WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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HOW'S IT GOING SQUADFAAAAM

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Today I wanted to ~flex~ on you, fam

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cause i have the new Honor 7X, i know, you're jealous

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I'm a huge Android fanboy

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I had the previous version of this and I'm super happy with this thing

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So, OBVIOUSLY, I'm gonna show it off

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It's got a full view feature, which makes the screen even bigger when you're playing games

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It feels amazing in your hand, seriously.... I could touch this thing all day

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The screen is amazing, the color is amazing!

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I've been playing in a couple games on it, and I never get lag, it's super smooth

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It's the perfect phone for gaming and I couldn't be happier with it. Honestly. It's a perfect phone for gaming

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I couldn't be happier with it, and the best bit: the battery life. I've been playing for 30 minutes. The battery hasn't even moved.

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I'm super super impressed with it, and I'm not just showing off this time

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I'm actually gonna give away five of these to you guys

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So just check out the link in the description and you can win one of these as well.

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I'll start the video, I just need to finish up, don't worry about it.

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~Check out: link in the description~

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Hellooooooo

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Everybody

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Got a microphone, green screen, what?! Pewdiepie really stepped up the quality

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And I noticed that and I'm gonna leave a like on this video because of that.

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MY GOD, It's hot in here!

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Here. We. Go.

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...interaction with people

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Cant wait to interact with people... This is definitely the most normal way you can do that

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..The fuck is this?!

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I spent all that time loading for this?!.. Dude. Oh my God.. alright..

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What the hell, where are you going?

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Hey man, hey hey hey, hey you, hey hey hey, hello

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Hey, hey, hey you, excuse me excuse me excuse me excuse me,

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Excuse meee! HELLOOo. HELLOOoo?

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HELLOOOo ...

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HI! HI! AHHHH! DAHHH!

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You wanna dragon ball them?.. Hey look. It's me!

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HELL YEA MAN....

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*pterodactyl screeches*

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Why is being social so difficult, it's hard enough in real life!

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how [do] I interact with people online?

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how?

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TELL ME! I want to be social

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I want to communicate

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I want to meet friends, but here I am alone in space..  ah

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Holy shit, I can be Guts... ho! ho! Oh!!

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OOOOooh! OOooh! OOOOOOooooh!

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This would be a lot more fun if I had friends... wait I can be a Yoshi car

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Great.

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Are you fucking kidding me?

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Pew pew, pew pew, pew pew!

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Hey, HAI, HEY!

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Hey, hey, hey hey hey hey hey hey, hey, hey what's up?

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Can you guys hear me?

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Can you see me? (here take this bow)

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(It's a submarine) No, It's a Yoshi submarine.

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(Guys can a submarine beat a robot?) YES IT CAN!

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I don't think they can hear me still.. Hello, can you hear me hello? Hello? Hello, CAN YOU HEAR ME?!

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CAN YOU HEAR ME??

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Hey, hey.. hey, hey... hey... HEY, hey hey hey, hello... hello.. hello, hello, hello, hey

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Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Hey. Can you hear meh? Helloooo.

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Hey, hey buddy, hey, buddy, can you hear me? Can you hear me?

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*whispers* Can you hear me?

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Hello. Hey..

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Can you hear me. Can. You. Hearah Meh.

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UUUAHHHHH!

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(You!) Yes!

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(Join us!)

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No!

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(*unintelligable* become a poopy butthole?)

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Where do I become poopy butthole?!

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(hey come on) yes?

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There he is!

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(come on, come on, don't be shy)

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Should i do it?! Should i do it?

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I can't go closer!

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No, no no!

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No! (Salad ass, you better do it) No. Nope!

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(Choose the poopy butthole!)

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Okay, alright I'm gonna do it!

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Alright I'm gonna do it!

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OOOOAHHHHH! One of us, one of us! Oh ah oh!

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REEEEK!

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Where's the Szechuan sauce? (Oh, okay, it's you)

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REEEKK!

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Where's the Szechuan SAAAAUUUCE!

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I'm pickle RIIIICKKK!

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(HEY! Fucking.. salad ass..) Yeah what up fam?

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(How you doing?) ...Not too bad man

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Jesus fucking christ.. what is that? Let me.. come on.. let me.. let me touch it

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(I will swallow you whole if you don't give me your gold right now.)

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Listen... listen fatty. Give me your fattest dab, and I will.. think about it.

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(What did you.. what did you call me?)

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I called you a fat son of a bitch huh, what you gonna do about it?

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(Okay, everyone turn around. I don't you to see this)

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No. no.. Hey, hey, hey, I have a wife.. please. stop, leave me alone!

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Where'd all the poopy butthole go?

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(All the poopy buttholes went to the different world, man)

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Which world? Take me there. Please my life depends on...

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(Alright Pewdiepie bro) What, I'm poopy butthole. What are you talking about?

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(Wait are you.. are you the real poopy butthole?)

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I'm the real poopy butthole, that's right. I keep trying to tell you, everyone.

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(Prima, do the little dance.)

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The poopy butthole dance?

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(Yes, right now) (Oh shit! He is the real one!)

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That's right, that's right, I've been trying to tell you guys!

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(Everyone else is a faker!)

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I know, everyone else has been faking me. Cause none of them, can do this. That's right. That's right.

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Look at this dance

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(The gods are up there, we worship these gods.)

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Oh i see!

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(He must be very high.. You see.. yes. Fate has praised them, yes! Get down on your knees! Worship!  worship...*laughing*)

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What is the benefit of this cult?

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(*laughing* Um, good healthcare!)

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(You can get your IQ over 3,000)

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Healthcare! Hell yea man!

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(free healthcare and your IQ increases by tenfold)

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Tenfold? I feel smarter already, you're right..

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(Yo penguin, everyone get the penguin)

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Yeah get the fu--- penguin ahhhh ablalaalla AHHHHH!

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KIYAAHH! AHHHH! AHHHH!

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Come over here you son of a bitch!

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*suspenseful music*

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*tension heightens*

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Get the fucking penguin!

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Where did he go? (fuck where'd he go)

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Goddammit (where'd the penguin go)

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(He's right there!)

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*suspenseful music intensifies*

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(Where's Saladass?)

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Hey, penguin, penguin if you join, we'll give you massage. (Oh WTF)

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Alright, let me just let me just (Yeah,  look. He'll give you a little massage)

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(Ah yeah, you like that penguin?)

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This is just the beginning

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(What the fuck am i witnessing?!)

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One of us, one of us! *chanting*

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(Alright Saladass is my second in command)

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No no no no, I'm the leader.

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(No, we've been through this)

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We voted and i won! Let's have a vote! Let's vote!

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This is a democracy!

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(I call for a revote)

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This is election night in America.

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Listen: there will be free healthcare, for everyone, at all time...

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(You cant steal my idea!)

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No, shut up, shut up. I will offer the same healthcare, but get this:

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It's better.

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(Yeah)

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That's right. Yeah. I know.

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(How is it better, explain to me.)

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Free tacos.

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Every Friday, I will do... the hardest dab I have ever done.

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To prove to me that this man is not worthy... (You're so lucky you have a vibe system, otherwise..)

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Here it comes.... are you ready?

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(HEADPHONE USERS RIP)

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P A A A A A!!! AHHH!

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A A H H

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*USA National Anthem*

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(squadfam out)

