WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en 00:00:00.143 --> 00:00:01.698 - Hey! Sorry I'm late. 00:00:01.698 --> 00:00:02.860 - That's okay. 00:00:02.860 --> 00:00:04.392 - Has the match already started? 00:00:04.392 --> 00:00:06.992 - Game, not match. 00:00:06.992 --> 00:00:08.665 Is that white wine? 00:00:08.665 --> 00:00:11.655 - Yeah, should I have brought red? 00:00:11.846 --> 00:00:15.904 (dramatic opera music) 00:00:17.755 --> 00:00:20.490 (muffled yells and groans) 00:00:21.911 --> 00:00:24.646 (television game announcement) 00:00:27.438 --> 00:00:29.133 - Oh. Not in my house. 00:00:29.133 --> 00:00:30.154 Can I get a re-rack? 00:00:30.154 --> 00:00:32.197 - Dude, you are missing the entire game in there. 00:00:32.197 --> 00:00:35.238 - Hey, I will come in at the commercials. 00:00:35.238 --> 00:00:37.143 - I'm guessing this isn't really your scene? 00:00:37.143 --> 00:00:40.115 - Being a non-sports fan in this town here kinda sucks. 00:00:40.565 --> 00:00:41.790 (indistinguishable conversation) 00:00:41.790 --> 00:00:43.208 When people are talking about the game, 00:00:43.208 --> 00:00:45.112 they might as well be speaking another language. 00:00:45.112 --> 00:00:46.087 - Two TDs, that's a fantasy team. 00:00:46.087 --> 00:00:46.946 - Redskins on D. 00:00:46.946 --> 00:00:48.245 - Hey, you know who's on my fantasy team? 00:00:48.245 --> 00:00:48.920 - Huh? 00:00:48.920 --> 00:00:50.917 - J.R.R. Tolkien. 00:00:50.917 --> 00:00:52.240 - Did you get him off the waiver ware? 00:00:52.240 --> 00:00:53.841 - When you tell people you don't watch sports, 00:00:53.841 --> 00:00:55.375 they just think you're weird. 00:00:55.375 --> 00:00:56.465 Yeah, my family just didn't watch 00:00:56.465 --> 00:00:57.720 that much sports growing up. 00:00:57.720 --> 00:00:59.810 - Did you not have a TV or something? 00:00:59.810 --> 00:01:02.660 - (stammering) I did. 00:01:02.660 --> 00:01:04.378 Or they think you're an idiot. 00:01:04.378 --> 00:01:06.491 - Gentlemen, we are going to need 00:01:06.491 --> 00:01:08.534 a full court press on this, okay. 00:01:08.534 --> 00:01:11.414 Chris, full court press, it's a basketball analogy. 00:01:11.414 --> 00:01:14.572 It's where you pick up your opponent at the baseline. 00:01:14.572 --> 00:01:16.123 It just means added effort. 00:01:16.123 --> 00:01:18.031 - [Voiceover] Sometimes, I'll just pretend to be interested 00:01:18.031 --> 00:01:19.680 so people don't hassle me. 00:01:20.100 --> 00:01:21.740 - Are you serious? 00:01:21.740 --> 00:01:24.153 Flacco threw more that 4,000 yards last season. 00:01:24.153 --> 00:01:25.385 - You're gonna look me in the eyes 00:01:25.385 --> 00:01:26.964 and tell me that he's a better quarterback 00:01:26.964 --> 00:01:28.054 than Andrew Luck? 00:01:28.054 --> 00:01:28.983 - Oh. 00:01:28.983 --> 00:01:31.260 - Tom Brady. 00:01:31.260 --> 00:01:32.071 - It's a good point. 00:01:32.071 --> 00:01:33.907 - No, yeah, that makes sense. 00:01:33.907 --> 00:01:35.300 - But, why do you hate sports? 00:01:35.300 --> 00:01:37.738 - I mean, playing sports is fine. 00:01:37.738 --> 00:01:40.803 But watching sports is boring. 00:01:40.803 --> 00:01:44.029 It has absolutely no impact on anyone's life. 00:01:44.029 --> 00:01:46.375 - But House of Swords does? 00:01:46.375 --> 00:01:48.929 (upbeat medieval flute music) 00:01:48.929 --> 00:01:51.041 - House of Swords is totally different. 00:01:51.041 --> 00:01:52.272 That is characters. 00:01:52.272 --> 00:01:53.364 That is storytelling. 00:01:53.364 --> 00:01:55.709 That is raw, human emotion. 00:01:55.709 --> 00:01:57.219 - So are sports. 00:01:57.219 --> 00:01:59.657 It's the narrative, the team, the players. 00:01:59.657 --> 00:02:01.793 Dynasties rising and falling. 00:02:01.793 --> 00:02:04.067 Fortunes won and lost in an instant. 00:02:04.067 --> 00:02:05.949 Sports give us community, 00:02:05.949 --> 00:02:06.877 Identity, 00:02:06.877 --> 00:02:07.759 and let's face it, 00:02:07.759 --> 00:02:10.523 sports have the best parties. 00:02:10.523 --> 00:02:12.867 - [Voiceover] They're basically tribal cults, 00:02:12.867 --> 00:02:14.795 like nationalism. 00:02:14.795 --> 00:02:16.632 They cause fights, 00:02:16.632 --> 00:02:18.026 riots, 00:02:18.026 --> 00:02:19.257 chaos. 00:02:19.257 --> 00:02:20.998 It's medieval, 00:02:20.998 --> 00:02:22.925 and not in a good, House of Swords way. 00:02:22.925 --> 00:02:24.040 - [Voiceover] Exactly. 00:02:24.040 --> 00:02:27.267 Society needs that primal release. 00:02:27.267 --> 00:02:29.380 You just don't like watching sports, 00:02:29.380 --> 00:02:31.772 because you aren't willing to face the truth, 00:02:31.772 --> 00:02:35.231 that human beings are just animals. 00:02:35.231 --> 00:02:36.625 - No, I just- 00:02:36.625 --> 00:02:39.289 (stammering) 00:02:39.852 --> 00:02:41.431 I just don't understand why anyone would get so worked up 00:02:41.431 --> 00:02:43.289 over something that doesn't even matter. 00:02:43.289 --> 00:02:44.890 (singing) House of Swords, House of Swords, Sunday night, 00:02:44.890 --> 00:02:46.981 House of Swords. 00:02:46.981 --> 00:02:48.443 Run, you little bitch, run. 00:02:48.443 --> 00:02:49.744 Get out of the cave! 00:02:49.744 --> 00:02:51.439 God, the effects are always great, 00:02:51.439 --> 00:02:52.738 and when the ravens just coming out-- 00:02:52.738 --> 00:02:54.735 - The Ravens, Baltimore Ravens? 00:02:54.735 --> 00:02:56.383 - Wait a minute, you don't watch House of Swords? 00:02:56.383 --> 00:02:58.590 - No, I fell asleep during the pilot. 00:02:58.590 --> 00:03:00.889 - This is the most important thing in culture right now. 00:03:00.889 --> 00:03:02.235 - Such a good show! 00:03:02.235 --> 00:03:05.439 It is exciting, and it is heart-wrenching. 00:03:05.439 --> 00:03:07.831 There's a new world you get to look in. 00:03:07.831 --> 00:03:09.828 - Why does everyone wear a vest? 00:03:09.828 --> 00:03:12.382 - Because that's their uniforms. 00:03:12.382 --> 00:03:15.076 Oh my god, it is just like sports. 00:03:15.076 --> 00:03:17.973 (upbeat medieval flute music) 00:03:20.851 --> 00:03:21.989 You guys like Gatorade? 00:03:21.989 --> 00:03:22.987 - I do. 00:03:22.987 --> 00:03:24.636 - Gatorade's pretty sick. 00:03:24.636 --> 00:03:25.613 - It's got electrolytes.