WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:00.720 Hi! 00:00:00.860 --> 00:00:04.380 Are you interested, in the PewDiePie channel? 00:00:04.440 --> 00:00:06.440 Biggest channel, on YouTube! 00:00:06.840 --> 00:00:09.840 Much Better, than Jackspedicy- d *poods having editing error* 00:00:09.840 --> 00:00:11.480 Just ask this random person! 00:00:11.780 --> 00:00:15.520 ♪ HeRe I am HerE i am How dO u Do? ♪ 00:00:15.520 --> 00:00:16.840 See? *laugh* 00:00:17.040 --> 00:00:18.880 Subscribe today, for FREE! 00:00:19.580 --> 00:00:21.440 You can become, a BRO! 00:00:21.520 --> 00:00:23.420 For... for this price! 00:00:23.420 --> 00:00:25.100 Why do I feel like Marina Joyce.... 00:00:25.100 --> 00:00:27.080 We're gonna go through... Some commercials... 00:00:28.480 --> 00:00:28.980 I know. 00:00:29.440 --> 00:00:30.120 Great idea. 00:00:30.520 --> 00:00:34.160 I've looked for the worst, and weirdest commercials on the internet 00:00:34.460 --> 00:00:36.020 I thought we'd check them out to see uh... 00:00:36.440 --> 00:00:39.960 How bad can it be? How can it be?I think we all watched... 00:00:40.440 --> 00:00:44.160 Just some random.. the-ones-you-call-in commercials... 00:00:44.160 --> 00:00:45.440 During that place, during the day 00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:47.300 You have nothing to do, you're just sitting at home 00:00:47.340 --> 00:00:48.740 There is nothing to watch on television 00:00:48.800 --> 00:00:52.640 And you're just watching this fucking thing on TV and they are trying to sell you some shitty product 00:00:52.720 --> 00:00:58.220 And you are like " I don't know why i'm watching this, but i'm watching it and you know what, it's actually kind of entertaining 00:00:59.060 --> 00:01:00.040 "I'm not gonna bu-- 00:01:00.040 --> 00:01:02.480 YOU KNOW WHAT? I might even buy that shit!" 00:01:02.800 --> 00:01:04.280 And you buy it and use it once 00:01:04.280 --> 00:01:06.020 and the rest is history. 00:01:06.020 --> 00:01:09.460 Well, those kind of commercials we're going to check out today 00:01:09.460 --> 00:01:12.960 so "HeRe We Go!" as I always say. 00:01:12.960 --> 00:01:16.049 "Millions of women like yourself suffer from--" 00:01:16.049 --> 00:01:17.260 Just like me 00:01:17.260 --> 00:01:18.620 thank you for--uh not excluding... 00:01:18.800 --> 00:01:19.680 THE MEN! 00:01:19.800 --> 00:01:21.200 "a poor night's rest." 00:01:21.380 --> 00:01:23.540 "sleeping on your side without proper" 00:01:23.540 --> 00:01:26.420 "breasts support..." *ZOOM ON BOOBS* "...can be a major culprit" 00:01:26.420 --> 00:01:29.300 I will say yes, actually, it is a-- it is a big 00:01:29.310 --> 00:01:31.079 problem for me to sleep on the side for 00:01:31.079 --> 00:01:35.610 My breasts... uh... as a man, thank you. 00:01:35.610 --> 00:01:37.280 "Introducing KUSH" 00:01:37.280 --> 00:01:41.300 *Reggae Music plays* 00:01:41.300 --> 00:01:42.840 Introducing weed... no? 00:01:42.840 --> 00:01:45.149 "The comfortable nighttime companion" 00:01:45.149 --> 00:01:49.200 "anatomically (what is it?) contoured to gently support and cushion the w-" 00:01:49.220 --> 00:01:50.160 She just happened to have 00:01:50.160 --> 00:01:51.260 that little bag right there? 00:01:51.260 --> 00:01:55.520 "weight of a woman's breasts, Kush maintains a more natural sh--" 00:01:55.520 --> 00:01:57.800 *Reggae Music starts again* OOOOOOOOOOHH 00:01:57.820 --> 00:01:59.180 *Reggae Music continues* 00:01:59.180 --> 00:01:59.900 "OHH!" 00:01:59.900 --> 00:02:01.220 "and no garments needed!" 00:02:02.120 --> 00:02:02.620 "The slip resist-" 00:02:02.620 --> 00:02:04.460 *chuckles* 00:02:04.460 --> 00:02:06.980 How did you not see what was wrong with this? 00:02:07.860 --> 00:02:10.140 Sticking a long object between your tits 00:02:10.140 --> 00:02:10.760 How did you-- 00:02:10.762 --> 00:02:11.520 Did no one just think, 00:02:11.700 --> 00:02:12.740 "Hey, maybe... 00:02:13.040 --> 00:02:13.760 "just maybe that's like... 00:02:13.820 --> 00:02:14.960 "it looks a little weird?" 00:02:15.100 --> 00:02:19.500 "[slip-resistant] surface helps keep KUSH in place, even as you roll from side-to-side!" 00:02:19.500 --> 00:02:20.080 PEWDS: "Wow." 00:02:20.080 --> 00:02:24.060 "KUSH offers comfort and proper spine alignment for side-sleepers. 00:02:24.060 --> 00:02:26.180 "pregnant women, nursing mothers 00:02:26.180 --> 00:02:27.420 "and post-operative recovery..." 00:02:27.500 --> 00:02:28.660 I want to ask right now, 00:02:28.660 --> 00:02:30.620 it's a little awkward question but--uhh-- 00:02:30.620 --> 00:02:32.640 if you have a C-cup or larger 00:02:32.640 --> 00:02:34.870 is this a problem? is this a problem?? 00:02:34.870 --> 00:02:37.200 I'm genuinely curious uhh 00:02:37.340 --> 00:02:38.165 as a D-cup 00:02:38.165 --> 00:02:40.460 *oops* I-I mean as a B-cup! I don't... 00:02:41.300 --> 00:02:42.380 I don't know what to say 00:02:42.380 --> 00:02:43.680 Holy shit... 00:02:43.680 --> 00:02:44.200 Aww 00:02:44.200 --> 00:02:46.820 I guess they went out of business! NO! 00:02:46.880 --> 00:02:48.080 NOOOO! 00:02:48.080 --> 00:02:49.660 Not KUSH Support! 00:02:50.300 --> 00:02:51.080 GOD damn it! 00:02:51.080 --> 00:02:53.080 "Over 100 years we've been" 00:02:53.380 --> 00:02:56.290 "scrunching and folding toilet paper" 00:02:56.290 --> 00:02:57.880 A hundred years, guys! 00:02:57.880 --> 00:03:00.140 We've been wiping our ass 00:03:00.140 --> 00:03:01.740 with toilet paper 00:03:01.740 --> 00:03:03.086 "finally there's a better way" 00:03:03.086 --> 00:03:04.780 *claps* YES "Comfort Wipe!" 00:03:04.780 --> 00:03:07.280 "the sanitary paper extension arm and holder" 00:03:07.280 --> 00:03:09.760 "the first improvement to toilet paper as we know it" 00:03:09.760 --> 00:03:11.700 "since the 1880's" 00:03:11.700 --> 00:03:14.260 "it e--" The first improvement since the 1880s 00:03:14.260 --> 00:03:16.086 What happened in the 1880's? 00:03:16.086 --> 00:03:17.940 "Extend to reach a full 18-inches--" 00:03:17.940 --> 00:03:21.140 LOOK HOW LONG IT CAN EXTEND if you have your.... 00:03:21.280 --> 00:03:23.600 "It's as easy to use as a shower brush!" 00:03:23.600 --> 00:03:26.200 Ugh, that's disgusting dude. 00:03:26.200 --> 00:03:26.920 Why you--- 00:03:26.920 --> 00:03:29.520 you're not gonna use it as a shower brush 00:03:29.520 --> 00:03:30.540 "Pop on the toilet tissue and when through" 00:03:30.540 --> 00:03:34.260 "just press the release button and the tissue drops right into the toilet" 00:03:34.260 --> 00:03:34.980 OH MY GAHD 00:03:34.980 --> 00:03:38.300 "Think about it toilet paper is really archaic and disgusting!" 00:03:38.300 --> 00:03:39.750 I have never thought about that. 00:03:39.750 --> 00:03:41.019 Danny, have you thought of--- 00:03:41.020 --> 00:03:43.260 EMMA, have you thought about that? 00:03:43.260 --> 00:03:44.310 How chaotic and disgusting 00:03:44.310 --> 00:03:44.940 *unintelligible sounds* 00:03:44.980 --> 00:03:47.880 It is actually she does make a point 00:03:47.880 --> 00:03:50.780 Like it is kind of gross have how--how near your hand is to your anus 00:03:50.780 --> 00:03:52.160 but I mean you do... 00:03:52.160 --> 00:03:54.559 you do wash your hands afterwards you-- 00:03:54.559 --> 00:03:55.482 you do.. do that 00:03:55.482 --> 00:03:55.980 Do you?? *always wash your hands, kids* 00:03:55.980 --> 00:03:56.840 "That's right!" 00:03:56.840 --> 00:03:59.120 "Never touch another dirty toilet tissue" 00:03:59.120 --> 00:04:03.140 (Yep) "Bein' a big guy certainly has its advantages... and its disadvantages..." 00:04:03.220 --> 00:04:04.880 Ugh, dude, no. 00:04:04.960 --> 00:04:07.100 Wha--what did you say? 00:04:07.100 --> 00:04:09.480 "BeIn' A bIg GuY cErTaInLy HaS iTs AdVaNtAgEs... 00:04:09.480 --> 00:04:10.540 ...AnD iTs DiSaDvAnTaGeS." 00:04:10.540 --> 00:04:11.440 *disgusted pewds* 00:04:11.440 --> 00:04:12.840 "Comfort Wipe!" 00:04:12.840 --> 00:04:14.800 Dafu--- "the solitary paper extension arm and holder" 00:04:14.800 --> 00:04:16.440 "the first improvement to--" 00:04:16.440 --> 00:04:18.140 WHO WANTS TO STICK THAT UP THEIR ASS? 00:04:18.140 --> 00:04:19.900 Raise your hand 00:04:19.900 --> 00:04:20.420 *points to Danny* 00:04:20.460 --> 00:04:21.520 *sIlence* 00:04:21.520 --> 00:04:24.380 I think I got like, the budget budget version of this.. 00:04:25.420 --> 00:04:28.620 Oh, I got the--the "the standard bottom wiper" 00:04:28.620 --> 00:04:32.020 I guess we didn't get the "the deluxe one" 00:04:32.020 --> 00:04:33.280 but whatever we'll... *burp* 00:04:33.280 --> 00:04:34.972 We'll try it. We'll try, see if it's good... 00:04:34.972 --> 00:04:35.580 it could be good! 00:04:35.590 --> 00:04:36.090 Could be good! 00:04:36.090 --> 00:04:38.020 You gotta remain optimistic 00:04:38.020 --> 00:04:41.280 this is an anatomically designed 00:04:41.590 --> 00:04:42.402 Oh, That's strong. 00:04:42.402 --> 00:04:43.800 Its strong like a Swedish man... 00:04:43.800 --> 00:04:44.680 Oh 00:04:44.680 --> 00:04:45.955 Don't wanna break it 00:04:45.955 --> 00:04:49.000 Alright so, I have some...ah...toilet paper 00:04:49.000 --> 00:04:50.140 Uhh 00:04:51.300 --> 00:04:52.498 So let's... 00:04:52.498 --> 00:04:53.260 I guess 00:04:53.260 --> 00:04:55.100 I guess I have to wipe my ass? 00:04:55.100 --> 00:04:56.420 I mean... 00:04:56.420 --> 00:04:58.420 that was the point, wasn't it? 00:04:58.420 --> 00:04:59.260 to wipe your ass 00:04:59.260 --> 00:05:00.240 Okay so... 00:05:01.880 --> 00:05:03.720 Don't look, don't look 00:05:04.680 --> 00:05:05.820 Danny, don't look. 00:05:05.820 --> 00:05:07.060 Alright, Danny 00:05:07.060 --> 00:05:07.760 Go crazy 00:05:07.760 --> 00:05:11.320 *proceeds to wipe ass* 00:05:11.520 --> 00:05:13.740 it's a little.. it's a little hard but... 00:05:14.180 --> 00:05:14.680 *RIP PewDiePie Channel* 00:05:14.780 --> 00:05:17.100 Drank a lot of water, I really have to go 00:05:17.100 --> 00:05:21.000 people are waiting to tee off and there's no restroom out here 00:05:21.960 --> 00:05:28.040 *awful squidward impression* I drank a lot of water and now many echo echo room and shit man 00:05:28.040 --> 00:05:30.669 "Don't worry, I've got the perfect gift" 00:05:30.669 --> 00:05:31.226 "for you.." 00:05:31.226 --> 00:05:36.400 A gift? Oh, it's free... "Introducing the UroClub the discreet sanitary solution for your urgent relief" 00:05:36.520 --> 00:05:38.660 "Created by a board-certified urologist.." 00:05:38.660 --> 00:05:39.840 UH uh.... What? 00:05:39.840 --> 00:05:42.678 A board-cer....A board-certified?? 00:05:42.680 --> 00:05:44.900 "created by a board-certified urologist.." 00:05:44.900 --> 00:05:52.280 A urologist is a physician who has specialized knowledge and skill regarding problems of male and female urinary tract 00:05:52.280 --> 00:05:55.280 Well, if that's your specialty then I understand your boredom.. 00:05:55.280 --> 00:05:56.460 I real...I really do 00:05:56.460 --> 00:06:00.380 "but it contains a special reservoir built into the grip to relieve yourself" 00:06:00.380 --> 00:06:01.440 Ughh my god 00:06:01.440 --> 00:06:03.820 "the URO club goes with the special towel to keep your privacy" 00:06:03.820 --> 00:06:09.220 *The Rock's theme plays* 00:06:09.220 --> 00:06:10.960 Well, the real question is... 00:06:10.960 --> 00:06:11.980 Can you swing it? 00:06:11.980 --> 00:06:12.660 You know 00:06:12.660 --> 00:06:15.940 Can you swing that club after you dipped it in pi-- 00:06:15.940 --> 00:06:17.320 Does it add, you know.. 00:06:17.320 --> 00:06:19.490 Does it, will it cover my hook? 00:06:19.490 --> 00:06:21.350 You know, I've been having cooking a lot 00:06:21.350 --> 00:06:21.850 Will it fix that problem? 00:06:22.020 --> 00:06:24.780 "arry, leak-proof easy to clean" 00:06:24.780 --> 00:06:27.260 "And no more embarrassing moments in the bu..." 00:06:27.260 --> 00:06:27.880 JUST PEE IN THE BUSH? 00:06:27.880 --> 00:06:29.540 JUST PEE IN THE BUSH 00:06:29.540 --> 00:06:31.400 YOU'RE PEEING IN A GOLF CLUB INSTEAD A BUSH?! 00:06:31.400 --> 00:06:35.540 "bush... Dramatically improve your golf scores for only $49.95..." 00:06:35.540 --> 00:06:36.040 How? 00:06:36.040 --> 00:06:38.300 How will that dramatically 00:06:38.540 --> 00:06:40.120 increase my golf score 00:06:40.120 --> 00:06:40.760 Please... 00:06:40.760 --> 00:06:43.900 please, specify what the fuck you're talking about... 00:06:43.900 --> 00:06:45.300 "The URO club!" 00:06:45.300 --> 00:06:47.000 "The only Club in your bag" 00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:49.040 "guaranteed to keep you out of the woods!" 00:06:49.400 --> 00:06:50.700 *What the fuck did I just watch?* 00:06:51.060 --> 00:06:52.980 *frustrated sigh* 00:06:53.100 --> 00:06:53.902 If you are a guy... 00:06:53.902 --> 00:06:55.256 you don't have this problem 00:06:55.256 --> 00:06:57.348 because you--you could just pee in the bush... 00:06:57.348 --> 00:06:58.980 you could just be in the bush 00:06:58.980 --> 00:07:01.020 You just go off and then you fuck off in the bush... 00:07:01.020 --> 00:07:03.060 And if you're at a nice golf course 00:07:03.060 --> 00:07:04.840 they will have bathrooms 00:07:04.840 --> 00:07:06.268 they will have bathrooms 00:07:06.268 --> 00:07:07.680 just go at those.. 00:07:07.680 --> 00:07:08.780 Thank you 00:07:09.340 --> 00:07:11.460 Where did I park my car? 00:07:12.060 --> 00:07:13.500 Oh no 00:07:13.500 --> 00:07:14.680 Man, finer actors.. 00:07:14.680 --> 00:07:17.520 You really have to look for where.... 00:07:17.520 --> 00:07:20.380 Ah, where did I park my car? 00:07:20.380 --> 00:07:23.100 I am in agony 00:07:23.100 --> 00:07:26.420 unsufferable pain because where d-- 00:07:26.420 --> 00:07:29.242 where did I park my car? 00:07:29.242 --> 00:07:33.100 "Now there's an easy way to remember everything" 00:07:33.100 --> 00:07:34.992 "it's called My Lil' Reminder" 00:07:35.000 --> 00:07:37.560 "a digital voice recorder that records without tape" 00:07:37.560 --> 00:07:39.460 Blue Section, Row 18 00:07:39.460 --> 00:07:41.120 then reminds you later 00:07:41.120 --> 00:07:42.860 Blue Section, Row 18 00:07:43.220 --> 00:07:46.840 *laughs* 00:07:46.840 --> 00:07:51.060 "Or slip one on your key ring and you'll remember everything" 00:07:51.060 --> 00:07:53.840 That's left on main street then go to two miles at right... 00:07:53.840 --> 00:07:55.140 "So easy e--" 00:07:55.140 --> 00:07:57.600 Yeah, keep telling me where to go, bro... 00:07:57.600 --> 00:07:58.560 See he's like, 00:07:58.560 --> 00:08:01.260 Yeah, keep telling me where to go, bro... 00:08:01.260 --> 00:08:04.420 left on main street and go two miles at right... 00:08:04.420 --> 00:08:04.980 A note 00:08:04.980 --> 00:08:06.980 a piece of paper, a paper, a piece of paper... 00:08:06.980 --> 00:08:09.740 a piece of... a piece of paper have you heard of it?? 00:08:09.740 --> 00:08:12.260 a piece of paper, a paper, a piece of paper... 00:08:12.260 --> 00:08:15.160 "What do all women look at when buying jeans?" 00:08:15.160 --> 00:08:17.640 Oh my god you know this is gonna be good 00:08:17.640 --> 00:08:20.180 "What do all women look at when buying jeans?" 00:08:20.180 --> 00:08:20.800 "That's right!" 00:08:20.800 --> 00:08:23.260 "Their sexy or not so sexy bottoms" 00:08:23.260 --> 00:08:25.880 "Imagine being able to reshape your backside" 00:08:25.880 --> 00:08:27.680 "and achieve that ultimate shapely lifted booty" WHOA 00:08:27.680 --> 00:08:28.942 "instantly!" WHOA 00:08:28.942 --> 00:08:29.721 "It's here" 00:08:29.721 --> 00:08:33.100 "Hollywood's hottest new trendsetter, (NO WAY, WTF) BOOTY POP!" 00:08:33.100 --> 00:08:34.800 "Just like padded bra enhances..." 00:08:34.800 --> 00:08:37.940 "Booty Pop! Panties (BOOTY POP! *claps*) are now revolutionizing women's undergarments" 00:08:37.940 --> 00:08:38.800 BOOOOTY POP 00:08:38.800 --> 00:08:40.880 Where did we go wrong? 00:08:40.880 --> 00:08:43.460 "Boost your bottom and jeans," 00:08:43.460 --> 00:08:45.421 "shorts dresses and more!" 00:08:45.421 --> 00:08:47.940 "Introducing Wobble Wag Giggle ball" WOGGLE WAG GIBBLE 00:08:47.940 --> 00:08:51.080 "an interactive ball that makes the most hilarious sounds" 00:08:51.080 --> 00:08:52.880 Hilarious! "For just $14.99!" 00:08:52.880 --> 00:08:55.060 Edgar, Edgar... 00:08:55.060 --> 00:08:57.960 Here it is... 00:08:57.960 --> 00:08:59.840 he's looking at it 00:08:59.840 --> 00:09:02.940 Oh my god it's crazy I never heard him a 00:09:02.940 --> 00:09:05.960 "to make this the funnest deal on TV we'll double it for free!" 00:09:05.960 --> 00:09:07.900 OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 00:09:07.900 --> 00:09:12.320 "you can get two wobble wag (TWOOOO *claps*) for a low price for just.." 00:09:12.320 --> 00:09:13.220 Edgar, Edgar... 00:09:13.220 --> 00:09:14.165 Do you see this shit?? 00:09:14.165 --> 00:09:16.740 you're not going to be an annoying asshole anymore... 00:09:16.740 --> 00:09:19.550 You're fucking asshole. I hate you shut the fuck up. 00:09:19.550 --> 00:09:20.419 Here it is... 00:09:20.419 --> 00:09:22.490 The--the wiggle, the wiggle ball 00:09:22.490 --> 00:09:23.740 he's looking at it 00:09:23.740 --> 00:09:24.380 Wobble wag giggle 00:09:27.220 --> 00:09:33.800 *pug intermission* 00:09:34.000 --> 00:09:35.640 Oh my god, he's crazy. 00:09:35.640 --> 00:09:37.560 I never heard him make these sounds 00:09:37.560 --> 00:09:39.260 What the fuck is happening with the stuff 00:09:39.260 --> 00:09:49.240 *pug intermission* 00:09:49.240 --> 00:09:50.260 Great, that's great. 00:09:50.260 --> 00:09:51.120 Okay, alright. 00:09:51.120 --> 00:09:52.240 Enough with the Wiggle ball.. 00:09:52.240 --> 00:09:54.160 That's right, good... 00:09:54.160 --> 00:09:54.660 That's right. 00:09:54.660 --> 00:09:55.160 *EDGAR SMOL BORKS* 00:09:55.160 --> 00:09:56.140 Oh, enough with the-- 00:09:56.140 --> 00:09:57.440 Enough with the wiggle ball 00:09:57.440 --> 00:09:58.560 *EDGAR SMOL BORKS* 00:09:58.560 --> 00:09:59.060 You had enough with the-- 00:09:59.060 --> 00:09:59.600 *EDGAR SMOL BORKS* 00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:00.760 NO 00:10:01.280 --> 00:10:02.260 You don't control me 00:10:02.500 --> 00:10:03.800 Byyyeeeeeeeeee 00:10:05.080 --> 00:10:07.260 "You can get two wobble wag giggle balls" 00:10:07.260 --> 00:10:10.140 "for one low price of just $14.99" 00:10:10.140 --> 00:10:12.360 "It's the problem in the marriage bed" 00:10:12.360 --> 00:10:14.240 "that no one likes to talk about" 00:10:14.240 --> 00:10:15.791 "maybe that's why they call it..." 00:10:15.800 --> 00:10:17.040 "Silent but deadly" 00:10:17.040 --> 00:10:17.660 WHAT?! 00:10:17.660 --> 00:10:20.370 "well now there's a real solution to a very real problem..." 00:10:20.370 --> 00:10:22.650 "Introducing, The better marriage blanket" 00:10:22.650 --> 00:10:26.130 yeah no I imagine you know the number 00:10:26.130 --> 00:10:29.910 one reason for divorces the number one 00:10:29.910 --> 00:10:32.700 cost is farting underneath the bed 00:10:32.700 --> 00:10:35.610 iiiii divorced Frank because that 00:10:35.610 --> 00:10:38.010 fucking asshole kept farting over 100 00:10:38.010 --> 00:10:39.810 million Americans speak guns in their 00:10:39.810 --> 00:10:43.080 own what home backup protection bed sign 00:10:43.080 --> 00:10:46.200 shotgun Oh 1 million Americans keep 00:10:46.200 --> 00:10:48.690 dungeons for protection the Second 00:10:48.690 --> 00:10:50.190 Amendment to the Constitution guarantees 00:10:50.190 --> 00:10:53.130 all Americans the where their arms but 00:10:53.130 --> 00:10:55.560 these arms must be accessible if that's 00:10:55.560 --> 00:10:57.300 a product than one is that the product 00:10:57.300 --> 00:10:59.160 you've got at your bedside and is easily 00:10:59.160 --> 00:11:01.050 hidden by blankets and sheets the 00:11:01.050 --> 00:11:03.330 patented backup device clients easily 00:11:03.330 --> 00:11:05.970 that's a terrible idea gun in a 00:11:05.970 --> 00:11:08.100 nightstand there is a solution the 00:11:08.100 --> 00:11:12.110 patent pending gun vet holy shit 00:11:12.400 --> 00:11:16.390 there is a solution the patent can make 00:11:16.390 --> 00:11:18.790 it a shit boy I bet is quite possibly 00:11:18.790 --> 00:11:20.470 the biggest breakthrough in home defense 00:11:20.470 --> 00:11:22.570 since the invention of the firearm hell 00:11:22.570 --> 00:11:25.840 yeah and expensive introducing zooming 00:11:25.840 --> 00:11:28.510 but there are very high power binocular 00:11:28.510 --> 00:11:30.790 oh yeah like sunglasses don't look cool 00:11:30.790 --> 00:11:33.190 three hundred percent met three hundred 00:11:33.190 --> 00:11:35.770 holding heavy monoculars is tiring on 00:11:35.770 --> 00:11:37.840 your arms and heavy on your neck but 00:11:37.840 --> 00:11:40.060 zumiez binoculars yes look I call ever 00:11:40.060 --> 00:11:43.060 get you even have them on yes my why buy 00:11:43.060 --> 00:11:45.250 a big screen daily when you can just get 00:11:45.250 --> 00:11:49.450 to zumiez the zoomies let's try out the 00:11:49.450 --> 00:11:54.190 zoomies I'm excited for this one the 00:11:54.190 --> 00:11:55.990 whole packaging really screams quality 00:11:55.990 --> 00:11:59.080 up fuck did they say three hundred 00:11:59.080 --> 00:12:01.180 percent magnification is three hundred 00:12:01.180 --> 00:12:03.310 percent magnifications here's that's 00:12:03.310 --> 00:12:05.170 four hundred percent did I get the 00:12:05.170 --> 00:12:07.540 better version or four hundred percent 00:12:07.540 --> 00:12:13.900 Well, those kind of commercials we're going to check out today 00:12:13.900 --> 00:12:15.760 How did you-- 00:12:15.760 --> 00:12:19.630 Where do we go wrong as a species? 00:12:19.630 --> 00:12:23.260 "Now you can have that super sexy booty just like the celebrities" 00:12:23.260 --> 00:12:26.080 "to make this the funnest deal on TV we'll double it for free!" 00:12:26.080 --> 00:12:29.800 OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH 00:12:29.800 --> 00:12:30.820 "you can get two wobble wag (TWOOOO *claps*) for a low price for just.." 00:12:30.820 --> 00:12:36.470 Do you see this shit?? 00:12:36.470 --> 00:12:38.530 you're not going to be an annoying asshole anymore... 00:12:53.279 --> 00:12:55.170 You're fucking asshole. I hate you shut the fuck up. 00:12:55.170 --> 00:12:57.689 The--the wiggle, the wiggle ball 00:12:57.689 --> 00:13:01.759 Wobble Wag Giggle