WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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I'm a master mind in military stratigement.

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(Epic music with war scene)

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*screaming battle cries*

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*heroic music*

00:00:07.920 --> 00:00:10.200
(Another war scene with epic music)

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more war screams!

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*war*

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(Norway wins)

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Filthy nazi norweigans

00:00:19.620 --> 00:00:22.080
Filthy Nazi Nergejinkskxj Norwegians...

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*dancin'* RAGDOLL GAMES...

00:00:24.320 --> 00:00:25.440
HilARious

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It is getting funny than this!

00:00:25.660 --> 00:00:27.600
It doesn't get funnier than THIS

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"More ragdoll games please"

00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:29.600
Riddle Games is like, a gift from god

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Ragdoll games is like... a gift from God.

00:00:33.120 --> 00:00:34.420
[God, definetly not Pewds] Here ya go Pewds.

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[God, for sure] More views. Another RAGDOLL game

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It's made by Landfall Games which is a Swedish developer

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So you know it's gonna be a

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Bomb ass ǝɯɐƃ

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It's called "TOTALLY ACCURATE BATTLE SIM-

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that looks AMAZING, this is...

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See this is the kind of game where...

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ANYONE CAN PLAY. (anyone)

00:00:49.600 --> 00:00:51.420
You could literally put a ragdoll

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In front of this game and it's still funny

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OHH Okay.

00:00:55.600 --> 00:00:55.760
which one did I summon

00:00:55.760 --> 00:00:58.100
I summoned- Which one did I summon?

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(The red ones Pewds)

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I'm gonna guess these are my guys (You guessed right!)

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GO BOYS GET 'EM

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*X-treme fighting*

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Ahh shit they got fucked the useless piece of shit

00:01:07.640 --> 00:01:08.620
I bet they're Irish

00:01:08.620 --> 00:01:10.620
FINE, we're doin' the Cannon crew.

00:01:11.080 --> 00:01:12.860
Send in THE CANNON CREW

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FOUR SPEARMEN :o

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SIX SPEARMEN :O

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What the FUCK IS THE CANNONCREW DOIN'???

00:01:21.040 --> 00:01:21.800
FAYAH!

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*boom*

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*Battle simulator games expectation*

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*Reality*

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HOLYSHIT

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FIRE DIS CANNON

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SHOOT- DSH-- YESH!

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...cannon...

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...ass...

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[Neon Genesis Evangelion Op. ]

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CANNON ASS      (Chinese: Chinese Characters/Kanji)

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10/10 would watch

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*back to pewds*

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I LOVE THIS GAME !!!

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BALLISTA

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Pvt. Pewds: But sir!

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*chuckles*

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Pvt. Pewds: You can't afford a banother ballista. We can't afford to lose another ballis-

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Commander Pewds: SHUT THE FUCK UP! We're doing the ballista!

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Youtuber Pewds: Oh, wait we don't-- we can't afford it.

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Pvt. Pewds: That's wutch I wush trying to say you.

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SHUT UP

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Okay... alright...

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No no no, no NO! GO TO THEM (The archers)

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DAMMIT. >:|

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*Death*

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*Louder death*

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*pain and sadness*  (sadder than Titanic)

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war...

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has changed...

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*Boing*

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That guy got shot in THE FUCKING HEAD.

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FOR SWEDEN.

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This game is driving me insane I love it.

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OOOH

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The catapult.

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Two catapults...

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And the peasants!

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10/10 Strategic Placing

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CHARGE THE CATAPULT

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(FAYAH!)

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*Extreme concentration*

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WHAT R THOSE *sick vine reference bro.*

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WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE?!

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JESUS CHRIST, MAN.

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WHAT R THOOOOSE

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OH MY GOD HE COMES BACK

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*laughs like a goose*

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WAT ARR DOOOOOOOSS

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This guy is AMAZING!

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I'm like the best goddamn war general...

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Sweden has ever known

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I'm like Gustav the 2ND FUCKING ADOLF.

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I rek shit. I know how to fuckin-...

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*light echo* I know how to kill people! (Dafuq Pewds!?)

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You think we just let Norway be it's own country?

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FUCK THAT.

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It's time, to PAYBACK!

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IT'S TIME TO GIVE US THAT OIL MONEH

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It's a... FIERCE battle...

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You out BIDDED me on EBAY... I'll GET YOU FOR THIS.

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COME BACK HERE YA BITCH

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THAT'S RIGHT.

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*Epic 1v3 clutch with epic background music*

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*this is gonna take a bit longer*

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*ah, here we go*

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JÖRGEN IS GOIN' TO GET HIM.

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JÖRGEN PIERCES his nipple!

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For Sweden...

00:03:50.520 --> 00:03:52.560
For Gustav II Adolf...

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*GUSTAV INTENSIFIES*

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You'll never stop JÖRGEN ON THEIR BALLISTA.

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Unless you fuck the ballista, that is GADAMMIT.

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Ohh. Does that guy have his fuckin' sword up his ASS?

00:04:03.320 --> 00:04:06.960
GODDAMN NORWEGIANS AND THEIR FETISHES MAN

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THE BATTLE OF HELSINGBORG...

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Don't make me laugh you Finnish SCUM.

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FINNISH SCUM.

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I'll FINISH you. (No pun intended)

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Am I FINNISH?? NO

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I'm SWEDISH. (The more you know)

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WHAT THE HELL, MAANN, WHAT'RE YA DOOOIIIIN?!??!

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FUCKING COWARDLY ASS FINLAND

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HE'S TRYING TO BE A TREE THINKING NO ONE WILL KILL HIM!!

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GET 'EM BOI

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WATERYA DOIN WERDYA GOIN!?

00:04:31.580 --> 00:04:33.940
Aw shit, he's in b-deep trou-.

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AH DON'T GO RIGHT AT HIM! GO, GO RIGHT AT HIM! (Make up your mind Pewds!)

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Don't- OH MY GOD THAT WORKED!

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(EPIC MATRIX WORTHY SLOW-MO WITH KICKASS MUSIC)

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"Remember all the pain he's caused, the people he's hurt!!"

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"Now make that your power!"

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AAAAUUUGHUUAUAAHGHGHAUAUAUGH

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(Cannon to the face)

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Oh shit headshot!

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*heeerp*

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Oh, there's a chance!

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(Hopeful joik music from the north...)

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C'mon bois!

00:04:59.860 --> 00:05:01.540
(Hopeful, inspiring joik music from Sápmi)

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Tonight we dine in HELL!

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(this is SWEDEN)

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*war and joik music*

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*Just war things*

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(Sad joik from the north)

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(Such a dramatic joik...)

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D':

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Me: You don't know what joiking is???

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Me: Well, ya better go google it

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*slowmo* OOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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(Joik, joik, joik joik joik, joik)

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Naaaaawwwwwww! D:

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AHhh...

00:05:43.580 --> 00:05:44.200
(sad, so sad, it's a sad sad situation)

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*war*

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I...

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I'm down...

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My hoke- (Wut?)

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I'm not...

00:05:54.620 --> 00:05:55.540
the Swedish general...

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I'm just a piece of shit YouTuber... :(

00:05:59.540 --> 00:06:01.540
That yells in the microphone too much... (isn't that Jack)

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But i'll be back!

00:06:03.640 --> 00:06:05.020
And, uhhh, yeah!

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Th- I really enjoyed this game, I think it's really cool

00:06:07.600 --> 00:06:09.060
Check out the link in the description.

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Landfall Games, you're making really cool stuff lately, I appreciate ya

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*smoochy smooch*

00:06:13.380 --> 00:06:14.300
And as always...

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Stay awesome, bros.

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*BROFIST*

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I don't think you're ready for this, but okay, are you, are you?

00:06:18.420 --> 00:06:19.600
I mean I.. look dude

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I've seen some of the weirdest stuff out there

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This cannot possibly shock me.

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*dancing men*

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*weird music??*

00:06:26.920 --> 00:06:28.300
FIVE LITTLE MONKEYS JUMPING-

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Woah! wha?

00:06:29.980 --> 00:06:30.420
ONE FELL OFF AND BUMPED HIS HEAD (Cringe...)

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*pewds silently laughing*

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*end*