P: Your son! 00:02:55.220 --> 00:02:56.380 K: You know what? P: Yeah? 00:02:56.380 --> 00:02:57.580 K: Yo mama! P: Noo! 00:02:57.720 --> 00:02:59.260 P: NOOOO!! 00:02:59.300 --> 00:03:00.420 P: Nooo! Your son 00:03:01.740 --> 00:03:02.620 P: looks like 00:03:02.620 --> 00:03:03.560 K: *breathes heavily* 00:03:03.560 --> 00:03:05.060 K: Oh my god. P: Oh it's comin' up 00:03:05.280 --> 00:03:06.240 K: Your mother 00:03:07.340 --> 00:03:09.540 P: You'd better not say anything about my mother, Ken. 00:03:09.540 --> 00:03:10.120 P: You nothin' but a- 00:03:10.120 --> 00:03:11.300 K: HAS BUM CANCER! 00:03:11.360 --> 00:03:13.000 P: WHAT THE FUCK?! 00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:14.440 K: *has seizure* 00:03:14.440 --> 00:03:16.040 P: How dare you say that? 00:03:16.760 --> 00:03:17.880 P: What the fuck? 00:03:17.880 --> 00:03:18.540 K: Right! 00:03:18.540 --> 00:03:21.000 P: Oh oh Okay. Alright alright alright. 00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:22.780 P: Okay okay okay. 00:03:22.820 --> 00:03:25.700 P: Well, your son looks like...A MUPPET!!! 00:03:25.720 --> 00:03:29.280 K: BOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!! *then cries* 00:03:29.400 --> 00:03:31.040 K: It's true. 00:03:31.040 --> 00:03:33.380 K: Your mother has bum cancer AAANND... 00:03:33.580 --> 00:03:35.740 P: What's worse that bum cancer? 00:03:36.080 --> 00:03:37.120 K: doesn't like 00:03:37.340 --> 00:03:39.780 P: No, you don't know what my mother likes. You don't know- 00:03:39.780 --> 00:03:41.780 K: this poor man 00:03:41.780 --> 00:03:42.760 K: *slurps* 00:03:42.760 --> 00:03:43.720 P: Uhuh. Okay. 00:03:44.980 --> 00:03:45.920 K: Sir! 00:03:46.520 --> 00:03:50.680 P: Oh, are you making a penis in the mouth? K: Oh yeah. You like that? 00:03:51.060 --> 00:03:54.180 K: You mother- P: Oh No! I do not like- ruuuuude! 00:03:54.620 --> 00:03:55.880 K: Oh ruude! 00:03:55.880 --> 00:03:58.340 P: Six teen! 00:03:58.340 --> 00:04:00.220 P: That's gotta be fifty points. K: Woohoo! 00:04:00.220 --> 00:04:02.540 K: Eight half damage! Weak! P: Fuck you! 00:04:02.920 --> 00:04:03.720 P: Fuck you! 00:04:03.720 --> 00:04:07.320 K: You! P: No! K: You, sir 00:04:07.320 --> 00:04:08.440 K: startin' out strong 00:04:09.600 --> 00:04:11.360 *both giggles deviously* 00:04:11.600 --> 00:04:13.040 P: Yo' FAAAATHAAA...! 00:04:13.040 --> 00:04:15.600 K: *inhales atmosphere* Not my papi 00:04:16.200 --> 00:04:18.040 P: Yeah, bring it up to peepee code [?] 00:04:18.240 --> 00:04:20.480 P: dances like..! K: *has asthma* 00:04:20.480 --> 00:04:23.400 K: My father does not dance. How dare you, sir? 00:04:23.400 --> 00:04:27.420 P: That's right. He's a crippled son of a bitch! 00:04:27.440 --> 00:04:28.880 K: You and your sister 00:04:29.520 --> 00:04:32.220 K:Hmmm...Hmmm... 00:04:32.420 --> 00:04:34.100 K: are not part of Europe! 00:04:34.240 --> 00:04:35.520 P: Nooooooooooo!! 00:04:36.020 --> 00:04:36.660 P: Noooo! 00:04:36.760 --> 00:04:38.120 K: Great exit, baby! 00:04:39.080 --> 00:04:42.080 P: Noooo! K: Oh god! I'm sweatin'. 00:04:42.080 --> 00:04:44.000 K: Ah. That's actually true. Brexit. 00:04:44.080 --> 00:04:46.120 *both laugh* 00:04:46.120 --> 00:04:47.080 K: You ginger! 00:04:47.080 --> 00:04:53.060 P: No, you did not call me the worst foul name in the entire English dictionary! 00:04:53.520 --> 00:04:54.320 P: Your mother 00:04:54.320 --> 00:04:56.140 P: Your mother Nig-: Hmmm... 00:04:56.160 --> 00:04:57.360 P: Your mathaa... 00:04:57.940 --> 00:04:58.740 K: A hamster 00:04:58.980 --> 00:05:01.300 K: has worse hair than P: No! No! No! 00:05:01.300 --> 00:05:03.980 P: Oh, okay. Alright. Well, your motha' 00:05:03.980 --> 00:05:06.260 P: was farted on! 00:05:06.480 --> 00:05:07.280 P: No, what? 00:05:07.300 --> 00:05:09.600 P: Noo! Nooo! 00:05:09.900 --> 00:05:11.180 P: Uwahghghgh! 00:05:11.660 --> 00:05:12.780 P: Nooo ohohohoh 00:05:13.520 --> 00:05:16.160 K: Ahh a hamster has worse hair than you! 00:05:16.440 --> 00:05:18.040 P: *realizes meaning* 00:05:18.820 --> 00:05:21.640 P: But hamsters have excellent hair, so thank you. 00:05:21.640 --> 00:05:23.400 K: You're not gonna make it, brother! 00:05:23.400 --> 00:05:24.880 K: Hamster has worse hair than... P: Spare- 00:05:26.160 --> 00:05:27.200 K: And P: No! No! 00:05:27.440 --> 00:05:32.240 P: No! K: sends you the warmest pots of dishes! 00:05:32.240 --> 00:05:33.240 P: No, I'm out of here. 00:05:34.240 --> 00:05:36.320 P: No, I can't stand it anymore! 00:05:36.880 --> 00:05:38.720 P: I can't stand it anymore. 00:05:41.020 --> 00:05:41.980 P: Ahh! Ahaah! 00:05:41.980 --> 00:05:43.280 P: I don't wanna live! 00:05:43.840 --> 00:05:47.020 P: Stop! Stop! 00:05:48.100 --> 00:05:48.740 P: Owwww! 00:05:49.940 --> 00:05:52.120 P: Na-ahhh! 00:05:56.200 --> 00:05:58.100 *drum roll* 00:06:00.060 --> 00:06:04.880 P: It's time...for round two! 00:06:05.540 --> 00:06:06.880 P: fu- fu- 00:06:06.940 --> 00:06:08.860 K: My twin brother P: Nah-No! 00:06:08.860 --> 00:06:10.900 P: twin brother, motherfucker 00:06:11.420 --> 00:06:12.860 P: This conversation 00:06:12.900 --> 00:06:15.140 P: I'm starting hard 00:06:15.140 --> 00:06:17.460 K: What about this conversation? What's wrong with this conversation? 00:06:18.820 --> 00:06:19.620 P: smells of 00:06:20.380 --> 00:06:22.140 K: Your cuntry P: Don't say 00:06:22.140 --> 00:06:24.300 P: anything about Sweden, Ke- 00:06:24.300 --> 00:06:25.400 K: is getting FAT! 00:06:26.640 --> 00:06:27.760 K: getting FAAT! *pewds has seizure* 00:06:29.780 --> 00:06:31.300 K: *laughs* Calm down. 00:06:31.300 --> 00:06:32.240 K: It's okay. P: Whaaght? 00:06:32.340 --> 00:06:36.100 K: Alright. Alright. Your country's getting fat AAANND 00:06:36.160 --> 00:06:38.420 K: *burps* has bad breath 00:06:39.460 --> 00:06:40.580 P: No fuckin' way 00:06:40.740 --> 00:06:42.340 P: How fuckin' dare you? 00:06:43.100 --> 00:06:44.680 P: How fuckn- alright K: Oooohhh P: Alright, well taste this. 00:06:44.680 --> 00:06:48.360 P: This conversation smells of your hat, motherfucker. K: Owh! 00:06:48.880 --> 00:06:50.240 K: Ooo god, I burned. 00:06:50.240 --> 00:06:53.580 P: It hurts, doesn't it? It hurts, doesn't it, when you say that? 00:06:54.080 --> 00:06:54.960 K: Your house 00:06:55.380 --> 00:06:56.580 P: Oh not my house! 00:06:56.760 --> 00:06:58.040 P: Not my hoooouse! 00:06:58.540 --> 00:06:59.420 K: Your house 00:06:59.660 --> 00:07:01.500 K: Your house is worthless! 00:07:01.720 --> 00:07:05.160 P: Not my house! I don't even own a house. How dare yo- 00:07:05.280 --> 00:07:08.160 K: What the- It can't be sold on this market. 00:07:08.920 --> 00:07:10.920 P: You stalked....YOUR WIFE! 00:07:12.260 --> 00:07:13.460 K: *uses inhaler* 00:07:14.140 --> 00:07:15.660 P: *fires machine gun* 00:07:16.640 --> 00:07:18.960 P: Your mother....is full of eels! 00:07:19.280 --> 00:07:21.280 K: Oh, not the hig Tyson pie [?] 00:07:21.320 --> 00:07:25.280 *both laughs at inside joke* 00:07:25.280 --> 00:07:27.160 P: Your mother is full of eels 00:07:27.600 --> 00:07:28.880 K: What you got now? 00:07:30.100 --> 00:07:31.280 P: I bet! 00:07:31.380 --> 00:07:35.840 *both laugh* P: BUUUUUURRRRNN! 00:07:36.160 --> 00:07:38.720 K: Your [inaudible] armpit yourself. 00:07:39.500 --> 00:07:40.860 K: Your son P: Noooo! 00:07:41.360 --> 00:07:44.000 P: Not my kettle, he would never do that. 00:07:44.120 --> 00:07:46.680 P: No. Please. No more about my kettle. 00:07:46.680 --> 00:07:48.160 K: Is... 00:07:48.160 --> 00:07:49.440 P: No please. Stop! 00:07:50.080 --> 00:07:52.080 *both laugh* 00:07:52.140 --> 00:07:53.340 K: and wanted to be 00:07:53.340 --> 00:07:55.540 P: Grab 'em motherfucker K: This conversation 00:07:56.100 --> 00:07:57.620 P: Uhuh, what about it? 00:07:57.620 --> 00:07:59.200 P: What about this conversation, Ken? 00:07:59.360 --> 00:08:01.760 K: THAT'S RACIST! P: *thumps table* 00:08:02.060 --> 00:08:05.100 P: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! *while thumping table* 00:08:06.380 --> 00:08:08.220 K: You racist son of a bitch! 00:08:08.220 --> 00:08:09.940 K: I knew it! 00:08:09.940 --> 00:08:11.700 P: Your country, your shitty America 00:08:11.700 --> 00:08:16.060 P: Your country is an uneducated nincompoop aaannd K: *takes it seriously* 00:08:16.060 --> 00:08:19.320 P: and is no more, cause Trump is President, motherfucker! 00:08:19.560 --> 00:08:20.740 K: How dare you! 00:08:20.740 --> 00:08:21.900 P: *fires machine gun* 00:08:21.900 --> 00:08:24.040 K: Your pimply arse is in jail 00:08:24.040 --> 00:08:27.940 P: You don't know where my pimply arse been. You don't know where my pimply arse been. 00:08:28.020 --> 00:08:30.260 P: Don't yo- Watch your tongue Ken 00:08:30.260 --> 00:08:33.020 P: 'cause your next words might be your last 00:08:33.020 --> 00:08:34.040 K: [inaudible] What else you got? 00:08:34.040 --> 00:08:36.440 P: IIIIIIIINIIIIIIIIIT! *goes wild* 00:08:36.440 --> 00:08:42.180 *hip hop music plays* 00:08:42.440 --> 00:08:47.560 K: Whyyyyyyy!!! Oh Jesus! P: What's fucking right. I don't play around, motherfucker. 00:08:47.560 --> 00:08:48.940 K: [inaudible] I promise 00:08:48.940 --> 00:08:51.020 K: This conversation is silly. 00:08:51.020 --> 00:08:53.860 K: No way, sir! 00:08:54.660 --> 00:08:56.660 K: INIIIIIIT!!! 00:08:56.880 --> 00:09:00.000 P: *gets roasted* Not the innit! Not the innit! 00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:02.840 *sad music plays* 00:09:02.840 --> 00:09:04.520 K: Ah, you lose! 00:09:04.520 --> 00:09:06.560 P: No! K: *laughs victoriously* 00:09:07.860 --> 00:09:10.580 P: No. K: Oh dang! 00:09:10.580 --> 00:09:13.160 P: You think this is over, Ken? 00:09:13.160 --> 00:09:16.440 P: Cinnamon Toast Ken! *sad music still playing* 00:09:18.100 --> 00:09:20.340 P: I don't need a game to roast you. 00:09:20.340 --> 00:09:21.840 P: I'm ready for the real fire. 00:09:22.280 --> 00:09:24.280 P: You got hobbit feet, bitch! 00:09:24.540 --> 00:09:25.500 K: Oh god! Ohh! 00:09:26.240 --> 00:09:31.120 P: That's right. They look like you should change your name...TO FRODO!! 00:09:32.320 --> 00:09:34.560 K: *cries after realizing truth* 00:09:34.560 --> 00:09:36.520 P: That's right, that's right. 00:09:36.720 --> 00:09:38.800 P: No one fucks with Pow-die-pah. 00:09:38.860 --> 00:09:40.980 *Ken's cry turns to burp* 00:09:40.980 --> 00:09:42.900 P: You should delete your computer. 00:09:42.900 --> 00:09:46.240 P: Next time I'll delete your System32, you fuckin' bitch. 00:09:46.240 --> 00:09:48.360 P: I'm never playing this game. Fuck you. 00:09:48.360 --> 00:09:50.400 P: Fuck you. K: *accepts he's a bitch* I'm sorry. I'm sorry. 00:09:50.620 --> 00:09:53.580 P: No. It's too late. It's too late to apologize, Ken. 00:09:54.580 --> 00:09:57.300 K: Wha- what? P: I'm sorry for what I said. 00:09:57.300 --> 00:09:59.340 P: I didn't really mean it. *"It's too late to apologize" song plays* 00:10:00.420 --> 00:10:04.260 P: I hope this video doesn't tear a hole in our friendship. 00:10:04.940 --> 00:10:06.640 K: Ugh. (translate: it did) 00:10:06.640 --> 00:10:09.000 P: I wanna tha- *laughs* I wanna say I'm sorry. 00:10:09.000 --> 00:10:10.460 P: for the hurtful things I said. 00:10:11.140 --> 00:10:12.820 P: especially to you. So, 00:10:12.820 --> 00:10:14.780 P: Your mother does not have eels in her. 00:10:15.360 --> 00:10:16.320 P: I know that. 00:10:16.320 --> 00:10:18.740 K: She juiced them out properly. Thank you. 00:10:18.740 --> 00:10:21.700 K: It's okay. P: Now, don't you have anything to say to me? 00:10:22.280 --> 00:10:24.680 K: Ugh. Okay. Okay. *clears throat* 00:10:25.340 --> 00:10:27.160 K: Your pimply ass P: Yeah 00:10:28.300 --> 00:10:29.700 K: It didn't go to jail. 00:10:29.700 --> 00:10:33.860 *"It's too late to apologize" song plays* 00:10:33.860 --> 00:10:35.860 *Poods is touched* 00:10:35.860 --> 00:10:37.860 SUSYBSCRIBE