PLEASE DIE DIEEEE!
epic warrior scream
I don't know how to spice up these intros anymore.
Hey! How it's going bros, my name is poodiepie
Welcome back to part 3 OH
Im glad you made it back to another one.
Thank you
I feel like I should be kissing your ass a little bit.
Since apparently every god damn Youtuber on the planet is playing this game right now.
So thank you for choosing such an excellent product as the PewDiePie
We all know you are watching the worst one
I don't know honestly
Like why are you here
You should probably just go watch Jacksepticeye
I mean you can watch as well actually
Alright
Uhm
Here we are
In this new area of the house
Very nice
We watch the VHS tape
I'm not watching that shit again.
Did not like that VHS tape
There's a book here
VERY interesting
I'm very- great
Great
fucking great
I don't really see
Oh my god
Jesus fucking Christ
This is creepy
Okay
How about this
BOX!
Fuck you box
Hell yeah
Alright now we can-
Shoot shit
It's really weird for me like everyone keep complaining how shit I was aiming
Alright and how painful it was to watch
But I- But
Ouch
Shut the fuck up
I press the wrong button
I need that shotgun in the hallway
I'm sure there is an obvious way to it
I love how you-
You bros also comment about the flow of logics of the game
Like you lose your hand and then it's just back
Hey a bath
I love baths :D
Who doesn't like to
bathe in...
tar
Great
Someone farted in the bathtub
HEYYYYY
Okay
A wooden statue
It's a disgusting mess of god knows what
Probably Jackscepticeye
Gottem
I cant stop
Its like a Tourette at this point
Its like a tic I mean
Jesus
Have you heard a cling
Hey! An antique coin
So apparently *Jumpscare incoming*
The coins can be used for *3*
Upgrade for guns or some shit like that *2*
Someone commented *1*
AHHHHHH
NOO!
NO!
NO! X2
NO YOU KIDDING ME
FUCK (5) YOU
NO!
FUCK! (6)
GODDAMMIT!
Ew, what is that?
Fuck (7) you!
What is it?
I- I was
taking a shit dude
Fuck (8) you
Hey how about that I can go down
*Manly scream* NOOOOO!
FUUUUUUUUUCK (9)
FUUUUCK (10)
OH GOD I CANT SEE
I CANT SEE
NO!
FUUCK (11)
JESUS
*Scream*
IM FINE
I knew it
Shut the fuck up (12)
I'll never be part of your family
*Mini Jumpscare ahead*
Ah just go, just go
JÄVLA
DONT FUCKING (13) TOUCH ME
YOU FUCKING (14) UGLY SON -
What the hell is wrong with you?
OOHH
Oh I know!
I know
I'll just get the shotgun
Fuck (16) now's not
Im gonna lock myself out
It was a brilliant idea
Oh this is the puzzle I need to solve
Okay
Just need to hide
Apparently he doesnt see me, he's fucking (17) stupid
Madafaka (18)
Why do I have a gun if he doesnt even fucking (19) take damage
Its the demon gone yet?
Alright let's put the
Sa- sa- sa- sa-
Put da- da-
da wooden statue
Excellent
Oh look its a dog :3
Barking at a bird ಠ_ಠ
I think I see it
I think I got it
It is not it?
No that's the- there it is, okay
aline it properly of course
*Bird noises* CAW CAW CAW CAW
Stupid doggo ಠ_ಠ
There you go
There you go and now we can proceed
Thank you very much
Fuck (20) man it's so...
Euughhh
The- ah fuck (21)
Please dont smell it, I mean
I did just fart
Go throught you motherfucker (22)
Go through
Go through faster
Faster
There you go buddy
There you go, we gotta go home
get a snack
Probably go to a doctor and talk about that arm that went away but you know
Everything if fine, everything is great, this is great, I feel great, I feel great, I feel fanta-
Hey it's a moose!
I mean a deer whatever
Shut the fuck (23) up
Alright cool
Oh
BOX!!! ಠ_ಠ
Hell yeah some herbs
Some herbs for that shet
psychostimulants
*Incomprensible swedish swear words*
What was that
Hey beer! :D
Aaand a pizza
And chem fluids
We are looting everything at this point
We need as much fucking (24) health as we can get
Atleast if you aim like a fucking (25) poodiepie
Damn that's a sweet ass
See that's the thing when I-
I swear to god when I zoom in it can does euugghh
So I have like the perfect aim its just-
something wrong with the game
I think we both can agree on that, don't you think?
Than you for one being on my side
Oh yeah, well
Yeah
Gottem
Alright, how do I open these?
I don't understand
how do I open this?
I would shoot it open but I dun wanna
HEEEY ITS A ALBINO MOOSE
hey POODIEPIE
look how happy I am
MMHWAHWA
great I 'll buy the moose
honestly we should go out together sometimes
how f'kin big is this house man
HWUHEHEHHH another antique coin
hey its another BOOOX
excellent
who doesn't love a good box? I DOOOON'T
don't really
alright what do we got here
They look like they may all be victims O,O
aren't we all victims?
OHHHHH MY F'CKIN GOOOD
now i've been some moist places before
but this about TEEEEXAAAAA
OOOOOOOH NOOOOOO
I was actually not gonna go there
R U F"KIN KIDDING ME
R U BEST BE U BEST BE JOKING
YOU BEST BE JOKINGGGGG
FUCKING DIE DEMONN OF HELL
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
DUN WANNA HUG!
RELOAD
IS IT DEAAD?
IT IS NOT DEAD I WOULD HAVE EAT (?)
IT IS NOOOT FUCK YOU
JEESUUUUUS CHRIST JEESUSS
JEEESUUUUUUUUUUUUUS
MOOSE MOOSE DO SOMETHINGGG!
IT'S DEAD IT'S DEAD HELL YEAH MOOSE
YOU MA FUCKING BEST FAVORITE
PWSULPPP
DA FUCK MAN
DAFUQ
JESUS
CHRIST
DAMN U NEED U NEED JESUS
hEY hows THAT A SWEET ASS
THANK YOU ;)
thank you jesus
i mean moose :p
i can't handle this shet like it's too hard for me
i don't
NO NOT ANOTHER ONE
NOT ANOTHER ONE IM GOING NOW FUCK YOU
close the door
i swear 2 god if one of those fuckers spawn right now I can't fucking handle it
GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK ALRIGHT?
we need to release tension alright I need its ARRRGH GOD
look at that *sweet ass* wtf is that
ARRRGH WTF IS THAT
JESUS CHRIST
hey its a scorpion door
let's
let's just cut this scorpions down
SOORRY scorpions
we r the same star side
I'm a scorpion too
So we should work together let's be friends
ARMMM
okay so it's a arrrgh
I'll be back scorpion ;)
I'll I'll I'll be back for you *scorpions; ILOVEEEYOU*
we'll hang out we'll talk
talk about
things
about our genitals THATS
thats a weakness of errrr scorpions
its in the star scientist you think im talking shit?
No i'm
i'm talking
DAA TRUTH
ALRIGHT? we got another door we gonna be RAWHHHHHHHHHH
AHHHHHH
GOT EM
always ready that's me i'm always ready
always an H motherfacker
U DUN FUCK WITH POODS
i dun fuck with you can't jimmy anything
fucking open can I YESHHHHHH
SAAAVEEE STATIONNN
GONNA LOVE MA FUCKING SAVE STATIONNNNNN
did i save it ? no I don't
theres all the book this is gonna be like a lil' aesteric i'm like novels that inspires
Sudden Mystery
Uncover Thrill
HUUUU
I needed to read out a lil bit
can't just keep fucking me game
here we go alright so
we can't really make anything right now can we?
i don't think we need this in the fucking boss
arrrgh we probably gonna find more of those
what do I combine this with
I supposed I don't need shotgun shells
but at the same time FUCK
I I I‘m overthinking it
I might need those
okay here we go
BOI
ARRRGH SHUT THE FUCK UP HOUSE
I don't even have a health pad so I'm like so fucking dead
hello ? HEEEEELLLLLOOOOOOO
heeeellllooooo everyyboooddyyyy
ARRRRGH ITS THE MOIST MONSTER
Fuck man
arrgh he could come out at any point any point the moist monster the monster might be back
alright be the nice moist monster PLEEAASEE
i'm guessing this door is close
Oh its locked okay moist monster
we can be friends ya know
I don't I don't judge based on skin colour
AND yours being ermm
MOIST
OH
ITS DAT A MOIST MONSTER
PLZ DONT PLZ BE GOOD TO ME MOIST MONSTER
allah allah (akhbar) youuu
I don't have much ammo moist monster
I really don't *jumpscare come in 2..*
I really don't *jumpscare come in 1...*
HUEEEEEHHHHHHH * SURPRISEMOTHERFACKER *
ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
HEUUEEHEHEHHERRRR
ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
ERRRRRRRRGGHHHHH
ARRGRGRGRGHHHHHGHGHGHHHGHGGHGH BLUAK
OH you got you juz gonna shoot them in the head
You juz gonna shoot them in the head NUH PROBLEM NO PROBLEM
BRING IT ON i'm soorry moist monster T_T
maybe u want my ass
and I don't mean TUH
honestly juz fuck you okay here we go
HIAWWWWWWK AEEEEEEK HAEEEKKKK
BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRUAK
FUCKYOU FUCK YOU MOIST MONSTER
AHHHH I
HATE YOU
IIII DESPISE YOUUU
LET ME HIT UR FUCKING HEAD
heeeaddd shoooott
JESSUS CHRIST MOIST MONSTER CHRIST
MOTHARFUACKAAAAAAAAR
oh my god it did a backroll
dude that was sick
HIT THEM IN THE HEAD MOTHERFACKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *omg poods*
MOTHERFACKAAAAAAAAA * see what chu hav done moist monster*
I'm really low in health thats fine
thats fine everyone
everyone SHUT THE FXCK UP
shut the f up
I really need a health pad a health pad will be great
okay alright strong chem fluid
does that mean we can YEESSSS YAAAASS
we can make a we can make ARRRGH FACK
OH OH HELLYEAH
just pour that shet on and ahhh
it heals its like holy water
Lucas I caught the guy
LUUUUCAAS I CaUgHt ThE GuY wHo KeEpS TrYin to EscApe
and i dun f'ckin kno and maybe theres a thing
just remember 3 a's and a handprint
you know how to open the door don't you?
3 a's and a handprint
Do what you want with his gal
3 a's and a handprint wha does that mean
Idk what that means yet
I'm sure we will figure it out and I'm sure y'all make fun of me if I don't figure it out
You f'king assh*le
HUUEH
ALRIGHT here we go
TRAWSSS
Lara
HIGH 5
ARHH WILLIAM
Ah we got Shawn
SHAAAAAAWN
we got a no one
hey mr. moist monster I f'king hear you
SHUT THE F UP SHUT THE F UP SHUT THE F UP
i Dun have enough ammo to f*ck with you rite now alright?
So if everyone just chill
we gonna staaart
with the 3 a's alright 3 a's
is the name wif 3 a's in it perhaps
there is not alright then let's try Shawn
Hey Shaaawn
fuck you fuckyou shawn
hey William
eat a dick William
oh alright thats cool
eat a dick
we can make some gun powder
thats pretty cool
I would think that we need to go in to that one
f*ck this place its naaasty
This place is naaaasty than ur mama's assssholee * DAMNDANIEL *
and all the sound like how do i u..
ju..just use the flashlight
Do I not have that anymore?
do i not have that anymore
i dont understand lets uh lets have a look a little bit over here
I don't understand. Let's have a look a lil bit over here
cos i dont think we went here
cause I don't think we went here
HA-HELLLOOO MOIST MONSTERS
hello..hello moist monsters
fuck off fuck off aight
fuck off
alright?
GOT EM
got'em
that's fine that's fine
I'm ready for whatever you guys got for me alright?
fuck you
I don't have alot of ammo alright?
don't fuck with me
Don't got alot ammo
Aw this is bad
I don't like this
Do not like
I don't like this
I need ammo
Alright? I need ammo .
maybe I should just go back ya know
maybe I should just
go back and get the chem fluid
stfu
OKAY
I'm guessing this is locked?
HOLY FUCKING SHIT I unlocked it
Is that a shortcut perhaps
It is
I'm going for it
I'm going back and getting my shet
I know its like UGEHHH
UGEHH HE'S GOIN BACK. Shut the fuck up
sorry I don't mean to be rude
sorry I love you. (we looveee u too poods;3 )
* muack muack*
there you go that was a kiss . Be happy
Okay. Um..
just gonna get the chem fluid
just gonna
Get .. yup .. get
get me that shit
Then we gonna craft we gonna craft some shit
We gonna make some
GUNPOWDER
Now we got alot of fucking shit
And look at that. We saved space
Hey look at that shit
and I wanna do a lil save
Am I a scared lil bitch?
Absolutely
I'm not playing around here I'm not pretending
that I'm something. I'm not. Okay?
I am trying my hardest soul
It's like I would appreciate
a little bit of support
tHaNk YoU
Umm..
No, this is great
Oh I think what's throws me off with the aim is that
I have my mouse on the
Screen
HUEHEHEUHEH
HUEHEHUHEH its almost in the.. You can't see it.
So I-I'm looking at that
Ohh my god
excuses. Yes. shut the fu- Okay.
we unlocked this motherfackerr
Woooo
Wait- where-
where is that
where is the map ? (right there...pooods)
I swear a map popped up ( Hey, Im poppy ) on my fucking screen
There it is . Okay.
FUUUCKKK YOU
BOOOOOXS
THAT'S RIGHT. I don't play around boxes
i don't fucking- This means more monsters is just actually just gonna come
Alright. Bring it. I'm fucking ready
I'm ready for anyone. I'm ready for anything that might come through in my way
I'll take that. Whatever that is. I'll take it
A treasure photo.
I'll treasure it HAHA
HAHA :D
see I do jokes ;)
A scorpion.
Ayeeeeeee!
thats been laying a demon eggs
wow I will eh-
I will cook it with my pappa sauce
I do not have enough space
But that's mkay cuz I can make more of that gun powder
NOOOSH
aiyaiyai
Okay. Alright. That's cool.
hey you know what?
err.. Fuck this
Aw fuck. I can't even fuck em
just like women. (OOOOOOOHHH)
I'm kidding.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
MOIST- MONS- TAR
MOIST MONS- TAAAAAR
DUN TOUCH MEH
DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME *MANLY VOICE*
I can't see you. You're too black -pewdiepie2017
AW SHIT! I NEED TO RELOAD!
FUCK OFF. STAY AWWAAAY STAY AWAYY
JESUS CHRIST. what the- FUCK
GOT EM
GOOOOT EM
GOT EM !
moist monster~
Vaginas in disguisssseee
OH
MOIST MONSTERS
I will lick their thighs (wtf pewds)
thats was pretty good
MOIST MONS-TEWWRS
OKAY I'M OUT. I'M OUT
that was it.
Who's making that noise?
Who's making that noise? Who's making that noise?
Shut the fuck up
I don't need to be here, alright, I- I- I got got other shit to do with my life
This place, I don't, I don't like it
I don't like this place. Don't like it, s'too scary
Too dark, okay, not a fan
I'm just gonna walk really really slow from now on. Make sure...
I.. ighgnkndhg
Alright, alright, alright Okay we're fine
We're fine Everything is fine
I feel great, I feel great
Feel great
Okay just gonna-
Fuck you, fuck you
Fuck you
Oh lord jesus christ
Fuck, I need-
Got 'im
Pehh - guard? Shut the fuck up
Really need a health pack actually
Is that herbs?
No- NO
This is really bad for me
OH MY FUCKING GOD
FUCK YOU FUCK YOU *spit*
Bitch
GOT EM
Let me loot my fuckin' herbs
Yes
YES
Ahhh pour that shit on meeeh
Ahhhhh
*scared voice* Hello?
Hallo?
OHMALORD
I guarded that shit, bitch
Ey, you want to come out and play?
Oh god, oh god
Please don't
I'm really low on, uhm, everything - shit, uh
Plan B
hey hey hey
ai hey hey plat- tch
Hey hey hey
plan–
ahhHH
Arh
ahh
I–
I- I need you t-
i need you to..
i- i need ya to
I need you to fuckin' die.
i need ya to fuckin die
I need you to fucking die
this is–
this is-
This is
Fuck.
Fuck
fuck
There we go, it works
There we go!
THERE we go
It works, it's just a lot fucking harder
it works, it's just a lot fuckin harder
It's just a lot fuckin harder
Okay
okay..
Excellent
excellent
Excellent
fuckin, great.
Fuckin... great
Fucking great
So, I don't have any fuckin ammo left
So, I don't have any fucking ammo left
So I don't have any fucking ammo left
so if everyone can just fucking cool it
so if everyone could just fucking cool it
so if everyone can just fucking cool it
for like 5 FUCKIN MINUTES
for like FIVE FUCKING MINUTES
for like 5 FUCKIN MINUTES!!
That'd be great
That would be great
THAt'd be grEAT
that'd be just–
That'd be just-
That would be just-
Are you FUCKING kidding me??
are you FUCKING kidding me
Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME
There's fucking TWO of them
there's fuckin' TWO OF THEM!
You know what? I- I'm too old for this alright
You know what?
u kno wat
I- I'm too old for this alright
I– I'm too old for this
alright
I don't deserve this,
I don't deserve this
I don't deserve this, I deserve a back massage
I deserve a back massage
At least
at least
At least
at leeasst.
Alright, I'm fuckin out
Alright
I'm fuckin' out. I'm fucking done
I'm fucking out I'm fucking done
I'm fuckin done
I'm fucking done
I'm fucking done, I'm just fucking done
I'm fuckin done
I'm just fucking done :(
I'm just fuckin done
fuckin assholes made this game..
Fuckin assholes made this game
Where th- where the fuck is the way back?
where th–
Where- where the fuck is the way back? I forgot
where the fuck is the way back, I forgot
I forgot
Not in there
not in there
*creepy squelchy sounds*
*creepy ass hissy howl*
Did another one just fucking spawn I swear to fucking god
Did another one just fucking spawn? I swear to fucking god
Did another one just fuckin spawn,
I swear to FUCKING God
I swear to fucking god
I swear to fucking god I'm fucking don-
I swear to fucking god
I'm so fucking done
I'm so fucking done with this game
fuck this, fuck this piece of shit.
Fuck this
*angry poods activated* fuck this fuck this piece of shit
Fuck this piece of shit
fuck you, fuck everyone.
Fuck you fuck everyone
Fuck you, fuck everyone
Fuckin dickholes into my fuckin mouth
Fuckin' dickholes into my fuckin mouth (ok calm down there)
fuckin dickholes
in my fuckin mouth
god fuckin damnit jeeesus fuckin christ
God fuckin dammit, jesus fucking christ
God fucking dammit jesus fucking christ
Gimme a goddamn break alright che-
Gimme a goddamn break, alright, just...
gimme a goddam break
alright, j–
Do I have anything?
I don't have fuck off, I have fuck off
I don't have fuck all, I have fuck all
That's what I have, I have fuck all
that's what I have, I have fuck off
fuck off
Fuck off
Fuck off, honestly
fuck off honestly..
*frustrated sigh*
*inhale, exhale...*
*deep sigh*
God fuckin dammit
godfukendamit
I wanna just cry.
I wanna just cry (aww poods)
I wanna just cry :(
I really- I really just wanna give it a good cry
I really
I really just wanna give it a good cri.
Alright well I got the fuckin' scorpion thing
Alright well I got the fuckin scorpion thing
so maybe I'm just supposed to put that fuckin thing there
so maybe I'm just supposed to put that fucking thing there and see what happens
so maybe I'm just supposed to put that fucking thing there
and see what happens alright
and see what happens
Alright?
alright?
see, you know, maybe there's some fucking ammo in here
See, y'know, maybe there's some fucking ammo in here
See you know maybe there's some fuckin ammo in here
Who fucking knows I don't-
who fuckin knows
I don't–
H- hi everybody! Ayyy
HI everybody eyy
Hi, everybody!
eyyyy
oh, great. We're just back here
Oh, great, we're just back here
Excellent, that's
excellent, that's..
Excellent that's-
that's really what I..
that's really what I... just fuckin hoped for (not)
That's really what I... just fucking hope for
just fuckin hoped for
I need to get that shotgun.
I need to get that shotgun
I need to get that shotgun I need it fucking bad alright
I need it fucking bad, alright
*groan in background*
Are you FUCKING KIDDDIng me
Are you fucking kidding me!?
are u FUCKING KIDDING ME
*creepy laugh*
nngh
N-
N-... you f-
you f–
You've-
No.. no...
No
noooo
no
No I'm done I'm so fucking done right now
I am.. done
I'mmm done.
I am so fucking done right now
I am so fuckin done right now
you have no fuckin idea how done I am right now
You have no fucking idea how done I am right now
Don't underestimate how fucking done I am
don't underestimate how fuckin done I am
ueyyeagghh thi–
Ye- the- this fucking sucks major fucking dicks, alright
this fuckin sucks major fuckin dicks
alright?
great, shotgun shells
Great, shotgun shells
Great, shotgun shelf
JUST WHAT I NEEDED /s
JUST WHAT I NEEDED!!
JUST WHAT I NEEDED
stfu moose
Shut the fuck up moose
stfu moose
y'all suck a dick.
Y'all fuck a dick
Y'all suck a dick
everyone suck a dick.
Everyone suck a dick
what is this, a crow?
What is this? A crow?
What is this, a crow?
Fuckin lame
fuckin lame
(oO lasagne??)
just fuckin gimme a slice of pizza
Just fuckin gimme a slice of pizza right now That's all I fuckin want
Just fucking give me a slice of pizza right now
that's all I fuckin want
That's all I fucking want - a slice of pizza
A slice of pizza
...a slice of pizza
I need a fucking break,
I need a fucking break alright
I need a fucking break, alright
I need a fucking break
alright I need a fucking break
I need a fucking break
I can't fucking do this :(
I can't fucking do this
I can't fuckin do this
I can't, I just fuckin can't
I can't, I just fucking can't
Alright
alright
Alright?
This is not cool
this is not cool
I-
I...
I–
eeEGh
Iiiii- how, how, how, how have I made a living playing all fucking horror games?
ueeahheu
how
how how how howww
hOW
how have i made a living playing off fire- fucking horror games
have I made a living
playing off fucking horror games..?
and I cant even fuckin play this fuckin game
I mean I can't even fucking play this fucking game
I swear to fuckin god
I swear to fucking god
I swear to fucking god, I don't
I don't...
I don't-
I genuinely don't
I genuinely don't-
wanna play
-wanna play and not because I don't like the game because I just...
wanna play
and not because I don't like the game
and not because I don't like the game, because I just...
I got this fuckin chest pain
I got this fucking chest pain
Some ammo, would just be so nice,
Some ammo would just be SO nice
It would just be so great ya know
it would just be so great
it would just be so great, y'know
u kno
It would just make fucking everything a just- slightly less shit right now
it would just
fucking make everything just slightly less shit right now?
a just slightly less shit right now
I suppose we will go down to the hell hole, as I like to call it
Supposed we will go down to the hell hole as I'd like to call it
I suppose we will go down to the hell hole as I like to call it
also Jacksepticeye's asshole
also JackSepticEye's asshole
also Jacksepticeye's asshole
I'm kidding, sorry Jack, I love you,
I'm kidding! Sorry Jack, I love you, you know that
I love you you know that
you know that
I- I just like sense of creative humour right?
I– I just lack sense of creative humor, alright?
I just lack sense of creative hur-humor alright
It's nothing
It's nothing c:
Nothing e-else than that
nothing else than that (sure poods)
nothing I– else than that
Now...
Now,
we're gonna use a new tactic now
which I uh I..
which I- i, i.. I've invented
which i- le em i i i've invented completely by myself
euh I've invented
completely by myself
and it's called
and it's called fucking JUST RUN and gun
and its called, "Fuckin just run... and gun"
fucking
just run
and gun
actually no gun because I don't have a fucking gun
Actually no gun because I don't have a fucking gun
actually, don't gun because I don't have a fuckin gun
Can we make-
mm can we make–
Can we ma...
We don't have any fucking gun powder
we don't have any fucking gunpowder
We don't have any fucking gun powder
ALright just fuckin YOLO
Alright
alright just fuckin yolo
Just fucking YOLO, we're just gonna fucking YOLO
We're just gonna fuckin YOLO
We're just gonna fuckin yolo
We're just g- we're just gonna fuckin YOLO
We're just, we're just gonna fucking YOLO
We're just– we're just gonna fuckin yolo
*machine starts up*
It's cool
That's cool
its cool
I'm literally supposed to have the shotgun at this point
I'M LITERALLY SUPposed to have the fucking shotgun at this point
I'm literally supposed to have the shotgun at this point
It's so fucking obvious
Hey buddy how you doin?
Hey buddy, how ya doin
Hey buddy (you in london) how are you doing?
Hey
hey..
You in London?
u in London?
You know, I'm really–
You know I'm really- this, the, uh
this f–
This- thi- UGH- this is- this is a bonding-
thi– uahh–
this is a–
This is, this is bonding This is a bonding moment
this is a bonding–
This is a bonding moment
this is a bonding moment
aw fuck i'm fuckin trapped
Ah fuck, I'm fucking trapped
ah FUCK I'm fucking trapped
omg I made it out
omg I made it out..
Oh my god I made it out
idk fucking how I did that
I dunno fuckin how I did that
I dunno fucking how I did that
I need that fucking shotgun so fucking bad
I need that fuckin shotgun so fuckin bad
I need it so fuckin bad
I need it so fucking bad
I'm just gonna...
I'm just gonna-
I'm just gonna–
Shut the fuck up, everyone, shut the fuck up
STFU everyone stfu
stfu, everyone
stfu
ok
Okay, so
so
It seems that I am actually
it seems that I am actually
now that I have the scorpion key
now that I have scorpion key
now- now that we got the fucking scorpion key or whatever
now– now that we got the–
now, now that we got the fucking scorpion key or whatever
fuckin scorpio key or whatever..
we can actually get the shotgun
you can't get it before you have the scorpion key
you can't get it before you have the scorpion key?
So i'm just gonna take that jolly ol-
So, I'm just gonna take that
jolly old
god- good ol- good ol advice
gooieuh–
good old, good old advice!
and euh, we're just gonna pop up
and ahhh we're just gonna pop up
and ahh get the fucking shotgun
and uh get the fuckin shotgun
cos I need– I need a shotgun
cause i need- i need a shotgun
and I need some..
men– mental support.
men- ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
- mental support alright and some verbal support
alright
some verbal
euh
support
maybe– hey,
maybe hey-
hey pewds
i know youre not that great at this game but
hey at least youre playing it, alright?
hey at least you're playing it alright
fuuuck me..
fuck me in the fucking asshole
fuckin asshole, I–
It's been a long time since I been, this fuckin on edge.
since I've been this fucking on edge
idk wtf it is
i dunno what the fuck it is
It's not even that scary
it's not even that scary
like yoooure just fucking shooting monsters like big deal
like yooUOou just fucking shooting monsters like big deal
eeuhhe aaihai
eeUUuGHhaAAH I don't
I don't
I aaGHh I can't fucking explain it
aahiahai
I can't fuckin explain it
its..
I'm fuckin well immersed in this fucking game right now
I'm well-immersed in this fucking game right now
I hope it doesn't fucking stay like this
I hope it doesn't fuckin stay like this
I really don't...
I really don't
alright so this motherfucker
I swear to fucking god,
I swear to fucking god
you should fucking suck a d–
You should fucking suck a big dick
..big dick.
I'm carrying too much stuff anyway I gotta go back
I'm carrying too much stuff anyway
I gotta go back
FUCK sorry
fuck.
sorry.
It's very good level design
I got... like..
the way they done the hubs or whatever
it's kind of..
kind cool
I would say
ok lets look at this fuckin treasure photo by the way
she hid something nice in the...
furnace
okay well..
we'll– we'll keep an eye out for that
euhhh
meanwhile, we'll fuckin, eehhh
put you away
I dunno, maybe, we..
euuhhhHH I don't know
do we need that? I don't think so
"Living room", written on it..
i guess we're going there now so,
"See where items are for a limited time!!"
Maybe I'm supposed to save them for like this important fuckin thing i don't–
Oh that's cool! :D
so there's....
are you fuckin suckin a dick, right now.
great.
can you put on a fuckin shirt, at least
is he just gonna..
just fuckin chase m–
aw fuck.
You fucking dickhole!
ok I get it.
You don't like me, I don't like you either
alright..
trust me, it's–
it's fucking mutual
no, use it!
go go go gO GO!!!
please, for the love of dicks
there must be a way out
there's definitely a way out
don't– don't listen to him Felix
you're fine, look
theres– theres flowers
oh look, so nice!
Oh!
is the bad man gone yet?
Ok, I'm gonna assume he is...
....
Alright...
There it is! The broken shotgun
Nice!
FUCKING nice
YES
HAIIPOODI-
Shut the fuck up.
Handgun ammo
Fuck... He's still here
You best be jokin'...
I need that handgun ammo
What can I drop here?
What does he mean by "family"?
AHH feel much better now!
Hey moose how you doin'?
Eyy
Oh god...
Just go, just go, just go
You got this Pewds You fucking got this
You're da man Pewds
You da fuckin man
You da fucking boy Hey boy it's your boy P to the Pie
"You can't take shutgun because you have too many items"
Fuck off
Fuck....?
Can I drop this for a second?
Are you fucking keelin me?
Kidding me
You fucking moron
Alright
Sorry, sorry I'll just have to go
There you go buddy! You happy now?
*singing* Everybody is happy
I'VEGOTASHOTGUN
Happy happy happy
Got a fucking shotgun
Who the fuck is ready for this fucking shit
You b- Oh, I got to reload
That would have been embarrassing
*out of game* Is that cop..... sirens?
Oh it's not in the game, taha I was like, what?
They're coming for me, boys
I'm done
Now let's do a nice nice fucking save there
Nicest fucking save of the fucking century
God fucking dammit
Fucking how long have I been- 42 minutes
I know it's cut down for you but jee, I..
I'm really genuinely struggling here, okay?
*deep breath*
I can do it, I can do it
I know I can
Alright, we're fine, we're fine
We're fine I can play a little bit more
Little bit more, just a little bit more
It's like the end of- end of the session You got this
Just gotta fuckin
Kill these fuckin...
moist looking motherfucking monsters
and then lick their puss-
Sorry, no, I am... nervous
Wait this is not where I'm supposed to go
Meh. If you think I have bad sense of direction
then
You are right You're actually absolutely right
Ironically there's baths and showers here in the most disgusting fucking place in the game
Alright boys!
Bring em up! Bring em up!
I'm done with you, you.. I'm done I'm fucking done
Alright?
I'm fucking done
I'M FUCKING DONE!
YOU WANNA SUCK MY...?
Then come and get it boys!
*bang* Come and get it boys!