WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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The Game Awards—what generally has been referred to as:

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The Cringe Awards.

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H A H A

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I don't really get why.

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Not everything is cringe, okay?

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As to the front of the stage rework hydrobot. Can I?

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Ow.

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This year!

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2017 Game Awards—a disappointing amount of cringe.

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(I'm x20)

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I'm letdown. What happened? What went wrong?

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This year, just felt more like the Ad Awards 2017

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(exasperated laugh)

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Cause my god. There was more ads,

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than a PewDiePie ten minute video

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That's a lot of ads boy

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Alright the sales going on tonight are gonna give you special discounts on the best games.

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But this year we're going next level by partnering with eBay: 50% off a HyperX headset

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But now it's time for the final offer: a brand new 34 inch LG widescreen monitor for almost half off.

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(burst of laughter)

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But let's review this year!

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As people online are always like

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You didn't present every award, and it's like I don't think we ever really want to present like every individual genre award

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But we want to create different kinds of awards— elevate the genre  by coming up with new awards such great new award titles as

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Elevate the genre by coming up with new awards.

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Such great new award titles as,

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Most Anticipated Game Presented by McCafe. Truly an award to be proud of—what did you win?

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Most anticipated game by McCafe. We'll be right back after this

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We'll be right back after this

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McDonald's congratulates all the nominees—

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Jesus Christ, can you imagine the Oscars?

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Having Most Anticipated Movie Award

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(chuckles)

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What a great idea

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(pls no demonitization) THE OSCARS! (shh) YOU!

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Hey hey, I'm sorry. I was just kidding! It was a joke, it was a joke and this shows that the gaming industry

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built so much on just hype in my opinion. How many times have you been let down

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by the release of a game, come on.

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We're on every platform out there tonight. We're on Facebook, we're on YouTube and 4k,

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PlayStation, Steam,

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GameSpot, IGN, Xbox, and we're also streaming on—Mountain Dew

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Hey look it's another zombie game everybody.

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Oh wow, that's—that's really fun...

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original and exciting. I really enjoy myself a good old zombie game

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"What zombie game are they gonna make next?" I always ask myself when I wake up.

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If the game doesn't have zombies, then why bother?

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the game is...

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—zombies—if it's not—zombies—why bother

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And right now, it's my honor to announce the first Award winner of the night for Trending Gamer

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Moonlight: Best Picture

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Trending gamer is Dr. Disrespect

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Congratulations. Oh that's awesome. How are you the doctor?

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How are you doing? Good to see you Doctor—Good to see you—

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Was he just hiding behind the camera?

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My God. He must have a futuristic vision through the glasses. It's almost like he knew he was gonna win the award

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(more laughter)

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That's incredible.

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This is your trophy so uh, congratulations,

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Is it gonna cut me?

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I mean—it's very heavy. It's bigger than the oscars

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(curse) THE OSCARS! (cURSE) YOU!

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Heyyyyy, I was gonna eat that. Okay, whatever floats your bot

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Hey human—THINK FAST—

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Who needs hands if you can't catch?

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Uh, okay, okay that game was cool. I—I definitely want to play it, good job

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Wow, the announcements so far has been pretty lackluster and uninteresting. I'm actually quite disappointed. oh

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OH MY GOD—

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BLOOD-BORNE 2!

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BLOOD BORNE TWOOOO!

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That's all you get: A little tease of the next project from software

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Thank you very much guys for that little tease of what they're working on next

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(eargasming asmr)

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Edward Trybeck, the composer of Star Wars The Old Republic

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He's put together an amazing tribute to the music of games so you guys ready to do this?

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YES

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The music is always the best part of game awards—ALWAYS

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(guy singing and playing guitar)

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The streamers and the communities on Twitch tonight are able to predict what they think is gonna win each category.

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So if you're on Twitch there's a twitch extension you can predict as you're watching this show live to see who you thinks gonna win

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The best action game category right now fans on Twitch are predicting that Cuphead is going—

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Come on, I need some video game announcements.

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Give me a game that I can truly play for my channel, something that I actually care about.

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But right now, let's move on to world premieres.

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Tonight, I am honored that some of the top game developers in the world have chosen the Game Awards as the place to reveal the first

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news on their next projects.

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Oh wow

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That was pretty good

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(sudden realization)

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NOOOOOOO

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And the Game Award goes t—oh man I have to pay a micro-transaction to unlock? That's so

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...stupid that this has to; hold on I got this guys, here we go.

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That's not true you didn't actually have to pay a micro-transaction get outta here man

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EA sucks, amiright? right pound it, pound the— pound the screen if you hate EA

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Sure, I'm getting a bag. I fucked this mess. It delivered, right? right?

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Where is it?

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Sir—SIT DOWN!

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Wow the—the graphics in this game look...

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...amazing. It stands out from anything else we've seen.

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It's almost like they're showing a movie trailer

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at the Game Awards. I wonder if they do that at the Oscars they show a,

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A game trailer at the Oscars

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(frickle) THE OSCARS! (frAckle) YOU!

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Fantastic, you keep coming. Me amigo Detoro. Gracias.

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(SAD SAD SAD MUSIC)

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Stop. Can you just stop, okay? Just stop I'm trying to help you guys

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Do you not understand? How many times do I gotta tell you NEVER never brofist onstage?

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Never handshake onstage, if you're live, don't do ANYTHING

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No human interactions with other people on live television

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Okay?

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You don't wanna end up like Adam Sandler touching a knee. I got nominated for a Golden Globe too, so I took my parents

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Just do us all a favor, okay, from the people that have already suffered

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I don't want you all to suffer anymore: no brofist, no handshakes, and no knee touching

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The wait is over. Let's begin

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Wow Soulcalibur looks really good. Yep, it looks like it's gonna be a good game, definitely

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somewhat of a decent game

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Ooo, so sorry

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(laughter) sorry

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(laughter)

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Was that a...

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Was that a baby inside Norman Reedus? 10 out of 10 best game—this one wins

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Honestly that trailer was really cool. I almost want Kojima just to make movies at this point.

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It's clear that that's where he's passionate. I'm so passionate to be here. I'm so excited to be and meeting this industry

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yes

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It's crazy, man, like, look

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this is, this is kinda insane.

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We're here with services, look the Oscars should fuck themselves up, this is the shit I'm telling you

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This is this is the real shit. Okay? Can you swear here?

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Okay, fuck the Oscars. You know

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(frick) THE OSCARS! (flip) YOU! I'm telling you! Like, this is bullshit!

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Here's the thing, the gaming industry it's an interactive

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Lot of films and now you're in games. Yeah, that's right. You know

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I've done six features about yeah, but okay. We're here to talk about our way out. Let's do it guys

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Yeah, let's get into your game

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I'm—I'm a little big jet-lagged, that's why I'm um—

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Jet lag also known as cocaine. Okay here we go finally—

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Now to announce winner of a Game of the Year game of the year Persona 51 global media

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outlets and the fans and this year, the Game of the awar—Game of the Year goes to

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Moonlight: Best Picture