♪♪
[creatures chattering]
[camera clicks] I didn't vote for 'er.
[door opens] I got here as soon as I could,
but Friendship Ambassador has been a full-time job these days.
Making peace between Abyssinians and the Diamond Dogs has not been easy.
God Spike, you're such a little bitch.
But I'm glad you could cum.
Oh, what's up cash money hoe?
Talk like a zigger in my presence again, and I'll banish you to the sun.
Anyway, it seems my top student is in need of sexual re-education.
What do you mean?
Let's just say it'll be good to have my royal slave and friendship cock-sleeve by my side.
Your Majesty, my feet hurt!
Shut the fuck up, peasent.
[door opens]
Your Cuntliness.
Luster, I may be the ruler of Equestria, but I'm still just your teacher.
And you've been flutter-wonderful.
I've enjoyed every moment in the School of Magic.
But, I-I'm just not sure it's the right place for me.
I see.
But Princess, it's not just the work. I could spend weeks in the library doing research.
No problem! It's just that there's a lot of focus on making friends.
If that's your problem, you've come to the right place.
But that's just it. All my friends are imaginary.
What? [clears throat, coughs]
So you'd rather leave the School of Magic than make friends?
I was hoping to set-up an independent course of study.
I want to accomplish as much as you have some day.
It'll be hard to do that without friends.
I'm not so sure.
Friendship looks more like a distraction than anything else
and, ultimately, a waste of time.
What?!
I know you and your friends have accomplished a lot together.
But, Princess, is that a piece of pizza that's been deep fried?
Uhh, hello? Royal advisor right here!
And I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
In fact, I think it's better!
Plus, if friendships ultimately fade,
why even make them in the first place?
You know what, Luster Dawn?
You're right.
THE FUCK?!
♪ My Little Pony ♪
♪ Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ♪
♪ My Little Pony ♪
♪ I used to wonder what friendship could be ♪
♪ My Little Pony ♪
♪ Until you all shared its magic with me ♪
♪ Big adventures ♪
♪ Tons of fun ♪
♪ A beautiful slut ♪
♪ background pony ♪
♪ Fucking animals ♪
♪ Sucking feet ♪
♪ Now here comes the best pony ♪
♪ You have My Little Pony ♪
♪ Do you know ponies are my only friends ever and without them I'd totally have kms myself years ago ♪
♪ and also they aren't saying france ♪
[coughing] Snap into a Slim Jim.
Friendship's more trouble than it's worth?
This is your top whore?
Friendship takes study!
You need to study harder!
It can be complicated.
It can be messy.
And they never go the way you planned.
Friendship is a hard thing to navigate.
I remember the first time I realized it might not last forever.
[Twilight panting and yelping]
Twilight?
Uh, I'm pretty sure that's everything.
Have you seen my human dildo, Spike?
But we did a final check.
Of every room.
Twice.
Ah hah!
See? An issue of Playpony.
Now aren't ya glad we triple checked?
Thanks, but...I've already read this one.
I don't need to take it to Canterlot.
No no no, you love inflation porn.
We're taking it.
Really, Twi, a we-a don't have to-a bring tha comic.
I'm a-not a-be sure how much a-longer I collect 'em.
And either way, this is a-real weeb-a sheet-a.
Just because things change doesn't mean you leave everything you love behind!
[sighs, face-box]
You're not still worried about ruling Equestria. Are you?
No. I know it took some time, but Spike...
please keep your dirty hands off me.
Just because I'm ready to be a pretty pony princess
doesn't mean I'm ready to leave Ponyville. [sniffles]
When we were all fighting to save Equestria from Tirek, Chrysalis, and Cozy Glow,
I didn't have time to think about it.
And now it's all happening at once.
What is?
The coronation, moving, leaving our friends.
I thought we'd all be ruling Equestria together.
Of course we will. But it won't be the same.
They all have their lives here.
We're moving away and they're not.
And I can't help but feel like we're leaving them behind.
What if we all just...drift apart?
Well of course Twilight.
You're an alicorn so you'll see all of them wither and die.
You should talk with them while you can.
You're a fag, Spike.
Sometimes talking to a good friend is all it takes. [noogies non-sexually]
[crates closing] [stamping]
Soooo, you're not worried about how things might change
with me living in Canterlot?
Sheeit, of course not.
Change is natural, just like the seasons.
That's just life, cracka.
Uhhh, I guess so.
Anywho, I really need to get all these boxes packed and sorted
There's a lot more work now that
folks beyond Equestria are coming to the coronation, too.
Worried? Phbbt!
No way!
Unless your talking about the coronation.
Because then, yes.
Obviously the cakes are handled.
But there's the whole rest of the party to stay on top of.
[conspiratorially] And honestly, I'm not convinced Gummy really took care of the fireworks.
[sparkler sizzling]
But what about after the coronation?
Don't you think things are gonna be...different?
Well since I'll be in charge of all the Canterlot galas from now on,
I'll have to go there a lot more.
So, I guess that's different.
But I don't mind.
No...of course not.
[birds chirping]
[doves cooing]
Wonderful work everyone!
We couldn't be more ready.
Josephine, if you and the rest of the doves
leave now, we should all arrive in Canterlot at the same time.
[doves cooing]
Eloise and Hubert, you should go, too.
[swans honking] I know it's a long way, but don't worry.
I'll bring plenty of snacks to restore your energy before we perform.
[swans honking]
Everyone else gets to ride
since the trip's too much for your little wings.
We need everyone in tip-top shape for the coronation.
I'm glad we got the chance for one last rehearsal.
Everyone's so excited!
But I can't imagine anypony's more excited than you!
Moving in Canterlot.
Being crowned.
I can't think of a single bad thing about any of it!
[nervous chuckle] Yeah, me neither.
In three, two, one, aaaaand...
[whooshing]
[smacking]
[zooming]
[soft thud]
Hey yo, Rainbow Dash,
uh I know this routine's like a big freakin' deal for ya and everythin',
but uh does it all really gotta be so, you know, loop da loopy?
Know what I'm sayin'?
Of course.
And I know we can pull it off.
Uh sorry, Twilight.
I don't have time to talk.
We got a lots more work to do before the coronation.
[sighs dejectedly]
Dahling, in fashion you must embrace change.
I myself am opening boutiques to bring some class for those lesser, uhm, non-pony races.
It's like a charity of sort.
For example...
I was just struck with a sudden inspiration to change my design for your gown.
By including the webs of these star spiders!
They glow for a short while after they've spun!
They won't have much time to weave the sash, but the effect will be dazzling!
You see, dahling, change can be fabulous if you embrace it.
[doors open]
Anon is supposed to come over soon.
He said something about helping to relieve your stress before we leave.
You know hwat?
I think you're right, Twilight.
I should take my porn mags to Canterlot.
We can't leave the Playpony behind.
[jive talk mumbling]
(Applejack) Alright, Twilight.
(Applejack) Are you ready?
We all wanted to see you off
but there's just so much to do!
(Applejack) Friendship wrap-up, friendship wrap-up (Spike) Aren't you cooming on the train?
I'm gonna kick your ass.
Apple apple apple.
Wah hah hah hah.
And I'm gonna meet the Wonderbolts so we can go over the routine one last time.
I'm goin' with Gummy, bud. He said he he knows when the fireworks display starts.
But uh does anypony actually believe that?
And I still need to pick up food for the swans and doves who flew ahead to Canterlot.
If I don't get them fed, they'll be too pooped to perform.
Well, I'll be living in Canterlot alone.
Might as well take the train alone, too.
Bye, faggots.
(Rarity) Oh? You won't be travelling alone, dahling.
I'll have just enough time on the train to weave that star spider sash for your gown.
But, we should leave now.
There's no time to sperg around if you want to make your coronation on time.
That's the problem!
You're all so worried about making my coronation perfect,
that I'm leaving Ponyville and none of you even care!
[gasp]
Exactly. You moved away, your friends didn't care, and that was that.
Actually, not exactly.
Of course we care about your moving, Twilight!
I can't believe you think we don't.
What could possibly make you think that?
I tried to talk to you all about how I was feeling,
but you seemed more worried about what you had to do for the furry convention!
It's true, I was there.
I suppose it gave us something... ...uhm, well, you're not wrong, dahling.
I know we don't like everything about the time-skip.
Uh I guess, if we consider it as uncanon like season 8 and 9, I'll be fine.
I was just trying to make you feel better.
That way I wouldn't feel so terrible.
Before I moved to Ponyville, I didn't really know what friendship was.
You've all taught me so much.
I can't believe it might all be ending.
But when I imagine the future, I- all I can think about is we won't be together!
I'm literally moving away from you and it's terrifying!
I'm scared, too.
Me, too.
Apples to the core!
Ehhhhhhh.
Pff, I'm feelin' fine.
Buuut, I guess I can pretend to be sad if it'll make you pussies feel better.
Yeah.
[crying] I'm gonna miss you so much!
[crying] I just can't stop thinking about how much things are going to change.
What if we don't see each other, Applejack?
[crying] What if we don't talk as much?
[crying] We will, Rainbow!
[crying]
(Applejack) I'm crying on the outside, Twilight!
[crying]
With pathetic losers like you as friends, I don't have to worry about that.
That's nice, but you should be more worried about missing the train to Canterlot!
[doors open]
Pardon my tardiness, I've been sucking Trixie's clit for the past hou- OH!
(Spike) There's no time!
[thuds]
[train whistles]
Oh no! We miss it!
But maybe...
[teleportation zap]
Oh fuck [incoherent] God fucking damn it!
Nyx is certainly a better representation of the board than Anonfilly.
Also, spiders.
I hope Big Mac learned how to read on his own.
I assume this contain the finest dragon dildos.
Eeyup!
Ah the Applejack dakis I ordered!
I can't wait to try them out.
These are the dakis, right?
Uhhhh...eeyup?
[gasps] I don't have the snacks the doves and swans will need to perform after their long flight.
I better find the food car.
[star spiders hiss] [hummingbirds tweet]
And I need to meet the Wow Patrol.
[zooming]
Where's the mariachi band?
W-well, uhm th-they waited.
B-but when you didn't show, th-they just thought you must've meant to meet outside of Canterlot.
[growls]
The only thing I'm worried about is Gummy handling the rabid niggers.
Buuut I'm sure it's fine.
[nervous chuckle]
Well, it could always be worse.
[breaks squeal]
[sheep bleating]
[doors open]
[Twilight Sparkle panting]
Goodness Twilight, are you alright?
My friends and I had a few hiccoughs along the way. But everything's fine now.
[sheep bleats]
Bruh.
We really are both just so proud of you.
If you need a moment, that's alright.
It is your coronation.
[trumpet fanfare]
Although it would be nice to get started.
Are you ready?
(Rarity) NOOOOOOO!!!!
She can't possibly be crowned without a coronation gown!!!
Very well.
(Celestia) Citizens of Equestria and inferior creatures!
[crowd cheering]
[yaks smashing]
[dragons breathing fire]
My sister and I have raped a lot of ponies.
But even we know the law will eventually catch up to us.
(Celestia) And though it might hurt a little at first,
(Celestia) it's really just as natural as the rising and setting of the sun and the moon,
(Celestia) both of which my sister and I love doing
(Celestia) while balls deep in an unwilling mare. (Rarity) Yeah, that looks good. Check out the ass. Yeah
You look amazing.
Oh! I almost forgot!
(Celestia) And so, without further ado, I give you the new ruler of Equestria.
Princess Twilight Sparkle!
Oh fuck! [yelps, thuds]
[crowd screams in horror]
Sorry.
[magic surges]
[crowd ooh's]
Uhhh, TWI?!
[birds tweet]
[spiders hiss]
Oh dear.
I know these aren't the snacks I promised, but we all got shit to deal with so tough it out, k?
[angry swan noises]
Well, Dash or no Dash,
Twilight's about to get that crown.
Wonderbolts, roll out!
[zooming]
No! God damn it, Sptifire! [zooming]
[fireworks exploding]
[swan honks]
Waaaaaa!
[crowd gasps]
To Twilight!
[splats]
[crowd murmuring confusedly]
Uh, close enough.
[groans]
Oh, I get it now.
Your coronation was such a disastrous clusterfuck,
that all your friends immediately disowned you to distance themselves from the shame.
Well...you're half right.
So the coronation wasn't a disaster?
And your friendships just fade away over time?
[inhales] Ohh, about that...
[door opens]
[sighs] Sorry I'm late.
But it is so hard to find a sitter with a sense of humor for Little Cheese.
[Boneless 6 squeaking]
(Rarity) Honestly, I would have been here sooner.
But you wouldn't even believe how war-torn Yakistan is these days.
[Rainbow Dash] Maybe shipfags are right
and offering to do some of your chores means we're constantly eatin' each other out.
Maybe shipfags are just lonely and gay.
Oh. [chuckles] Sorry.
Didn't mean to ruin your fun.
Oh, they're totally fucking.
Well I assumed that since you went hunting ziggers...
That they all died?
[laughing]
That's not the point of my story.
It's true my coronation was a disaster.
[gulps]
Well, at least season nine is over.
[groans, fwops]
[laughing]
That was a penis.
I was just about to say the same thing.
I know maybe it wasn't the coronation you planned,
but it's good to see all of you laughing.
We wanted to give this to you before you left Ponyville,
but things got a little hectic.
Since you're moving away, we thought, if you missed any of us or Ponyville, this might help.
Awwwwww
It's the episode master file.
And we all chipped in some.
No matter our mortal deaths, you'll always have this to look back on.
I love it!
Thank you so much!
But I don't want to only look back.
Obviously the coronation wasn't perfect, but that doesn't matter.
It's our relationships that really count.
And we have to maintain them.
But now that we'll be living in different places, I'm not exactly sure how.
I am!
I suggest we meet once a month.
In fact, my first royal decree as ruler of Equestria is to establish this Council of Autism!
(Applejack) That's a no from me, sugarcube. [the rest cheer]
(Celestia) And what a wonderful raping it is.
We always knew that whatever adversity you faced, you and your friends would find your way through it together.
We know Equestria is in the perfect hoofs with you and your friends looking out for it.
And while we'll always be here if you need us,
Jeffrey Epstein didn't kill himself.
Fuck!
We hope you'll come and visit us in Fondle Foals.
But now it's time for you to masturbate on your own.
You're all more than capable.
I'm gonna miss the smell of your flanks.
Mmmmmm. [giggles]
[hugging sounds]
So even though everything changed and you moved away from your friends,
you didn't grow apart?
And this is the Council of Friendship?
Well that's what you're all doing here?
Duh! This time every moon.
Heh, what she means is, is this is how we've been ruling together.
And how we've continued to face every
(heavy distortion) problem and threat to Equestria over the years.
But mostly, it's how we keep in touch.
No matter how busy life gets.
Sometimes friendships can be hard.
And it takes work to maintain them.
But without friends, things can be a lot harder.
I never thought about friendship being something to work at.
And I don't mind work.
I guess if they don't have to fade away,
maybe making friends isn't the waste of time I thought.
But [sighs] I've been so focused on my studies, I wouldn't know where to start.
That's alright. I know you're gonna carry that weight.
♪♪
♪ When I started out ♪
♪ I was unsure ♪
♪ I thought I knew all that I needed ♪
♪ Didn't know what to expect ♪
♪ But when my walls came down ♪
♪ I saw the truth ♪
♪ All along something was missing ♪
♪ And I think you'll see it, too ♪
♪ This is where the magic happens ♪
♪ This is where the magic lives ♪
♪ Our friendships weave together stronger ♪
♪ The bonds grow deeper, lasting longer ♪
♪ And the greatest spell you'll know ♪
♪ Is how the magic of friendship grows ♪
♪ And no matter how much time goes by ♪
♪ The party will still be here with some fun new games to try ♪
♪ Big adventures waiting, obviously ♪
♪ As long as we're still here together ♪
♪ We'll be flying happily ♪
♪ This is where the magic happens ♪
♪ This is where the magic lives ♪
♪ Our friendships weave together stronger ♪
♪ The bonds grow deeper, lasting longer ♪
♪ And the greatest spell there is ♪
♪ What the magic of friendship gives ♪
♪ And it's something true to pass on down ♪
♪ to generations yet to coom ♪
♪ And we'll never stop believing in the generosity ♪
♪ of the friendships we've won. ♪
♪ And because the love that I feel ♪
♪ For every single living creature is something that is real ♪
♪ Friendship happens so naturally ♪
♪ Oh and how I used to wonder ♪
♪ What friendship could be ♪
♪ This is where the magic happens ♪
♪ This is where the magic lives ♪
♪ Our friendships weave together stronger ♪
♪ The bonds grow deeper, lasting longer ♪
♪ And the greatest spell you'll know ♪
♪ Is how the magic of friendship grows ♪
♪ How the magic of friendship grows ♪
[Shrek chuckles]
(Shrek) Like that's ever gonna happen.
(Shrek) What a loada- [toilet flushes]
♪ Somebody once told me ♪
♪ This board was full of pony ♪
[record scratch]
[cassette tape stops]
[cassette tape flips over]
[presses play]
♪ ♪
♪ When family cannot be here ♪
♪ Having journeyed far and wide ♪
♪ We sing a song to honor them ♪
♪ To remember days gone by ♪
♪ So take your cup and raise it high ♪
♪ Just as surely I'll do mine ♪
♪ And laugh we will at stories told ♪
♪ As we smile at days gone by ♪
[anons crying]
♪♪ [anons crying]
♪ For family not here, my dears ♪ [anons crying]
♪ Having journeyed far and wide ♪ [anons crying]
♪ For loyalty and kindness both ♪ [anons crying]
♪ We smile at days gone by ♪ [anons crying]
♪♪ [vocalizations] [anons crying]
♪ Our paths will cross again one day ♪ [anons crying]
♪ In time to reunite ♪ [anons crying]
♪ For family is always near ♪ [anons crying]
♪ Even when the seas are wide ♪ [anons crying]
♪ So take your cup and raise it high ♪ [anons crying]
♪ Just as surely I'll do mine ♪ [anons crying]
♪ And make a toast for family ♪ [anons crying]
♪ And the tales of days gone by ♪ [anons crying]
♪ For family not here, my dears ♪ [anons crying]
♪ Having journeyed far and wide ♪ [anons crying]
♪ For loyalty and kindness both ♪ [anons crying]
♪ Take joy at days gone by ♪ [anons crying]
♪ For loyalty and kindness both ♪ [anons crying]
♪ We smile at days gone by ♪ [anons crying]
(anon) I don't know, they didn't make me emotional at all.
(anon) Fuck you, Corp.
[lone anon continues crying]
♪♪ [lone anon continues crying]
♪♪ [blows nose]
♪♪ [crying fades out]
♪♪
♪ m l p ♪