- If I work with you,
I do not want to hear from you online, ever.
- Ever!
("Return to You")
- Terry, I know that we both sit next to each other,
but it's assigned seating, I didn't choose that.
So, when you come up to me and say,
"Hey, that barbecue looked fun,"
that's not the way you score an invite.
I'm starting to get bummed out, Terry.
- Wanda, stop asking me to play Trivia Crack with you.
I don't play games on Facebook, neither should you.
- Mr. McShane, of course I saw your friend request.
But if I accept that, that's the equivalent
of me just barging into your home
and just asking to get fired.
And I can't do that
'cause I really need this job, like badly.
- Someone named Donovan, I just accepted your request.
I don't know who you are.
I'm gonna assume, based on our mutual friends,
we work together.
Just be chill.
- Jen, 'sup?
I really liked your new profile picture.
- Wait, cute Jen?
- Yeah, from reception.
- Damn, she hasn't accepted my request yet.
- Sucks to suck.
- The rest of you, we see each other enough as it is.
- When I go home, I just wanna see a curated life
my friends are pretending to live,
not your face again, Neil.
- Which is why we're starting the hashtag
#DontTalkToMe.
- If we have the same signature
at the bottom of our checks--
- If our only real life social interaction
is you asking if I saw Game of Thrones--
- If I choose not to see you
on a day that begins with the letter "S"--
- Hashtag--
- [Both] DontTalkToMe.
- Thank you.
See you Monday.