GOSHDAMNIT–
WHERE'S MY VIDEO???
I have no videos for today (sound of silence but it's oof)
[Is he calling YouTube again?]
[Oh, it's just Marzia] Pewds: BRAD!!
WHERE'S DA VIDEO???
Sive2: Hewwo? :3
Pewds: YOU HAD ONE JOB, MARZIA >:CCC
Marzia: Oopsie :P I did an oopsie UwU
*Pewds, this isn't YLYL, y r u laffin*
Sive2/Marzia: Guess it's time to make one now! owo
Pewds: You owe me one– Brad: And then I'll edit it *-*
Marzia: Boiiiii uwu
Pewds: Byyehhhee XDD
Pewds: Oh, I have a gr8 idea! (u sure do poods)
Pewds: L-let's review the...you had one job subreddit! uwu
Brad: That's a GR8 idea. Let's review–
Pewds: Came out of nowhere! (u finally admit ur gayness)
Brad: Now.
Brad: I don't make YouTube videos anymore, I don't want to do it...*laughs* *end his depression*
Brad, Pewds: *talking at the same fucking time and I don't have patience for dat shit*
Pewds: We're lookin' at the r/YouHadOneJob subreddit.
Pewds: So you will learn, that you have one job, which is to edit videos.
Brad: Yes Sir. Sorry Sir
Pewds: Chocolate. Now zero eighty nine dollars
Wow, what a great price.
A spunow.
ooh
My favourite.
Have you ever had a spunow? Brad.
What the...
Brad: Oh no...
This hurts me.
Felix: Well "skor" means "shoes" in Swedish.
You think that's what it is?
(ur kidding felix)
Sive 2: Skor?
Felix: Want some sKoR??
Brad: Thirty-nine grams of shoes?
You sell shoes in grams in Sweden?
Felix: That's how we know the sizes..
Brad: It's probably why it's 87 cents.
What- why is it such..
..a specifically...
This is fake.
F: I don't know...
B: What do you reckon?
F: Wait, wait- they wrote NICKERS (woah felix watch ur language)
-and SICKERS.
B: What? How?
It cAn'T bE rEaL. This cAN'T bE rEaL-
Someone picked up that chocolate bar
turned it upside down and went
Oh, wait it looks like the..
..it looks like a word
..make a fake sign
No way, dude.
B: I vote...I vote fake.
on the first one.
F: I vote...real
just because I want to believe that people are stupid
B: H-h-holy...
..s h i r t.
O h n o!
I mean it looks pretty clean, though.
F: It looks like...it hasn't been worn yet.
B: Yeah, it looks pretty fresh.
F: Who realized out of nowhere
"hey I'm gonna return that ONE shirt"?
B: They must've put that away, and then gone
"Oh, I never wore this."
cause it's never been worn. (felix's loud laughing)
and they've outgrown it or something, you know?
and they were like, "Oh, I'll take it back!"
But the thing is, it worked!
They must've gotten their money back.
F: Yeah, it worked!
They got their $24.50 back.
B: Yeah, they still got the tag on it, I just realized
This- this is okay by me
I'd give a guy, like what is that, $20?
I'd give a guy $20 if he came in and was like
B: I bought this 17 years ago.. F: Here you go, sir!
B: I don't want it..
F: It's the latest fashion now B: I'll just take it out of my own pocket
B: Yeah, I mean that was pretty good.
I'd wear that. sWaG!1!!!
(never say that again sive2)
F: sWAG! (felix is a lost cause at this point) B: Real.
F: You r- you reckon real?
I reckon real too, actually.
B: What the hell am looking at?
(reading post)
F: Okay so, there we go. That's how you know it's real.
(Felix reading post)
Okay, it's definitely for real.
(Felix reading post)
F: Jesus...
F: ...Christ B: Oh my god.
F: jEsUs chRiSt....
B: Oh...my god-
It looks like that game that you play!
What's that game called?
Where you have to go to their house
and they have an argument in the kitchen?
Old Pewds: Nope, nope, nope (MEMORIESSSS)
No I don't
nO I DONT
nO i DoN'T
Present Pewds: Oh, Facade!
B: Facade!
F: Faca- tHEY LOOK LIKE FACADE
F: YOU'RE RIGHT OH MY GOD! B: They look like Facade!
F: Oh [REDACTED]
F: How did the size of their eyes change
if she's "retouching" the photo?
B: Could you hand that over...to someone?
Seriously...
F: I mean you look further away and it's like
"eh, you know, it's a.." (laughs)
B: The guy doesn't look too bad on the right.
Relatively- relatively speaking to the others.
The lighting also can't be that bad.
Surely, cause look at the dogs
F: Yeah, I was thinking the same, I don't know.
I like how she said, "my professor never taught me"
"to retouch photos"
Well, you don't say.
B: I told the truth in a Twitch stream the other day, right?
And it was-
I'm just curious as to whether you're
still...sort of eating the powder
of the GFUEL?
F: What do you mean?
B: You told me that you like the cotton candy flavor so much
that you've been spooning it up in your hand
and eating it without diluting it with water.
F: I mean just the cotton- B: And I have to know if you're still
B: doing it because you're gonna die.
F: I'm gonna- why?!
B: I love G FUEL, I LoVe g fUeL
more than you love money.
And that's a lot.
B: But- F: Yeah?
B: But, if you eat it with just F: What? What's gonna happen?
B: If you eat that without diluting it
you are GOING TO DIE.
F: but it's SO GOOD! B: Definitely
F: and this is why I have a G FUEL sponsorship
and you DON'T, Brad.
So stop tryna trick me.
Let me eat directly the cotton candy
F: And slowly kill myself. B: I don't think even G FUEL
B: would want you to promote eating it, just like-
F: I'M NOT PROMOTING IT!
I JUST TOLD YOU I LIKE IT!
B: What the-
F: You just gotta make sure you don't breathe it in
when you put it in your mouth.
B: Yeah, no that's what it is.
It's just breathing it in.
You could eat as much as you want of it in powder form
but don't breathe it in!
F: Just don't breathe it in...
B: That's what'll get ya!
(Brad reading picture)
F: What the-
B: oh my WORD!
F: NETFLIX!
B: What is this? Netflix Dark Reboot
of Clifford the Big Red Dog.
F: That picture looks sexually intended as well
B: It looks like something is going on, yeah.
It looks like something is going on
at the other end of this- the picture.
The sand.
B: Buried him in the sand but F: oKaY.
B: but ONE part of Clifford is still showing. ; )
B: ...his BIG RED-
F: Okay, p a w.
That's right
B: It's his paw.
F: This one HAS to be real
B: Yeah, they [REDACTED] this up all the time, don't they?
F: Yeah, they do, yeah
(Felix reading post)
F: HUNDRED PERCENT REAL.
F: I don't- this happened to ME already.
B: Oh my god, for sure yeah.
This is- this happens every day
no doubt whatsoever.
The beginning of Ace Ventura where he's smashing the box up
F: Oh yeah! B: Walking down the street
It's not him making a play on postmen.
This is just how they are.
I think it's what they have to do.
B: I think it's just part of the- F: Yeah it's just, yeah.
F: I hundred percent understand it as well.
B: If- if it was my job, I would also do the same thing.
F: Whenever there is signs on the things that says like:
okay, "Please be careful" or "this side up".
I'm always thinking like, "why bother?"
They don't give a [REDACTED].
B: It's like when you have luggage
and you're like "This is fragile."
and then you look out the window of the plane
and then they're launching them into the hold.
B: I don't think Germany uses this flag anymore
-moving on!
I just edited that one out.
(Brad reading post)
But that's the sign! They must've bought that.
F: I guess so, yeah.
B: Right?
B: Like that's- F: That's a strange
F: pulling technique.
B: Maybe this is the entrance to the Jedi temple.
F: Oh? Force push and forSH...pull?
B: Force pull yeah.
B: It still kind of doesn't make sense but it's the best-
It could be Photoshop but I don't think so.
just based on the shadowing.
F: That's exactly what I was gonna say, yeah. (what is ur english, felix? )
B: Yeah this is- this is for sure real.
B: But- F: For real.
B: So many people are at fault.
The guy that made it
The guy that bought it
and the employee that put it up.
F: The guy that SOLD it as well!
F:...or the wahmen.
F: Well I've seen this one before and I already think it's fake.
Don't be silly, wrap your willy.
Take one for free.
B: Yeah, this is for sure just in someone's university dorm room.
F: Yeah, like a little meme.
B: They were like "haha, this is funny."
F: Who writes a smiley face the wrong side?
(Felix reading top comment)
B: That's the issue here really
is that one person will use one of them.
You know-
The person who made this is like "haha, that's a funny joke."
but there is a dumbass out there
who will pick one of those off the wall and use it.
F: I think what's more likely is that someone picks it off the wall
and gives it to someone.
because you won't really see that it's poked (??)
B: Le epic praaank! XD uwu
B: We've ruined your liiiife!
F: You've got a child now!
B: Just put an effing comma.
B: What?!
What am I looking at?
F: People are eating, comma
F: children in this area. B: Ohhhhhh.
B: People are eating.
Children in this- oh my god.
F: People are eating CHILDREN!
B: People are eating childr-
This is like a- this is inclusive.
Gone crazy where we start to accept cannibals
back into society, you know?
This is a 𝓬𝓪𝓷𝓷𝓲𝓫𝓪𝓵 society.
This is a cannibal children eating area.
B: Please.. F: Please.
if you don't mind, this is where cannibals eat their children
and walk their dogs.
Okay, and you're discriminating against cannibals
if you don't let them.
(Brad reading)
Oh my word.
Oh-
F: You know this is real
but that's why it's so funny.
B: So what would you like on your metal plate sir?
(repeating the engraving)
and then that arrives.
Oh god. Certainly sir! Absolutely.
Good god.
(Felix dying)
F: You know this is in America.
I mean not just from the look of the place.
B: Oh my god, I didn't even see it
cause of this tiny little screen that I'm looking at.
Oh my god.
F: What are you plugging in your sink?!
F: Wait, what is it supposed to say?
Wait, what is..
B: Drug free school zone, surely.
But the person who put it up
was just on some drugs
and they've put it up all
Look at it! It's up wrong
It's slanted, it's...screwed.
Oh wow.
F: I like these cause
I don't know what the issue is right away.
Dinosaur kids pillow case.
i dOn'T sEe tHe iSsUe.
B: The issue is that
you think you're buying the pillowcase
but if you look, it's just the image of the kid
on the pillowcase.
F: tHE IMAGE OF THE KID-
B: It took me a moment as well
F: Oh that's great
Would you like this picture of a child sleeping to sleep on?
B: No way, surely.
This is a joke, like someone has downloaded the JPEG
and printed it and like ironed it onto their own pillowcase.
F: Dinosaur...kids...pillowcase.
I gotta find it.
B: Yeah see, it's fake.
F: They changed the photo.
Son of a...b*tches.
B: Now we gotta pay and make it look like this.
(Brad reading)
B: Yeah that's the wrong...end.
It's the wrong end.
There's been 4 children in there for 30 years.
F: There is already a bunch of children in there, yeah
B: They've been in there for so long
they're adults.
They just- they're tunnel people.
F: Once they're grown up, they manage to come out from the land
B: They have to grow tall enough to reach the top.
People have been giving them food down there
They've been living in there for years.
(Felix reading)
B: Jesus Christ-
moving on.
Next-
Next image, thank you.
That's not even Santa!
He just lied to her, creeped up behind her like
IT'S ME, SANTA.
F: Oh wow, great.
B: Soccer players, seriously.
What is wrong with them?
They just ruin the sport because
everyone just thinks they're a bunch of pussies.
B: They're all like- super ripped.
They're all like strong and really athletic.
If you had a fight with one in the street
they would kick- they would kick the hell out of you.
You can pretend to be injured
but if you're injured as an adult male now
you just go
(Brad nutting)
"Oh bloody hell, my leg hurts."
F: And maybe you limp a little bit
B: You don't put your hand up to your head
like a Shakespearean character
F: I must cover my face now from the immense pain B: (nutting again)
F: so no one can see it.
B: tHe pAiN'S sO tErRibLe..
Oh dear, my legs..
You don't do that, you go-
(NUT)
You've kicked me in me shins!
You bastard...
F: Oh, what a dick move.
Who made this?!
B: Oh no...
B: Rocco's never coming home. F: ROCCO-
F: Rocco's never coming home! B: 𝓻𝓸𝓬𝓬𝓸 𝓲𝓼 𝓷𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓱𝓸𝓶𝓮
B: This is how you teach kids that dogs run away.
(Felix reading)
B: Nope! That's the end of video. (srsly sive2?)
F: That's the end of the video everyone!
B: I'm pulling the sink plug.
F: We're completely out of time right there!
B: wHaT a ShAmE
B: if only we could read the next one. F: wHAT A SHAME
B: But we can't F: Ugh, I just wanted to
B: due to time. F: see what it was about!
F: Due to time.
B: 𝓓𝓾𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮. F: We'll see you next time
F: 𝓓𝓾𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮.
B: That's it, I guess we'll have to see in the next one.
F: In the next video
if we get enough thumbs up
and smash likes on videos.
B: Smash like!
And don't eat G FUEL dry!
F: Don't forget to use code PEWDIEPIE at the check out.
(STOPITFELIX)
F: That's...
𝓭𝓮𝓵𝓲𝓬𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼.
AD FELIX: You want pyramids?
We got 'em!
Oh, you're into castles, huh?
We've got you covered, baby!
You want some PETS?!
E A S Y!
We!
Got it!
All!
This game is STILL relevant, god damn it!
(I DID IT DAD!!)