It keeps staring at me, like it wants to party with me.

It keeps staring at me, like it wants to work with me.

It keeps staring at me, like it wants to compete with me.

It keeps staring at me, like it's straining to tolerate me.

It keeps staring at me, like it hates the unfashionable garb covering me.

It keeps staring at me, with drunken wobbly eyes going all over the place!

Can you guess what it is?

Yes, that's right!

It's my college dorm mate!