WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en 00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:02.083 (cheerful orchestral music) 00:00:02.083 --> 00:00:05.701 (upbeat rock music) 00:00:05.701 --> 00:00:06.873 - [Zack] John Smith. 00:00:06.880 --> 00:00:07.591 - [Justin] Boring. 00:00:07.591 --> 00:00:09.243 - Just like his name, boring. 00:00:09.243 --> 00:00:11.002 - I think John Smith is real smelly. 00:00:11.002 --> 00:00:13.580 Got some smegma buildup, I'm not (bleep) John Smith. 00:00:13.580 --> 00:00:15.896 - When you come from a family of racists, 00:00:15.896 --> 00:00:18.455 it's hard to change, but he changes. 00:00:18.455 --> 00:00:19.308 - Which is hot. 00:00:19.308 --> 00:00:21.161 - Boring, next. 00:00:21.161 --> 00:00:23.279 - [Chris] Prince from Snow White looks like Liza Minnelli. 00:00:23.279 --> 00:00:25.613 - Yeah, he does look like a porcelain doll. 00:00:25.613 --> 00:00:26.989 - He looks like a child. 00:00:26.989 --> 00:00:29.130 - He looks like Kris Jenner, I wouldn't do it. 00:00:29.130 --> 00:00:32.468 ♫ Hello, Cinderella, I'm here ♫ 00:00:32.468 --> 00:00:33.650 - I don't know but he's got the 00:00:33.650 --> 00:00:35.103 swagger of someone that's hung. 00:00:35.103 --> 00:00:38.048 - Would you let him suck your dick? 00:00:38.048 --> 00:00:38.916 - No. 00:00:38.916 --> 00:00:40.447 - I would (bleep) Prince Charming. 00:00:40.447 --> 00:00:41.487 - [Chris] Prince Phillip's dressed 00:00:41.487 --> 00:00:43.017 like it's easy season three. 00:00:43.017 --> 00:00:44.252 - Dude, he looks like Bieber. 00:00:44.252 --> 00:00:46.016 - He looks just like Bieber. 00:00:46.016 --> 00:00:47.496 - He's giving me a half chubby best. 00:00:47.496 --> 00:00:48.367 - Would you? 00:00:48.367 --> 00:00:51.189 - Would I wake up from a deep slumber from his kiss? 00:00:51.189 --> 00:00:52.077 Maybe. 00:00:52.077 --> 00:00:53.558 Li Shang. 00:00:53.558 --> 00:00:55.716 - I gotta say, by Asian standards, 00:00:55.716 --> 00:00:57.248 this guy's not a good-looking guy. 00:00:57.248 --> 00:00:58.119 - What? 00:00:58.119 --> 00:00:59.095 - He's too strong for me. 00:00:59.095 --> 00:01:01.498 - I would feel turned on if he thought I was hot. 00:01:01.498 --> 00:01:03.030 - We'd have great test tube babies. 00:01:03.030 --> 00:01:04.492 - Oh, you know what, though? 00:01:04.492 --> 00:01:05.648 He is rockin' the man bun, 00:01:05.648 --> 00:01:07.646 which is before its time. - [Zack] Yeah, that's cool. 00:01:07.646 --> 00:01:08.847 - [Keith] It's hard to judge an animal 00:01:08.847 --> 00:01:10.644 on its hotness, but let's try. 00:01:10.644 --> 00:01:12.543 - I think Beast is hotter. 00:01:12.543 --> 00:01:14.421 - See the claws, see the teeth? 00:01:14.421 --> 00:01:16.181 - You don't like it rough, Rodney? 00:01:16.181 --> 00:01:18.741 - Not like that, man, I wanna walk away from my experience. 00:01:18.741 --> 00:01:20.190 - Is this guy a ging? 00:01:20.190 --> 00:01:21.579 - Yeah, it's crazy that Disney made 00:01:21.579 --> 00:01:23.511 the bold choice of making him a ging. 00:01:23.511 --> 00:01:26.147 I prefer the Beast to Prince Adam. 00:01:26.147 --> 00:01:28.051 - I'll tell you that he is the most ideal 00:01:28.051 --> 00:01:29.798 cuddle partner in the Disney universe. 00:01:29.798 --> 00:01:31.661 Flynn Rider, Tangled. 00:01:31.661 --> 00:01:32.661 - [Rodney] No. 00:01:32.661 --> 00:01:34.503 - I don't know about this chin scruff. 00:01:34.503 --> 00:01:35.893 - No, he looks almost evil. 00:01:35.893 --> 00:01:36.887 That's a thing. - [Zack] No. 00:01:36.887 --> 00:01:38.188 Look it, that guy looks evil? 00:01:38.188 --> 00:01:39.679 That guy's a freakin' dreamboat. 00:01:39.679 --> 00:01:41.113 - [Zach] I don't fight people, but he seems 00:01:41.113 --> 00:01:43.902 like someone that I would want to get into a fight with. 00:01:43.902 --> 00:01:44.929 - 100 percent. 00:01:44.929 --> 00:01:48.071 - He looks like a cross between you and me though. 00:01:48.071 --> 00:01:49.319 - Oh, I get that. 00:01:49.319 --> 00:01:50.728 - Kristoff is definitely not hot. 00:01:50.728 --> 00:01:52.069 He's a little chubby German boy. 00:01:52.069 --> 00:01:53.461 "Mama, I want more chocolate." 00:01:53.461 --> 00:01:55.464 - He looks like everyone I know from Minnesota. 00:01:55.464 --> 00:01:56.213 - I'm more into 00:01:56.213 --> 00:01:57.258 Olaf than Kristoff. - [Rodney] I'm not. 00:01:57.258 --> 00:01:58.616 - [Justin] They gave him the shaggy hair 00:01:58.616 --> 00:01:59.992 'cause he's in this cold environment. 00:01:59.992 --> 00:02:01.657 Why didn't they just give him a beard? 00:02:01.657 --> 00:02:02.872 - Because he's too young. - [Justin] That's interesting, 00:02:02.872 --> 00:02:04.671 dude, they'd never give Disney characters 00:02:04.671 --> 00:02:06.971 a beard 'cause it looks creepy. 00:02:07.981 --> 00:02:09.982 - [Kevin] He looks pretty handsome, I'd fuck him for sure. 00:02:09.982 --> 00:02:11.969 - He's charming, he's got a sense of humor, 00:02:11.969 --> 00:02:13.765 delightful accent, and he plays music. 00:02:13.765 --> 00:02:14.757 He's hot. 00:02:14.757 --> 00:02:16.378 - He is nicely build, but he's 00:02:16.378 --> 00:02:19.773 not (bleep) huge like John Smith. 00:02:19.773 --> 00:02:22.019 - How do these people find so much time to work out? 00:02:22.019 --> 00:02:23.916 - [Zach] Eric's hot. 00:02:23.916 --> 00:02:27.375 - I question his motives 'cause when you wanna... 00:02:27.375 --> 00:02:28.288 - Hook up with a fish? 00:02:28.288 --> 00:02:29.453 - With a fish, that's weird. 00:02:29.453 --> 00:02:31.283 - If you introduced me to your new boyfriend 00:02:31.283 --> 00:02:35.027 and he looked like Prince Eric, I wouldn't trust him. 00:02:35.027 --> 00:02:36.708 - No, he's got blue eyes and black hair. 00:02:36.708 --> 00:02:38.501 - He's got a dog, he's romantic. 00:02:38.501 --> 00:02:40.608 - Also, how come his dog couldn't talk 00:02:40.608 --> 00:02:42.384 but all the sea animals could talk? 00:02:42.384 --> 00:02:44.439 - Aladdin wins me over 'cause he's a 00:02:44.439 --> 00:02:47.384 "started from the bottom, now we're here" kinda dude. 00:02:47.384 --> 00:02:48.462 - Definitely the best. 00:02:48.462 --> 00:02:50.814 - I think Aladdin's more cute than he is hot. 00:02:50.814 --> 00:02:52.450 Look at him, look it, that's cute. 00:02:52.450 --> 00:02:53.686 - I'd go on that magic carpet ride 00:02:53.686 --> 00:02:55.271 and I would not dare close my eyes. 00:02:55.271 --> 00:02:57.168 - I say you settle down with Aladdin. 00:02:57.168 --> 00:02:58.823 - And he knows how to rub a lamp. 00:02:58.823 --> 00:03:00.286 - I got a pretty big lamp too. 00:03:00.286 --> 00:03:03.448 - I have an accessible and moderately-sized lamp. 00:03:03.448 --> 00:03:04.431 - I want to see a Disney movie 00:03:04.431 --> 00:03:06.151 where two peasants fall in love 00:03:06.151 --> 00:03:07.721 and neither of 'em become rich. 00:03:07.721 --> 00:03:08.766 - Yeah, why do they always 00:03:08.766 --> 00:03:09.872 gotta be a prince - [Justin] Yeah, why? 00:03:09.872 --> 00:03:11.480 - [Zack] or a princess, why can't it 00:03:11.480 --> 00:03:13.779 just be like, "Hey, I'm a banker"?