WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.420
waaaaaalllmaaarttt (echos)

00:00:02.420 --> 00:00:03.360
*smiles*

00:00:03.620 --> 00:00:07.000
Youtube has become a reality TV show, everybody,

00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.000
from Tanacon, to Fouseytube

00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:10.400
toooooooooooooooo (drumroll please)

00:00:10.400 --> 00:00:15.000
the fight between KSI and Logan Paul and Jake Paul and Deji

00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:16.580
i wasn't even gonna watch it...

00:00:16.580 --> 00:00:18.580
i didnt even care when i heard about it

00:00:18.580 --> 00:00:20.480
but then the memes *ding *

00:00:20.620 --> 00:00:23.000
the beautiful- the beautiful memes.

00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:24.560
wherever there is memes

00:00:24.560 --> 00:00:25.940
i will be there (to kill them)

00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.580
and the last press conference was a beautiful thing

00:00:28.580 --> 00:00:38.560
Jake/Logan: (chants a curse upon KSI and Deji)

00:00:38.600 --> 00:00:40.280
waaallmaaart

00:00:40.360 --> 00:00:42.600
last conference was in LA,

00:00:42.600 --> 00:00:44.600
this one took place in UK, if you ask me

00:00:44.600 --> 00:00:48.000
the Paul brothers won the first press conference

00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:49.400
they just went full meme

00:00:49.400 --> 00:00:51.400
KSI and the Deji? they just weren't ready for it

00:00:51.400 --> 00:00:52.120
*chuckles*

00:00:52.120 --> 00:00:53.540
you can tell

00:00:53.540 --> 00:00:54.680
(logan paul impostor stares into your soul)

00:00:54.680 --> 00:00:56.600
so now this one takes place in UK

00:00:56.600 --> 00:00:58.600
and no one like the Pauls in UK

00:00:58.600 --> 00:01:02.600
Jake Paul : Aye! Y'all dumbasses say anything ELSE?!

00:01:02.600 --> 00:01:04.600
Deji: BOOORING! (Deji chants his curse upon jake)

00:01:04.600 --> 00:01:06.600
Crowd: BOORING! (crowd makes curse stronger)

00:01:07.660 --> 00:01:09.100
Jake: Y'all say anything else?

00:01:09.460 --> 00:01:10.400
P: like, Walmart

00:01:10.600 --> 00:01:12.600
*giggles*

00:01:12.600 --> 00:01:15.500
you guys keep saying the same thing, WALMAAAAAAAAART

00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:16.600
*laughs*

00:01:16.600 --> 00:01:20.240
their press conference started off, half of it is completely normal,

00:01:20.600 --> 00:01:23.800
because -  because it's not youtubers involved,

00:01:23.800 --> 00:01:25.340
it's actual boxers.

00:01:25.440 --> 00:01:26.640
True Geordie (ref): "You used to be a boxer?"

00:01:26.860 --> 00:01:27.360
Undercard guy 1:"YEAH"

00:01:27.520 --> 00:01:29.180
person: we owned this charity called rethink.or-

00:01:29.180 --> 00:01:29.820
pewds: no one cares

00:01:29.860 --> 00:01:32.600
blah blah blah charity this charity that c'mon

00:01:32.600 --> 00:01:33.340
Jake: yeah.

00:01:33.340 --> 00:01:34.600
pewds: then the youtuber comes out

00:01:34.600 --> 00:01:41.980
Jake: Boo if Deji's a bitch! *Crowd Boos* (x2)

00:01:42.600 --> 00:01:46.240
pewds: they fell - i can't, i mean the audience must feel de-destroyed right now

00:01:46.320 --> 00:01:47.720
i cant believe they fell for that

00:01:47.820 --> 00:01:50.600
oldest trick in the book. well played Jake.

00:01:50.600 --> 00:01:52.600
Jake (Dumbass): Thought you guys were on Deji's team?

00:01:53.900 --> 00:01:54.600
YEEEEAAH (mating call)

00:01:55.020 --> 00:01:56.940
DID SOMEONE THRoW AN AIRPLANE???

00:01:56.980 --> 00:01:58.780
(repeats mating call)

00:01:58.980 --> 00:02:04.320
basically, people kept throwing things on stage and the ref got so done.

00:02:06.820 --> 00:02:07.440
Jake: Respect. (all about it in japan according to logan)

00:02:07.440 --> 00:02:07.940
Geordie: "Don't be throwing anything"

00:02:07.940 --> 00:02:08.960
Jake: "Yeah"

00:02:09.160 --> 00:02:10.520
Geordie: Don't be throwing nothing, alright?

00:02:10.720 --> 00:02:12.580
Spoilers, people gonna keep throwing stuff (how could you)

00:02:12.960 --> 00:02:15.520
even outside there was a riot and people throw,

00:02:15.520 --> 00:02:16.960
G Fuel (dramatic sound effect)

00:02:16.960 --> 00:02:18.700
can you believe this?!?!?! (no)

00:02:18.760 --> 00:02:20.060
Who just throws G Fuel (beings of pure evil)

00:02:20.060 --> 00:02:21.260
Geordie: Alright,

00:02:21.260 --> 00:02:23.260
And his opponent...

00:02:23.260 --> 00:02:26.880
It's Deji.  *crowd cheers*

00:02:26.880 --> 00:02:29.280
pewds: and then out comes Deji and he finally has,

00:02:29.340 --> 00:02:30.980
a crowd that cheers for him (for the first time)

00:02:31.060 --> 00:02:32.880
(Havana by Camila Cabello plays ?????? I don't really know tbh)

00:02:34.240 --> 00:02:37.800
(Jakes bodyguard becomes an overprotective mother)

00:02:42.460 --> 00:02:42.960
AH, AH

00:02:43.320 --> 00:02:45.320
LOOK AT THE PIT STAINS

00:02:45.320 --> 00:02:46.660
HE'S SWEATING!!!!!

00:02:48.180 --> 00:02:49.460
Jake: Look at his pit stains!

00:02:49.500 --> 00:02:50.600
Jake: HE'S SWEATING! (which is heresy)

00:02:51.240 --> 00:02:52.980
Jake: LOOK AT THE PIT STAINS!

00:02:53.040 --> 00:02:54.140
Jake: HE'S SWEATING! (watch for spanish inquisition)

00:02:54.240 --> 00:02:54.860
Geordie: Don't be throwing anything.

00:02:54.860 --> 00:02:55.700
Jake: (mating call)

00:02:55.700 --> 00:02:56.680
Geordie: (essentially repeats)

00:02:57.800 --> 00:02:58.600
(mating bird gets attacked by hawk)

00:02:58.600 --> 00:03:02.000
(not captioning this, Jake Paul is retarded)

00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:04.280
Geordie: -cause it's an easier fight. Is that true?

00:03:05.740 --> 00:03:06.240
(another hawk)

00:03:08.340 --> 00:03:10.600
Can we stop throwing (BRRR) because everyone's gonna go home.

00:03:10.700 --> 00:03:14.120
Jake: Next boxing gym: home of 0 world champions.

00:03:14.120 --> 00:03:15.580
Deji: 0 world champions?!

00:03:15.640 --> 00:03:18.120
(Geordie tries to talk to Jake but Jake's too focused on why his mating calls have no effect)

00:03:18.180 --> 00:03:19.040
*patting the mic*

00:03:19.040 --> 00:03:20.040
YOUR GYM IS BAD

00:03:20.040 --> 00:03:22.780
*continues patting the mic*

00:03:22.780 --> 00:03:24.180
YOUR GYM IS TRASHED

00:03:24.860 --> 00:03:27.060
Jake: (repeats)

00:03:27.060 --> 00:03:28.100
*jake pats the mic*

00:03:28.620 --> 00:03:34.660
Jake: C'mon in today to Vic's boxing gym! We train Deji and that's it.

00:03:34.660 --> 00:03:36.800
Deji: DAMN STRAIGHT! DAMN STRAIGHT!

00:03:37.060 --> 00:03:38.380
Deji: THAT'S HOW IT IS!

00:03:39.320 --> 00:03:43.020
pewds: (feels the cringe) oh my god, the comebacks are so dumb, and so bad.

00:03:43.020 --> 00:03:43.940
here's what he's saying

00:03:44.120 --> 00:03:49.460
you don't say, "Yeah, that's it!" you say, "Yeah, they only need to train the Number 1!"

00:03:49.760 --> 00:03:50.260
or

00:03:50.400 --> 00:03:54.420
"Yeah, I don't even need training to break your spleen right now."

00:03:54.420 --> 00:03:57.420
but then they get into the real stuff, the really important

00:03:57.740 --> 00:04:00.140
the-the comical observations

00:04:00.600 --> 00:04:02.060
like, "What are you wearing?"

00:04:02.060 --> 00:04:03.820
Jake : He's still dressed like BRRR

00:04:04.020 --> 00:04:08.680
TrueGeordie : Do you think he's deliberately uploading like these lots of (...) for this fight?

00:04:09.880 --> 00:04:13.200
TrueGeordie : Do you think Jake Paul is putting minimum training footage.

00:04:13.200 --> 00:04:14.340
Jake : At least try on the second-

00:04:14.440 --> 00:04:16.660
TrueGeordie : JAKE! JAKE, CALM DOWN, CALM DOWN ALRIGHT? (geordie puts jakey to nappy)

00:04:17.420 --> 00:04:22.940
TrueGeordie : Do you think that Jake is deliberately putting bare minimum videos up to make it look like he's not training

00:04:23.440 --> 00:04:26.060
so he's got excuses or d'you just think he's trying to hide it from you?

00:04:26.060 --> 00:04:26.860
here's the question.

00:04:26.860 --> 00:04:32.300
Do you think Jake is putting up bare minimum videos to sh- hide that he's actually training?

00:04:32.580 --> 00:04:34.740
What is the answer to the question?

00:04:34.920 --> 00:04:37.140
Deji: I just hope he can fight better than he can dress.

00:04:37.400 --> 00:04:39.140
cuz Jake dress like BRRR.

00:04:39.660 --> 00:04:41.660
You are actual BRRR.

00:04:43.280 --> 00:04:45.280
You are actual BRRR.

00:04:45.440 --> 00:04:51.100
u dwess bad. no U dwess bad. Uh-huh. no U dwess bad *laughs*

00:04:51.620 --> 00:04:54.220
Jake: Let it out. Let it out. -----
Deji: Yeah, whose period blood is that.

00:04:55.340 --> 00:04:58.200
Whose period b- YOU'RE WEARING RED TOO!

00:04:59.660 --> 00:05:00.620
god dammit

00:05:00.620 --> 00:05:02.620
TrueGeordie: Deji is clearly smaller than you.

00:05:02.620 --> 00:05:03.900
Deji: My man, you're still wearing heels.

00:05:04.340 --> 00:05:07.620
Jake : There's zero percent chance that Deji wins this fight.
Deji: Why are you wearing high heels?

00:05:08.120 --> 00:05:10.040
(Jake repeats while Geordie peeks)

00:05:10.040 --> 00:05:14.460
*chuckles* the ref checks if he's actually wearing high heels *laughs*

00:05:14.720 --> 00:05:17.480
he's like... "Those are high heels actually"

00:05:17.760 --> 00:05:18.580
*ukulele note plays as a crow flies*

00:05:20.460 --> 00:05:20.980
TrueGeordie: No touching.

00:05:24.640 --> 00:05:26.200
TrueGeordie : Don't throw anything. C'mon.

00:05:26.280 --> 00:05:28.380
Deji: (chanting) Leave the stage! Leave the stage!

00:05:28.880 --> 00:05:31.260
Deji: Yeah YEAH

00:05:31.520 --> 00:05:32.600
*earrape*

00:05:32.660 --> 00:05:37.660
honestly I think Jake Paul won that one because he actually delivered insults and despite being,

00:05:37.660 --> 00:05:41.640
fish out of water. it's all Deji fans here. It's all KSI's fans

00:05:41.780 --> 00:05:43.640
he handled himself well i thought.

00:05:44.160 --> 00:05:45.640
Deji didn't really say any thing.

00:05:45.640 --> 00:05:46.420
B U T  T H E N

00:05:46.420 --> 00:05:48.560
when it looked like it was all over

00:05:48.560 --> 00:05:54.440
Deji delivers the fattest line, the most devastated line i-of the century

00:05:54.440 --> 00:05:59.880
*epic music* i have never heard an insult so efficient that it completely switched the whole thing around

00:05:59.880 --> 00:06:00.920
and Deji won it.

00:06:05.540 --> 00:06:06.920
Deji: (chanting) Suck your mum, suck your mum

00:06:06.920 --> 00:06:11.040
(repeats) (chant is bass boosted as Deji insults Jake)

00:06:11.040 --> 00:06:13.380
*crowd joins*

00:06:13.380 --> 00:06:16.760
*a battle army joins*

00:06:17.220 --> 00:06:18.700
suck your dad. suck your-

00:06:18.700 --> 00:06:20.700
WHAT IS THIS *laughs* SO DUMB

00:06:21.660 --> 00:06:26.820
TrueGeordie: What they installed, no more throwing BRRR seriously because the whole thing will stop straight away.

00:06:26.820 --> 00:06:27.340
(hawk rebels)

00:06:27.340 --> 00:06:28.280
Just do us all a favour.

00:06:28.280 --> 00:06:32.760
next up Logan comes out and he looks like he had the worst s*** of his life i honestly

00:06:33.200 --> 00:06:34.920
eh, i am a bit concerned about him

00:06:38.080 --> 00:06:38.880
*fart sound*

00:06:41.820 --> 00:06:42.320
*one more*

00:06:43.900 --> 00:06:46.160
Pew : what is up with him? look at him

00:06:46.260 --> 00:07:02.700
*tragic low-key music plays as logan gets a Vietnam War flashback*

00:07:02.780 --> 00:07:03.460
*earrape*

00:07:03.660 --> 00:07:06.160
And then, out comes KSI

00:07:06.160 --> 00:07:09.080
*crowd cheers as KSI with Logan Paul wig comes out*

00:07:09.080 --> 00:07:10.460
Oh. snap.

00:07:10.580 --> 00:07:11.820
he did not.

00:07:12.800 --> 00:07:13.880
he wore the wig.

00:07:14.500 --> 00:07:15.280
omg

00:07:15.320 --> 00:07:17.420
*crowd cheering continues*

00:07:18.240 --> 00:07:20.540
KSI: that walmart BRRR won't work here boi

00:07:20.700 --> 00:07:21.380
*crowd cheers*

00:07:21.460 --> 00:07:22.780
Pewds : what is he doing? he's just-

00:07:22.780 --> 00:07:23.700
*pewds laughing*

00:07:25.280 --> 00:07:26.400
*more laughter from pewds*

00:07:27.900 --> 00:07:29.380
Pewds : Oh Logan!

00:07:29.620 --> 00:07:31.320
...he looks like he's about to cry

00:07:31.360 --> 00:07:33.400
KSI: Hasn't England already suffered enough?

00:07:35.360 --> 00:07:37.500
We lost to Croatia in the semi-finals...

00:07:38.180 --> 00:07:40.400
We had Trump come over last week...

00:07:41.120 --> 00:07:43.220
NOW WE GOT *YOU* THIS WEEK!

00:07:43.400 --> 00:07:45.220
*applause from the crowd*

00:07:50.060 --> 00:07:51.400
KSI: How you feelin' bro?

00:07:51.900 --> 00:07:53.700
he doesn't look like he's feeling well

00:07:53.700 --> 00:07:57.740
you're literally in a room with a thousand people that just despise you

00:07:58.340 --> 00:07:59.040
Jesus!

00:07:59.100 --> 00:08:04.760
KSI: How are you, gonna try and audition for Baywatch...

00:08:05.340 --> 00:08:06.680
get the part...

00:08:07.080 --> 00:08:08.820
and still not end up in the final movie?

00:08:09.020 --> 00:08:11.020
*loud applause from the crowd*

00:08:12.220 --> 00:08:14.440
My song ended up in the final movie!

00:08:16.560 --> 00:08:17.980
Wher- Where were you?

00:08:18.200 --> 00:08:18.920
Oh yeah...

00:08:19.220 --> 00:08:20.620
DELETED SCENES. (ouch)

00:08:20.700 --> 00:08:22.760
pewds: OHHHHHHHHHH *warped laugh*

00:08:22.980 --> 00:08:23.940
👏              👏

00:08:23.940 --> 00:08:25.080
OHH OHH OHH

00:08:25.680 --> 00:08:27.420
aww that's gotta hurt

00:08:27.880 --> 00:08:32.820
the end of this is beautiful cuz he- he just stops going after Paul, Logan.

00:08:32.820 --> 00:08:35.260
and he goes after her(!)- his parents instead (bad speak)

00:08:35.260 --> 00:08:36.240
KSI: -lusional dad

00:08:36.240 --> 00:08:36.980
*crowd*

00:08:37.720 --> 00:08:38.960
You're disgusting, mate.

00:08:39.800 --> 00:08:41.600
You said you'd beat me in the fight...

00:08:41.600 --> 00:08:43.260
(repeats)

00:08:43.260 --> 00:08:44.940
....with one hand right?

00:08:45.340 --> 00:08:46.880
You wouldn't do BRRR!

00:08:47.920 --> 00:08:49.180
You're an old man!

00:08:51.960 --> 00:08:56.860
But I'm sure, I'm sure, you wouldn't mind lasting one round of all the little girls you like kissing.

00:08:57.040 --> 00:08:58.100
Pewds: OHHH

00:08:58.100 --> 00:08:59.060
*crowd cheers*

00:08:59.060 --> 00:09:00.020
AHHA HOH

00:09:00.120 --> 00:09:00.620
ugh

00:09:00.980 --> 00:09:03.740
OHH OW DAMN OHH

00:09:03.940 --> 00:09:06.380
oh my god, he looks like he's trying to be twenty.

00:09:06.380 --> 00:09:09.160
KSI: YOU SICK, DEAD BEAT, BALD-HEADED PBRRK

00:09:09.360 --> 00:09:10.720
Pewds : omg

00:09:11.540 --> 00:09:15.100
KSI: How you gonna make not one but two dumbass children? (he has a point)

00:09:15.400 --> 00:09:16.120
*crowd cheers rise*

00:09:16.120 --> 00:09:18.240
The f- is wrong with your sperm?!

00:09:18.240 --> 00:09:20.240
*pewds loses it*

00:09:20.440 --> 00:09:22.120
Logan Paul's father : If you wanna ask about the...

00:09:22.120 --> 00:09:23.340
*KSI mocks*

00:09:23.420 --> 00:09:24.560
...ASK YOUR MOM! (terrible your mom insult)

00:09:24.660 --> 00:09:25.500
Pewds : oh wow
Logan Paul's father : ASK YOUR MOM

00:09:25.500 --> 00:09:27.240
AHHH YOUR MOM

00:09:27.360 --> 00:09:28.840
Jesus Christ

00:09:28.940 --> 00:09:31.960
this thing is so DUMB i can't believe it *chuckles*

00:09:32.120 --> 00:09:33.940
KSI: Is that lip quivering?
Logan : Yo! Hey!

00:09:33.940 --> 00:09:35.620
KSI: Is that li- How's that lip?
Logan : Hey, I would

00:09:35.620 --> 00:09:36.840
Logan : ...love to sit here...

00:09:37.020 --> 00:09:37.920
and answer your questions...

00:09:38.360 --> 00:09:41.100
I feel like KSI addressed everything.

00:09:41.100 --> 00:09:42.200
London, I'm out!

00:09:42.200 --> 00:09:43.740
I'll see you in August 25th. (leaves like a girl)

00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:45.740
Pewds : DAMN I CAN'T BELIEVE HE BAILED

00:09:46.040 --> 00:09:46.540
(hero saves mic)

00:09:47.560 --> 00:09:49.280
KSI: Oh where you going bro?

00:09:49.460 --> 00:09:52.300
*trademark maniacal laughter*

00:09:52.420 --> 00:09:54.420
*epic battle opening music*

00:09:54.520 --> 00:09:57.500
Youtube is a strange place right now,

00:09:57.780 --> 00:10:00.040
but it's entertaining at the very least

00:10:00.140 --> 00:10:01.480
at least we have that,

00:10:01.480 --> 00:10:03.040
at least it's not boring,

00:10:03.040 --> 00:10:05.760
(reads) Logan Paul has disconnected from The Lobby

00:10:05.760 --> 00:10:06.860
*chuckles*

00:10:06.860 --> 00:10:09.400
man, he didn't even try, did he? Jesus Christ.

00:10:09.400 --> 00:10:12.920
next up is the fight. i don't know why i am so invested at this point (me with ur captions)

00:10:12.940 --> 00:10:13.900
this is so dumb,

00:10:13.900 --> 00:10:16.640
i hate how i'm invested. it's like when you watch trash TV (love island)

00:10:16.640 --> 00:10:19.140
and you're like, "Why am I watching this?!"

00:10:19.300 --> 00:10:21.020
no. i don't want - just go away

00:10:21.180 --> 00:10:25.120
Deji, uhh, seemed like no one was rooting for him, like

00:10:25.120 --> 00:10:29.880
all his friends, Keemstar, they're all like, "Ah...

00:10:29.880 --> 00:10:31.260
...I don't think he can beat Jake.

00:10:31.680 --> 00:10:32.980
Jake is a lot bigger."

00:10:33.020 --> 00:10:35.720
but i felt bad for Deji. i was like, "Damn!"

00:10:35.720 --> 00:10:40.340
especially after the LA conference, i'm like 'wow, no-one's rooting for him, he changed trainer--

00:10:40.340 --> 00:10:44.180
but he's also such an idiot, he's also so dumb.

00:10:44.180 --> 00:10:46.160
like, it's very conflicting emotions here.

00:10:46.160 --> 00:10:49.020
i want to root for Deji, but he's just too much of a moron

00:10:49.200 --> 00:10:52.140
but then again you have Jake, who's a double moron

00:10:52.140 --> 00:10:55.960
i think the reason why this match is so interesting is because i don't care who wins.

00:10:55.960 --> 00:11:02.000
it's the same thing, but what i hope happens is that Jake wins, over Deji,

00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:05.520
because to be honest, i don't care who Deji fights next, right?

00:11:05.520 --> 00:11:10.320
i would rather see Jake challenge someone else next-- that would actually be interesting

00:11:10.320 --> 00:11:16.980
i think KSI's gonna beat Logan Paul, and i also hope that's gonna happen, not necessarily because i hope KSI's gonna win--

00:11:16.980 --> 00:11:22.660
but-- Logan Paul, he probably had the worst year of his life, i do feel a little bad for him

00:11:22.660 --> 00:11:26.280
he never really recovered after the whole Japanese incident

00:11:26.280 --> 00:11:31.780
and yes, he's a moron, yes everyone knows now he's a moron, but-- i feel like---

00:11:31.880 --> 00:11:33.840
there are definitely worse people on youtube

00:11:33.880 --> 00:11:38.940
and then KSI can go on and challenge more people as well, so you have one winner from each team.

00:11:38.940 --> 00:11:42.700
that's what I hope, at least, i don't know why i care,

00:11:42.700 --> 00:11:48.520
i don't care, by the way, trust me, i don't care, like *laughs* could go either way-- I DON'T CARE, alright?

00:11:48.520 --> 00:11:52.860
Why am i promoting this for free they're just going to claim the video like last one.

00:11:52.860 --> 00:11:59.900
*sweet Tetris guitar cover music*