WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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*epic music*

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Heeeyyyyy YouTube

00:00:06.560 --> 00:00:08.320
*Music intenseifies*

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Tic

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Tok

00:00:10.240 --> 00:00:11.040
Tic

00:00:11.040 --> 00:00:11.920
Tok

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Where the FUCK is my diamond play button?

00:00:14.960 --> 00:00:17.820
It's been 84 YEARS!

00:00:17.820 --> 00:00:19.820
*satan of roast*

00:00:19.820 --> 00:00:22.060
Yeah that's right YouTube, I said it!

00:00:22.700 --> 00:00:23.720
You think I'm scaaaared??

00:00:23.720 --> 00:00:25.920
Like all the other pussy ass YouTubers???

00:00:26.340 --> 00:00:27.820
Like Markiplier,

00:00:27.820 --> 00:00:29.300
Jacksepticeye,

00:00:29.300 --> 00:00:31.300
Or CinnamonToastKen

00:00:31.320 --> 00:00:33.320
[Ken]: OH SHIT WHADDUP?

00:00:33.420 --> 00:00:35.400
[Felix]: Oh shit it's yo boy!!!

00:00:35.460 --> 00:00:35.960
[Ken]: YO BOY

00:00:36.020 --> 00:00:36.520
[Felix]: YEAAAH

00:00:36.720 --> 00:00:37.360
[Ken]: IT'S YO BOY

00:00:37.360 --> 00:00:38.720
[Felix]: WELCOME TO THE ROAST!!

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*warrior scream*

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[Felix]: BIIITCH

00:00:39.900 --> 00:00:40.400
[Ken]: BITCH

00:00:40.660 --> 00:00:43.040
[Felix]: PREPARED TO GET INFIL--

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*pewds dictonary breaks..*

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[Felix]: What's the word?

00:00:45.200 --> 00:00:46.300
[Felix]: INFILTRATE!

00:00:46.300 --> 00:00:47.700
[Felix]: PREPARE TO GET......

00:00:47.700 --> 00:00:49.320
*processing...*

00:00:49.320 --> 00:00:50.480
[Felix]: ANNIHILATED!!

00:00:50.480 --> 00:00:52.840
*screams of roasters.. or roosters. you choose*

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*dramatic music*

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[Felix]: Hey Youtube!

00:00:59.720 --> 00:01:02.940
[Felix]: What a great stream service you got there with YouTube Red!

00:01:02.940 --> 00:01:05.120
[Felix]: Too bad Netflix has already been a thing!

00:01:05.120 --> 00:01:06.920
[Ken]: OOOOOOHHHH NETFLIX IS ALREADY A THING, BITCH

00:01:06.920 --> 00:01:08.400
[Ken]: OHHHH

00:01:08.400 --> 00:01:11.100
[Felix]: Please still fund YouTube Scare PewDiePie

00:01:11.100 --> 00:01:11.740
[Felix]: YouTube Red

00:01:11.740 --> 00:01:12.360
[Ken]: But you ain't SHIT

00:01:13.060 --> 00:01:13.560
[Ken]: BIIIIITCH

00:01:13.560 --> 00:01:15.420
[Felix]: THAT'S RIGHT YOU AIN'T SHIT THOUGH

00:01:15.720 --> 00:01:16.360
[Felix]: BIIIITCH

00:01:16.800 --> 00:01:19.900
[Felix]: And how about that YouTube streaming service???

00:01:19.900 --> 00:01:22.320
[Felix]: Good thing Twitch isn't already a thing

00:01:22.320 --> 00:01:22.980
*Kens heart attack begins*

00:01:22.980 --> 00:01:24.380
[Ken]: Oh, oh God!

00:01:24.380 --> 00:01:25.800
[Ken]: The truth, he speaks the TRUTH!

00:01:25.800 --> 00:01:26.300
[Felix]: I speak the truth

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[Ken]: JESUS! OH JESUS!

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[Ken]: Aah!

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[Ken]: Tell 'em wassup , tell 'em wassup

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[Felix]: Hey YouTube!

00:01:33.540 --> 00:01:35.680
[Felix]: That comment system is fucking awesome!

00:01:36.140 --> 00:01:37.800
[Felix]: Just kidding, IT SUCKS!

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[Ken]: OHHHHH THE POWER OF PEWDS COMPELS YOU!

00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:41.180
[Ken]: THE POWER OF PEWDS COMPELS YOU

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[Felix]: IT COMPELS YOU!

00:01:41.780 --> 00:01:42.540
[Ken]: WOOOOOH!

00:01:42.540 --> 00:01:43.340
[Felix]: ARE YOU COMPELLED?

00:01:43.340 --> 00:01:44.480
[Felix]: ARE YOU COMPELLED????

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[Ken]: I FEEL THE HOLY SPIRIT OF PEWDIEPIE!

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[Felix]: YEAAAH

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WOOOOOOH WOOOOH

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[Felix]: Ohh, is it hot in here??

00:01:49.580 --> 00:01:51.580
[Felix]: OR IS YOUR ASS JUST GETTING ROASTED?

00:01:51.760 --> 00:01:52.940
[Ken]: RUBBER DUCKS, BIITCH!

00:01:53.080 --> 00:01:54.040
[Felix]: RUBBER DUCK!

00:01:54.300 --> 00:01:55.500
[Felix]: Wait, what the fuck..

00:01:55.700 --> 00:01:56.600
[Felix]: Hey YouTube!

00:01:56.860 --> 00:01:58.760
[Felix]: Google+ was a great idea (no it wasn't)

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[Felix]: Too bad FACEBOOK ISN'T ALREADY A THING!

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[Ken]: OHHHHH CLOWN ART

00:02:02.760 --> 00:02:03.260
[Felix]: OH!

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[Ken]: OHHHHHHHHHHHH!

00:02:03.780 --> 00:02:04.280
[Felix]: OH!

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[Ken]: OHHHHH!

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[Felix]: OH!

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[Ken]: OHHH!

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[Ken]: Leave a like :)

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[Felix]: Hey YouTube!

00:02:07.840 --> 00:02:08.560
[Felix]: I'm proud of you

00:02:08.560 --> 00:02:10.600
[Felix]: You made so much money throughout the year

00:02:10.600 --> 00:02:12.600
[Felix]: OHH WAIT YOU DIDN'T MAKE SHIT!

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[Felix]: OOOOOOHHH

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*Ken dies*

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*giggle*

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[Felix]: HOW BOUT YOU TAKE MORE THAN 45% MORE OF OUR INCOME?

00:02:20.020 --> 00:02:20.980
[Ken]: Wait......

00:02:21.300 --> 00:02:21.860
[Ken]: What?

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.....?

00:02:22.740 --> 00:02:24.180
[Felix]: Yeah yo- they take 45%

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*Processing information..*

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*relieze's*

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[Ken]: 45 percent?

00:02:26.400 --> 00:02:27.040
[Felix]: 45 percent.

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(maybe 45% can be our always)

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*laughing*

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[Felix]: YOUTUBE GAMING?

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[Felix]: MORE LIKE YOUTUBE LAMING!

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[Ken]: OHOOHOHOH

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[Felix]: Up top

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[Ken]: HOHO

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*fail highfive*

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[Ken]: HOH

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*awkward silence*

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[Felix]: ...You missed on purpose right?

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*laughing*

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[Felix]: YouTube Red

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*zooms in dramaticly on Pewds and Ken's face*

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[Felix]: More like

00:02:49.560 --> 00:02:50.060
[Felix]: You-

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[Felix]: YouT-

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[Felix]: YouPorn!

00:02:52.980 --> 00:02:54.300
[Felix]: Uhm, RedTube

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OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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[Felix]: Hey YouTube!

00:02:59.680 --> 00:03:02.220
[Felix]: Your search algorithm is so corrupt

00:03:02.220 --> 00:03:05.600
[Felix]: IT MAKES VLADIMIR PUTIN LOOK LIKE JEZUS!

00:03:05.600 --> 00:03:06.860
[Ken]: OOOOHHH JEZUS

00:03:06.860 --> 00:03:08.000
[Felix]: DO WE NEED ANOTHER LEAFY?

00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:08.640
[Ken]: WOOO!

00:03:08.640 --> 00:03:11.220
[Felix]: DO WE NEED ANOTHER CLICKBAIT PIECE OF SHIT??

00:03:11.220 --> 00:03:13.200
*Pewds dancing while Ken squishs teh  rubber duck on himself*

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*doorbell*

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[Felix]: Who the fuck is dat..?

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[Ken]: I think its me....

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da fuck?

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[Felix]: I'll check it out!

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*amazing sound*

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*dundundun*

