WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en-GB

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Youtube has a problem that I absolutely hate

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which is drama.

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I cant think of anything more stupid to waste your time on..on..on.on...

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Tze - tze - tze - tze - TZE

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No.

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Couldn't have been more wrong!

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I take it all back!

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I changed my mind! (I like bananas)

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Damn it!

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What do people on YouTube want more than anything?

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Creative, original...content?

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No, fuck that they want views, damn it!

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And I think you know where I am going with this (Clickbait?)

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What gives views more than anything? (Clickbait)

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(Epic stare)

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That's right.

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Drama.

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Past Pewds: YouTube has a problem that I absolutely hate...

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Past Pewds: ...which is drama.

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How could I have been so wrong???

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You know I watched that video and - just

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Disgusted.

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Now, you've probably seen some drama going on from one YouTuber to another

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Left Hand: Hey I don't like your - I don't like you.

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Right Hand: No - ha...

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Righh Hand: Oh, I'm gonna roast ya!

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And then they - and then they roast back

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and the views - the views just go back and forth

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like a tennis ball

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Why a tennis ball?

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The monster feeds itself...

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Listen.

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Me!

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I

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aren't gonna just start some petty drama with some other shitty YouTuber.

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Anyone can fucking do that!!!

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Ok???

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I'm gonna start drama with EVERYONE!

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All the YouTubers you like!

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FUCK em'

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I'm gonna make them feel so bad

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So shitty

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That they're gonna - they're gonna make a "The PewDiePie rant" video.

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Hopefully...

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And then FINALLY, I'll be relevant

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Here we go!

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FIVE!

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FOUR!

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THREE!

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TWO!

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ONE!

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(Victim #1) CinammonToastKen

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Fat.

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(Victim #2) Scarce

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Fat.

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(Victim #3) Cry

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Probably fat.

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I'm not gonna have any friends after this *laughs*

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(Victim #4) JackSepticEye

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Irish cunt.

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(Victim #5) RiceGum

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North Korean cunt.

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(Victim #6) iDubbbz

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25 and balding.

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(Victim #7) KSI (with Deji's picture)

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Triggered by anything.

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RihannaVEVO

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Ugly.

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(Victim #9-10) Dan and Phil

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Are they dating?

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No, we won't fucking tell you!

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Fuck you, you'll never know!

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(Victim #11) Edgar

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Worst fucking dog.

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(Victim #12) SeaNanners

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I laugh at everything... as long as it gives me views.

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SeaNanners

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I laugh at anything to sh- hide that I'm unfunny.

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(Victim #13) Shane Dawson

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Wishes he could come out twice.

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(Victim #14) JacksFilms

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Gay vibes.

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(Victim #15) Taylor Swift

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Ugly.

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(Victim #16) FouseyTube (with a Tupac picture)

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Worst channel on YouTube. (laughs)

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(Victim #17) SkyDoesMinecraft

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Definitely still enjoying Minecraft.

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(Victim #18) DanTDM

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Definitely still enjoying Minecraft.

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(Victim #19) KickthePJ

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Needs to be kicked.

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(Victim #20) Markiplier

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Cry baby. (still best youtuber though)

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(Victim #21) h3h3

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Too many chins.

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(Victim #22) EgoRaptor

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Too many chins.

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(Victim #23) Leafy

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Chin implants.

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Think about it.

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Oh I could go all night son!

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I could go aaallll night...

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(Music intensifies) (Victim #24) EmmaBlackery

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More like EmmaBoo-hoo-my-life-is-so-hardery.

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(Victim #25) Dillon the Hacker

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Can't even fucking hack!

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(Victim #26) Roman Atwood

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Quality content!

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(Victim #27) Jenna Marbles

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More like I am ten times hotter than all my profile pictures than what I really am (voice strains from all the roasts)

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(Not even a victim) KEEMSTAR!

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He's a nice fellow...

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He's a NICE fellow.

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(Victim #28) Lilly Singh

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The definition of trying too hard.

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(Victim #29) FilthyFrank

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I love him.. (laughs)

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(Victim #30) Philly D

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Oh yeah, I've been on YouTube longer than you so you can fuck off!

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(Victim #31) TobyTurner

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Drug issues.

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(Victim #32) Marina Joyce

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Drug... issues...

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Who said that - Who said that?!

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(Victim #33) Video Game Dunkey

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Not black.

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(Victim #34) Zoella

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The worst content I've seen but still... doing pretty well.

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It's pretty good.

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(Victim #35) CaseyNeistat

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The only person on YouTube with a bigger nose than I have.

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(Victim #36) Hey, I'm Boogey and I wanna be everyone's friend.

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(Victim #37) FaZe Clan

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Almost as relevant as Call of Duty.

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(Victim #38) Syndicate

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Made the slimiest move on YouTube that I have ever seen and somehow still making videos.

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(Victim #39) Kwebbelkop

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Head almost big as ego.

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(Victim #40) Hillary Clinton

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Dying.

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(Victim #41) YouTube

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Dying.

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(Victim #42) PewDiePie

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Wish I was.

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(Music stops after Pewdiepie sets the world record for the most people roasted in one video with a total of 42 people)

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Was that a good - Was that a good exit? (Kisses Mic intensely)

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I got em' good, didn't I?

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I can't wait for all the drama, I can't wait for all the dr-views.

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Oh boy...

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I roasted them hard.

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I'm just gonna sit back here...

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Don't forget to check out my Patreon, link is in the description

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Thank you so much for watching

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Leave a like because

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All the phans are gonna hate on me now so I need you to leave a like to protect me and not just because I want more likes, okay?

