WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: zh-TW

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不有趣

00:00:14.300 --> 00:00:15.300
不,謝謝

00:00:17.880 --> 00:00:18.380
蛤?

00:00:18.960 --> 00:00:19.460
喔喔!?

00:00:19.700 --> 00:00:20.400
喔喔!?

00:00:21.200 --> 00:00:22.200
這是什麼?

00:00:22.700 --> 00:00:27.700
五歲小孩威脅YOUTUBE王者Pewdiepie退出?

00:00:27.700 --> 00:00:31.759
踩過我天殺的屍體!!

00:00:32.200 --> 00:00:34.700
踩過我的素食屍-----!!!

00:00:34.700 --> 00:00:35.720
這怎麼能夠?

00:00:35.980 --> 00:00:37.180
Jefferson Graham(記者)

00:00:37.300 --> 00:00:38.000
蛤?

00:00:38.100 --> 00:00:38.600
ok.

00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:39.700
好吧..

00:00:40.320 --> 00:00:41.200
Jefferson Graham

00:00:41.680 --> 00:00:43.620
五歲小孩威脅...

00:00:43.620 --> 00:00:44.120
噗!

00:00:44.120 --> 00:00:46.199
也許這個小鬼...有兩把刷子

00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:47.200
我是誰?

00:00:47.280 --> 00:00:48.640
下一個Pewdiepie?

00:00:48.980 --> 00:00:49.480
讓我們..

00:00:49.980 --> 00:00:51.379
讓我們來看一些內容

00:00:51.760 --> 00:00:53.760
*女聲:快快快快~快去床上!快去床上*

00:00:54.200 --> 00:00:54.700
*快樂的音樂*

00:00:57.600 --> 00:00:59.100
*好了,接著刷你的牙*

00:00:59.780 --> 00:01:02.180
*Ryan要去洗澡了*

00:01:02.180 --> 00:01:03.540
他有三輪車,我愛這個

00:01:03.540 --> 00:01:04.900
*Ryan:歡迎來到Ryan的玩具評論*

00:01:06.420 --> 00:01:08.260
幹!我沒有開場動畫

00:01:08.380 --> 00:01:08.920
狗屎!

00:01:08.920 --> 00:01:10.300
讓我現在做一個

00:01:11.460 --> 00:01:14.580
*裝小孩聲音*:歡迎來到Felix的玩具評論
(註:Felix是Pewds的本名)

00:01:14.680 --> 00:01:16.400
這真的有抓到重點嗎?

00:01:17.940 --> 00:01:19.500
看五歲小孩玩得很開心?

00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:23.440
(讀評論)看一些影片,他們會提醒你做的某些影片

00:01:23.440 --> 00:01:24.179
(笑)

00:01:24.420 --> 00:01:26.160
這就是我想看的

00:01:26.540 --> 00:01:29.000
我是說,我為何需要查看我做的影片

00:01:29.600 --> 00:01:31.380
當我可以只看別人所做一樣的屎?

00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:32.660
這真的...

00:01:32.700 --> 00:01:33.320
(笑)

00:01:33.360 --> 00:01:34.300
這真的有品質保證

00:01:34.520 --> 00:01:35.740
喔靠...我的老天...

00:01:35.860 --> 00:01:37.520
我變成剛剛說情況的其中一個

00:01:37.520 --> 00:01:40.679
"為何你會看別人玩電玩
其實你可以自己玩?"

00:01:40.940 --> 00:01:41.940
(笑)

00:01:43.240 --> 00:01:43.800
賽啦...

00:01:44.600 --> 00:01:47.380
Youtube中最有名的巨星是一個五歲小孩

00:01:47.380 --> 00:01:48.800
給我等等!!

00:01:48.800 --> 00:01:49.180
The Verge也說很好!?
(註:The Verge應該是某種新型態的媒體)

00:01:49.180 --> 00:01:50.360
他媽的發生什麼事?!

00:01:50.740 --> 00:01:52.800
我們是在說同一個the Verge嗎?

00:01:52.800 --> 00:01:55.300
The Verge會找出任何可以的機會

00:01:55.300 --> 00:01:56.340
來吐槽我?

00:01:56.340 --> 00:01:58.160
喔,OK,這很有趣

00:01:58.160 --> 00:02:02.500
(讀報導)Pewdiepie跟其他人,
跟華納兄弟拿錢,來說些遊戲的正面評價

00:02:02.640 --> 00:02:04.800
一個被我揭穿的謊言

00:02:07.300 --> 00:02:08.390
去你的!

00:02:08.390 --> 00:02:10.579
(讀報導)在過去的18周裡"Ryan Toys Review"

00:02:10.580 --> 00:02:12.560
曾是youtube上最受歡迎的頻道

00:02:13.460 --> 00:02:15.640
有史以來最年輕的YOUTUBE巨星

00:02:15.640 --> 00:02:17.480
這是...我們該慶祝這件事嗎?

00:02:17.560 --> 00:02:19.660
我們該慶祝這件事嗎?...事實是...

00:02:19.720 --> 00:02:21.240
這個媽媽就像..

00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.140
你想他會靠這個賺很多錢?

00:02:24.320 --> 00:02:26.140
你以為他會得到這些玩具?

00:02:26.140 --> 00:02:28.859
我也很喜歡他們連結每個影片的方式

00:02:29.800 --> 00:02:30.600
在他們的描述中

00:02:30.820 --> 00:02:32.500
我真的很欣賞

00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:35.340
(讀報導)有一天當孩子變成主持人

00:02:35.560 --> 00:02:37.240
那孩子不是主持人

00:02:37.240 --> 00:02:39.920
OK,我們來看個影片,我會告訴你我是什麼意思

00:02:40.400 --> 00:02:41.700
*女聲:耶~太好了~*

00:02:41.700 --> 00:02:43.619
*Ryan:我們會得到什麼?*

00:02:43.840 --> 00:02:45.360
*女聲:我不知道~*

00:02:45.660 --> 00:02:47.460
*女聲:哪一個才是你想孵化的?*

00:02:48.280 --> 00:02:50.240
看到了嗎?她甚至不想讓他完成

00:02:50.240 --> 00:02:52.200
他很明確地說了些什麼!

00:02:52.380 --> 00:02:53.820
*女聲:哪一個才是你想孵化的?*

00:02:53.940 --> 00:02:54.740
看看他

00:02:54.840 --> 00:02:55.800
*女人說話*

00:02:55.860 --> 00:02:58.300
不,你不在乎但是我在乎!!!

00:02:58.300 --> 00:03:00.160
他媽的給我閉嘴Ryan!!!!

00:03:00.160 --> 00:03:02.960
*Ryan: 這些看起來好像打開了*

00:03:02.980 --> 00:03:05.619
*Ryan: 你還可以聽到裡面有些雜音*

00:03:05.620 --> 00:03:06.580
*女聲:對呀*

00:03:06.580 --> 00:03:07.820
我的天啊  我想他...

00:03:07.820 --> 00:03:11.780
我想他自己想到這些句子,
而且沒人告訴他該說什麼

00:03:11.780 --> 00:03:14.360
*Ryan: 你還可以聽到裡面有些雜音*

00:03:14.360 --> 00:03:15.360
*女聲:對呀*

00:03:15.360 --> 00:03:16.520
(尷尬症犯了)

00:03:16.660 --> 00:03:17.940
我不....喜歡....

00:03:18.800 --> 00:03:19.220
我確定他愛這樣

00:03:19.220 --> 00:03:19.720
你知道的

00:03:19.720 --> 00:03:20.220
我確定

00:03:20.220 --> 00:03:21.840
我會愛這樣...當我還是個孩子...

00:03:21.860 --> 00:03:23.300
去打開一堆玩具

00:03:23.300 --> 00:03:25.600
但在此同時,這就像...

00:03:26.160 --> 00:03:28.280
有些東西被關起來了

00:03:28.340 --> 00:03:30.980
這有點像 在電視上看童星

00:03:30.980 --> 00:03:34.720
因為你知道他們的父母
正在強迫他們這麼做

00:03:34.720 --> 00:03:36.660
而這是有點悲傷的

00:03:36.660 --> 00:03:38.799
我情不自禁的感受到同樣的氛圍

00:03:38.980 --> 00:03:40.920
很明顯的,我不知道發生什麼事

00:03:42.600 --> 00:03:43.700
但我看了影片,感覺到"呃--------!"

00:03:43.820 --> 00:03:46.680
(讀報導)日復一日,Ryan就像在讀劇本一樣

00:03:46.860 --> 00:03:47.540
(笑)

00:03:47.600 --> 00:03:48.100
不

00:03:48.100 --> 00:03:50.100
這劇本是媽媽說:

00:03:50.100 --> 00:03:51.620
"嘿,你他媽給我說這個"

00:03:51.680 --> 00:03:53.440
(讀報導)youtube巨星們正在推動零售的銷售模式

00:03:53.440 --> 00:03:54.800
我無法為此爭辯

00:03:55.240 --> 00:03:58.200
潛意識廣告是最好的

00:03:58.500 --> 00:04:00.200
贊助單元

00:04:00.200 --> 00:04:00.560
對

00:04:00.560 --> 00:04:01.220
這很明顯

00:04:01.220 --> 00:04:02.740
他們是被沃爾瑪(零售百貨)所贊助

00:04:02.960 --> 00:04:03.860
百分之百

00:04:03.940 --> 00:04:04.820
這太明顯了

00:04:04.820 --> 00:04:05.320
就像...

00:04:05.320 --> 00:04:07.359
看這個影片就像

00:04:07.620 --> 00:04:09.720
我們得到了獨家的沃爾瑪蛋!

00:04:09.880 --> 00:04:13.680
*女聲:而我們甚至也找到了沃爾瑪獨家販售的版本!*

00:04:13.800 --> 00:04:14.720
嗚--------------!

00:04:14.720 --> 00:04:16.980
為何會有任何一個孩子會在乎這件事情?

00:04:17.100 --> 00:04:18.120
跟我解釋一下

00:04:18.260 --> 00:04:18.760
OK?

00:04:18.760 --> 00:04:21.620
為何會有孩子在意這是不是沃爾瑪限定版本?

00:04:21.620 --> 00:04:22.860
這根本完全沒有道理

00:04:22.860 --> 00:04:29.220
然後你得到一個評論說
"他向華納兄弟拿錢說一些對遊戲的正面評論"即使他沒有

00:04:29.320 --> 00:04:31.440
談論有關紕漏不適當的事,蛤?

00:04:31.640 --> 00:04:33.159
OK,這在哪裡?

00:04:33.160 --> 00:04:36.600
Ryan的成功換句話說,可以賺取很多錢財

00:04:36.660 --> 00:04:37.680
給他的父母!!

00:04:37.780 --> 00:04:39.400
喔,為了更大的公司

00:04:39.400 --> 00:04:40.800
ok,ok,好吧

00:04:40.800 --> 00:04:42.680
所以基本上來說,這是個法律漏洞

00:04:42.820 --> 00:04:46.920
一個普通的孩子沒辦法

00:04:46.920 --> 00:04:49.100
為了商業化變得滑稽

00:04:49.100 --> 00:04:52.520
許多州對於孩子的演出無法可管

00:04:53.160 --> 00:04:56.520
他們沒有關於孩子演出所延伸的童工法

00:04:56.720 --> 00:05:00.320
這個頻道不再只是Ryan玩著他的玩具

00:05:00.320 --> 00:05:06.380
無論他是要去迪士尼樂園、剪新髮型、還是發燒,
他的父母才是決定透露多少的人....

00:05:07.640 --> 00:05:09.620
你懂我在說什麼嗎?

00:05:09.660 --> 00:05:13.820
你有沒有看過一個影片有1100萬觀看次數,
加上9000個讚?

00:05:15.200 --> 00:05:18.240
請告訴我那個影片,因為那並不存在

00:05:18.240 --> 00:05:21.320
那些都不是真的人,也不是真的觀看次數

00:05:21.320 --> 00:05:23.800
這只有1000個留言回應

00:05:23.800 --> 00:05:25.300
看看我有1100萬觀看次數的影片

00:05:28.280 --> 00:05:29.799
我得到22,000的回應

00:05:30.700 --> 00:05:32.960
22,000                 1000

00:05:34.140 --> 00:05:36.860
最多觀看次數的影片有6億次點閱

00:05:37.340 --> 00:05:38.640
這     三     小

00:05:39.400 --> 00:05:42.000
這是-不好意思  這真的是他媽的三小

00:05:42.200 --> 00:05:42.979
這三小

00:05:42.980 --> 00:05:44.860
這比Call me Maybe的一半還多

00:05:44.860 --> 00:05:49.520
你是在說--這世上的每個人都應該知道這小孩是誰?

00:05:49.520 --> 00:05:53.320
我賭大部分看過這個影片的都他媽的沒有腦

00:05:53.320 --> 00:05:55.599
你是怎麼得到這一堆觀看次數?

00:05:56.640 --> 00:05:57.760
要如何才能讓the Verge

00:06:00.200 --> 00:06:01.580
還有 USA Today

00:06:01.680 --> 00:06:06.000
失敗的詮釋它?他們怎麼能上到封面?

00:06:06.220 --> 00:06:07.800
而沒有提到它?

00:06:08.400 --> 00:06:11.160
你知道,我並不是在批判這個家庭

00:06:11.160 --> 00:06:13.540
我不在乎,我真的不在乎

00:06:13.540 --> 00:06:16.700
像是,做任何你想做的,別誤會我,這不是重點

00:06:17.260 --> 00:06:21.920
重點是"我想做的,我絕對會他媽的嚇死你們"

00:06:23.000 --> 00:06:30.140
這兩大網路媒體,The Verge跟USA Today

00:06:30.160 --> 00:06:33.600
像是,這是三小-
看看這個,看看這個

00:06:35.340 --> 00:06:36.619
這是他媽的特徵

00:06:36.620 --> 00:06:40.280
我們來看看,也許這個"bot"曾在哪裡提到?
不

00:06:40.540 --> 00:06:42.700
假的觀看次數?不

00:06:42.960 --> 00:06:47.260
這整個文章,都沒有

00:06:47.580 --> 00:06:50.659
所以恭喜,你付錢買了觀看次數

00:06:51.220 --> 00:06:55.460
然後你得到這個標題
"喔!他打敗Pewdiepie了"

00:06:55.460 --> 00:07:00.580
而我想這就是讓我很火大的原因，
因為人們總是想要他媽的讓我崩潰

00:07:00.580 --> 00:07:04.620
你怎麼能稱自己為記者並犯下這個他媽的錯誤?

00:07:05.000 --> 00:07:07.480
你怎能他媽的這麼遲緩?

00:07:09.180 --> 00:07:11.900
你該做的就是他媽的滾動頁面

00:07:15.400 --> 00:07:17.920
你真的太笨了,我他媽的恨這個媒體

00:07:19.120 --> 00:07:21.400
這真的他媽的很尷尬

00:07:23.520 --> 00:07:25.680
歡迎來到Felix的玩具評論

00:07:26.860 --> 00:07:27.820
*裝成可愛寶寶*

00:07:27.820 --> 00:07:30.480
(攝影師)好了寶寶Felix你可以再做一次嗎?

00:07:30.640 --> 00:07:32.400
(攝影師)再多一點活力!!

00:07:32.400 --> 00:07:34.799
(攝影師)ok,媽媽需要一些錢

00:07:35.720 --> 00:07:36.700
再多一點活力?

00:07:36.700 --> 00:07:38.440
(攝影師)媽媽需要錢,OK?

00:07:38.840 --> 00:07:43.799
(攝影師)嗯,你可以再做一次嗎?更有活力一點

00:07:43.900 --> 00:07:44.780
再多一點活力?

00:07:44.780 --> 00:07:46.799
(攝影師)嘿這裡有Red Bull(能量飲料)

00:07:46.800 --> 00:07:50.120
(攝影師)ok?媽咪需要一些錢所以你必須看起來開心

00:07:50.240 --> 00:07:52.960
(攝影師)這就對了,把它喝完

00:07:52.960 --> 00:07:54.500
(攝影師)好了

00:07:54.500 --> 00:07:55.960
這太冰了我沒辦法喝

00:07:55.960 --> 00:07:57.979
(攝影師)再來一次,但要開心點

00:07:59.660 --> 00:08:01.200
啊~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

00:08:01.760 --> 00:08:03.390
(攝影師)很好

00:08:04.680 --> 00:08:06.680
Furby是我最愛的玩具

00:08:06.680 --> 00:08:08.740
(攝影師)ok,媽咪買給你

00:08:09.100 --> 00:08:09.740
耶~~

00:08:09.740 --> 00:08:10.380
(攝影師)耶~~

00:08:10.380 --> 00:08:10.880
耶~~

00:08:10.880 --> 00:08:12.260
(攝影師)耶,你興奮嗎?

00:08:12.440 --> 00:08:13.219
耶!

00:08:13.220 --> 00:08:13.960
(攝影師)ok!

00:08:14.120 --> 00:08:15.720
我的天啊,這是-

00:08:15.720 --> 00:08:18.560
(攝影師)不要毀了盒子!媽咪需要把它恢復原樣

00:08:18.560 --> 00:08:19.840
我不會玩

00:08:19.840 --> 00:08:21.280
(攝影師)你不需要懂它,不

00:08:21.280 --> 00:08:22.900
(攝影師)媽咪需要新的指甲

00:08:22.900 --> 00:08:25.120
(攝影師)ok,打開它,這是刀子

00:08:25.120 --> 00:08:27.460
(攝影師)給我8歲的孩子

00:08:28.420 --> 00:08:29.140
來吧

00:08:30.180 --> 00:08:31.540
(攝影師)哇~~~

00:08:32.120 --> 00:08:33.460
哇~~~~

00:08:33.820 --> 00:08:34.940
喔~~

00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:37.800
這太可愛了!

00:08:37.800 --> 00:08:38.840
(攝影師)秀給鏡頭看

00:08:39.179 --> 00:08:40.760
這真是太-這真是太可愛了

00:08:40.760 --> 00:08:41.720
(攝影師)再多一點活力

00:08:41.880 --> 00:08:44.360
喔喔喔~~敲口ㄞ~~

00:08:44.440 --> 00:08:45.820
啊啊啊啊啊

00:08:45.940 --> 00:08:47.300
但媽咪這是粉紅的

00:08:48.280 --> 00:08:49.420
我想要藍色的

00:08:50.600 --> 00:08:51.540
啊啊啊啊---------!

00:08:51.580 --> 00:08:54.680
這是當它睡著時用的面罩

00:08:54.680 --> 00:08:57.000
(攝影師)哇!是不是很棒呀!

00:08:57.860 --> 00:08:59.560
啊啊啊啊啊啊

00:09:00.600 --> 00:09:01.380
喔------!

00:09:03.420 --> 00:09:06.540
Furby: 我好奇我今晚會做什麼夢

00:09:10.560 --> 00:09:11.260
你看到了嗎?

00:09:12.660 --> 00:09:15.380
(攝影師)媽咪希望你燒了它

00:09:21.680 --> 00:09:24.790
媽咪我不想要,它是我朋友

00:09:24.800 --> 00:09:25.340
(攝影師)殺了你朋友

00:09:25.500 --> 00:09:27.980
但它是我朋友,是Fuzzball先生

00:09:27.980 --> 00:09:30.940
(攝影師)殺了你愛的人,是你成為男人的唯一道路

00:09:30.940 --> 00:09:32.440
這也發生在爸爸身上嗎?

00:09:32.680 --> 00:09:33.819
Furby:對~~

00:09:38.960 --> 00:09:40.400
(攝影師)殺了它!

00:09:42.500 --> 00:09:43.000
喔!!

00:09:45.780 --> 00:09:46.280
啊啊---!!

00:09:51.220 --> 00:09:54.580
(攝影師)ok,你怎麼看待你的新玩具?

00:09:55.180 --> 00:09:57.200
為何你要讓我殺它?

00:09:57.200 --> 00:09:59.180
(攝影師)你有跟你的新玩具玩得開心嗎?

00:09:59.180 --> 00:10:02.160
它本來是我唯一的朋友,我們本來想離開這座城

00:10:02.160 --> 00:10:06.620
它曾經是我的全部,我們本來想跨過那座山去見海

00:10:06.620 --> 00:10:08.480
還有去見見那片天空

00:10:09.500 --> 00:10:12.220
我曾經愛它,我用我全部的心力愛著它

00:10:12.240 --> 00:10:13.840
然後你讓我殺了它

00:10:15.820 --> 00:10:18.380
(攝影師)等等!!你要做什麼?

00:10:19.760 --> 00:10:22.319
你有看過"熱刀子"挑戰嗎?

00:10:22.400 --> 00:10:24.160
(攝影師)寶貝停下來!!

00:10:24.160 --> 00:10:27.540
你有看過"熱刀子"嗎?如何切過所有的東西?

00:10:27.540 --> 00:10:28.640
(攝影師)寶貝不!!!!!!!!!

00:10:29.100 --> 00:10:30.900
啊啊啊啊啊啊啊

00:10:30.940 --> 00:10:32.860
*Pewds的吼叫*

00:10:35.800 --> 00:10:38.760
我生活在沒有框架的世界30分鐘

00:10:38.760 --> 00:10:41.760
我活了下來,謝謝Fuzzball先生的知識

00:10:41.760 --> 00:10:44.260
但在30分鐘之後,這全部改變了

00:10:44.400 --> 00:10:46.540
全部的東西都變了

00:11:06.900 --> 00:11:11.380
我希望你喜歡這個影片,如果你喜歡,
也看看另外一個吧!

00:11:11.380 --> 00:11:14.640
就在這裡,也是有關類似的話題

00:11:14.640 --> 00:11:17.939
我想你可能-如果你喜歡這個,你應該也會喜歡另一個

00:11:18.800 --> 00:11:22.819
太棒了,繼續收看,
感謝你的收看(模仿Mazia的片尾)

00:11:22.820 --> 00:11:28.159
另外也請記得點擊"提醒符號"(鈴鐺符號),
我需要買鈴鐺或一些屎,會讓我很酷