WEBVTT
Kind: captions
Language: en

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(jazzy music)

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- Hi I'm Hannah, you're
friendly neighborhood wine mom

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and if you're anything like me,

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you believe that a glass of wine at 8pm

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makes you a better mom.

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So pour yourself a glass and let's talk.

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Now today we're drinking a dessert wine.

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It is mango wine because I just ate

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basically 8,000 grams of
carbs in the form of pizza

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and bread sticks and
it's time for dessert.

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So a couple of weeks ago we did a video

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about judgey parents and
you guys totally owned it

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with these amazing comments.

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Sharing stories of all the
times that you were judged

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and overcame it.

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When that video was
released, I was on a trip

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with my husband with no service

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and I went to this middle
of nowhere rest stop

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just to check on the video
and I saw all of the comments

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and just burst into tears
in front of everyone

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because it was so beautiful.

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So thank you so much and
I want to keep it going,

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so let's talk about something

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that I see in the comments a lot.

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It's an issue that we all
have to deal with every day

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and it's: How I Learned
To Love My Mom Bod.

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Really excited to talk about this.

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So first, let's talk about the girls,

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'cause when you're pregnant,
your boobs get huge

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and they're just like up here

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like big perky headlights like,

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"Hello baby on the way."

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and then as soon as the baby comes out

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they just kind of deflate
like sad birthday balloons.

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You know when you like,
your kid insists on keeping

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them in their room for
like a month and a half

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and they're just like barely floating.

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But the way I think about it now is,

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I kept two humans alive with these.

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Literally these things
kept two humans alive.

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They have accomplished so much.

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So you know what, I'm
gonna let 'em retire.

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They did their job.

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I'm gonna give 'em a
break for a little bit.

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So this ones for you.

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I appreciate you.

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Next, tiger claws.

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Instead of getting like the
typical tiger claw stretch marks

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around my belly I got this
weird solo stretch mark right

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above my belly button that
like stretched out into a V.

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And it's like, I'll show you.

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Come.

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Come closer don't be shy.

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It's like kinda weird.

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And I was so embarrassed by it

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that for the longest time
after I had my first,

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I would not even wear a bathing suit

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like a two-piece bathing suit.

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I realized that, first of all
I'm not going to the beach

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for like some model photo shoot,

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so who gives a crap if
I have the perfect body.

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Second, I'm not there for
anyone else's viewing pleasure,

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like we're all there to
just go to the beach.

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And three that mark

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is the only reminder I have on my body

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of the fact that I had both
of my children in there.

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It's mind boggling to look at them now

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and see how huge they are

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and look down at my little stretch mark

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and remember that this
is where they came from.

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It's our badge of honor.

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It's beautiful.

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Next, the pooch.

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When your stomach has been
stretched out to about here,

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there's gonna be some extra skin.

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Every mom's stomach is
not going to be the same

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as it was before they had children,

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that's just a fact.

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Yeah my stomach is a lot
softer than it used to be,

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but let's be honest I never
had a six pack to begin with.

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And as soon as you have the baby,

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there's all this pressure from the media

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and peers and strangers
to lose the baby weight.

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I don't know why that's even
a priority to other people

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who have not even had this baby.

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New moms are the most
exhausted people on the planet,

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so for them to try to focus
on like exerting more energy

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to try to lose weight is ridiculous.

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So let's give them a break.

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New moms don't have to focus
on losing the baby weight,

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just worry about keeping the child alive

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and yourself alive.

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How 'bout that?

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So keep your baby weight, who cares?

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Seriously, you look good.

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Cheers.

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Next, the hoohah because
I'm five years old

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and I don't like talking about privates.

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Still it baffles me that I am
still asked by so many people,

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do the parts go back together
the way that they were?

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Duh!

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Back in the olden, olden, olden days

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children did not survive very well,

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so women were supposed
to have multiple kids.

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That means this thing,
closes right back up.

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Maybe not our tummies, but
down there does just fine.

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And I checked with a man.

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Ask my husband.

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Don't ask my husband, that's weird.

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So there's a comment that I
get all the time in person

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and in the comments of these
videos and it's always,

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"You look amazing for
having had two kids."

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and for the longest time
there was this ugly voice

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in the back of my head that would say,

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"Oh, you're only looking
good for having two kids.

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"You don't look good for a normal person."

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Something that was meant
to be a compliment,

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would make me feel badly about myself.

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I felt like my only body identity was mom.

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I realized, I of course my
body identity should be a mom

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because I birthed two
children and that's amazing.

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And to any of you guys who
feel like you have all this

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pressure on you to look
perfect or look a certain way

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or feeling bad about anything
that is happened to you

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as a result of having your child,

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you gotta stop.

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What you've done is the most
incredible accomplishment

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that I could ever think of.

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Like literally building a human.

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Like you made a brain.

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Just in the fact that
there was a brain in there

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that you made that's crazy.

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And honestly if you're feeling
badly, turn off the TV.

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Turn off the computer.

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Turn off this crappy media
that's making us feel

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like we're supposed to look a certain way

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or we're supposed be a certain way.

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That's completely
unrealistic and unattainable.

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Life is way too short
to spend another second

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hating your body.

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And I am so freaking
passionate about this,

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I'm about to start crying,
I'm not even joking.

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I love my mom bod.

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I love your mom bod.

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You should love your mom bod,

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so let's celebrate them.

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Let's show them off to the world

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because fuck what everyone,

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I shouldn't say the f-word,

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but fuck what anyone else thinks!

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Seriously, fuck that!

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We're beautiful and we should
celebrate with lots of wine.

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And bathing suits.

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So that's all I got for today.

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I'm Hannah, your friendly
neighborhood wine mom.

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And I know I got a little
bit passionate there,

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but this is just something
that I care so much about.

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I just wanna like reach through
the screen and hug you all.

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One of those long awkward hugs

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that you're like patting
me on the back being like,

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"Okay, okay."

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So I wanna hear in the comments about

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why you love your mom bod

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and what you love about your mom bod

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because they're beautiful

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and it's time we take over the dad bods

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'cause it's all about the mom
bod because we're awesome.

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And we rock and you're all
beautiful and I love you.

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So cheers.

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'Til next time.

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(jazzy music)

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Oh sweet barrel wine.

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Sweet barrel wine!