WEBVTT Kind: captions Language: en-US 00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.314 Drop a banana in front of a clown and watch him slip and break his neck? 00:00:03.514 --> 00:00:08.586 # 00:00:08.724 --> 00:00:12.740 I guess we'll... I guess we'll have to castrate and then he's like "uh oh". 00:00:13.378 --> 00:00:13.878 Okay, when I said "Get your face down here", that's not quite what I meant. 00:00:25.021 --> 00:00:26.378 Bow to me. 00:00:26.603 --> 00:00:29.267 She's queen. Queen Long-Leg Trixie. 00:00:29.355 --> 00:00:32.847 She's like "Scary horse. You are my servent." 00:00:33.473 --> 00:00:34.967 And he's... he doesn't like this. 00:00:34.967 --> 00:00:39.854 He's sad because, in his civilization, height controls everything. He's like "Oh, okay." 00:00:40.117 --> 00:00:42.487 He's like "You are... you are master horse." 00:00:42.487 --> 00:00:45.341 "Go make me a sandwich." Because she's hungry. 00:00:45.779 --> 00:00:47.837 "I am... I am your master, too." 00:00:49.026 --> 00:00:51.570 "Go make Trixie more sandwiches." 00:00:52.584 --> 00:00:54.051 "Trixie hungers." 00:00:56.454 --> 00:00:58.457 That face alone. I like that. 00:00:58.717 --> 00:01:01.893 Drop a banana in front of a clown and watch him slip and break his neck? 00:01:02.056 --> 00:01:07.603 # 00:01:07.703 --> 00:01:12.950 Like "Ha! Ha! Ha! His wife and kids are going to find that hilarious!" 00:01:12.950 --> 00:01:15.455 So, ah, as a heads up for people... 00:01:15.455 --> 00:01:22.550 Nightly, who is right here, is actually going to be, as of right now at least, the editor for my Youtube. 00:01:22.550 --> 00:01:24.625 Hashtag "Help Nightly Eat". 00:01:24.625 --> 00:01:28.366 Nightly will starve without your donations. 00:01:28.366 --> 00:01:33.500 ♪ In the arms of an angel. ♪ 00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:38.249 ♪ Far away... from here. ♪ 00:01:40.802 --> 00:01:45.162 ♪ In the arms of the wreckage. ♪ 00:01:46.389 --> 00:01:49.000 ♪ For the end... ♪ 00:01:49.075 --> 00:01:51.134 So, no actually, you know what? I have a video of Nightly. 00:01:51.847 --> 00:01:54.187 "Morty, there's a mother f'n Spearow over here!" 00:01:54.187 --> 00:01:55.510 "But Rick, I don't want you to catch a Spearow." 00:01:55.510 --> 00:01:56.417 "But Rick, I don't want you to catch a Spearow." "I'm catching the God damn Spearow, Morty!" 00:01:56.417 --> 00:01:57.750 "Don't catch the Spearow, its..." "I'm catching the God damn Spearow, Morty!" 00:01:57.888 --> 00:02:04.710 So it... it was, uh, 2016 is when Pokemon Go first popped up and so everybody was playing Pokemon Go. 00:02:04.710 --> 00:02:07.365 This is 2015, so this is actually a year before. 00:02:07.365 --> 00:02:08.832 "Do it for the Vine, Morty!" "Wha... What's a Vine?" 00:02:08.832 --> 00:02:12.146 "Do it for the Vine!" "I... I don't know what a Vine is!" 00:02:12.146 --> 00:02:13.798 "Come on, Morty! Do it for the Vine!" "Oh Oh Oh!" 00:02:14.023 --> 00:02:16.211 # 00:02:16.411 --> 00:02:19.264 And it just cuts there. Ah, it's good times. 00:02:19.264 --> 00:02:22.001 Nightly is super fun, though. I love him. 00:02:22.001 --> 00:02:27.248 This one is great. It's a little bit choppy as we recorded it weird. But this is Jhaller. We tied him into a corner. 00:02:28.900 --> 00:02:29.962 "Repent!" 00:02:31.126 --> 00:02:32.677 So this is Jhaller. 00:02:33.403 --> 00:02:37.158 Repent. Repent. Repent! 00:02:37.271 --> 00:02:40.355 # 00:02:40.467 --> 00:02:45.500 I want to enjoy ponies with friends again. Like that pony. And this pony. 00:02:45.500 --> 00:02:47.649 So like... this pony? 00:02:47.649 --> 00:02:52.191 No, not that pony. That pony can jump off a... jump off a bridge. 00:02:52.191 --> 00:02:53.647 See, you made him sad. 00:02:53.647 --> 00:02:54.794 Looks angry. 00:02:54.794 --> 00:02:58.654 He's like... but no, he's sad. He's like "Why... why you do this Michael?" 00:02:58.654 --> 00:03:02.459 Maybe if you were, like, the Rule 63 version. 00:03:03.097 --> 00:03:04.507 "Like, that... that's creepy Michael." 00:03:04.507 --> 00:03:05.687 That... that's okay. 00:03:05.687 --> 00:03:09.099 "Like... like, you don't like me. Unless I castrate." 00:03:09.099 --> 00:03:12.989 And then you're like, well well, I guess... I guess we'll have to castrate. 00:03:12.989 --> 00:03:18.067 And then he's like... like "Uh oh. I like... I like being... I like being Sombra. I hate you Michael." 00:03:18.067 --> 00:03:20.403 "Oh... oh geez. Oh look at him." 00:03:21.592 --> 00:03:23.293 "I'm... he's... he's hot." 00:03:23.293 --> 00:03:24.000 "Hey baby." 00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:25.411 "Oh... oh geez he noticed me." 00:03:25.411 --> 00:03:28.214 "Do you want to... do ya wanna, like, go get, like, a sandwich?" 00:03:28.214 --> 00:03:32.808 "Take me bad boy. Oh baby oh baby. Like, I am... I am lonely." 00:03:32.808 --> 00:03:35.436 "Can... can you... can you make me a sandwich?" 00:03:35.436 --> 00:03:37.657 "I... I make the best sandwiches." 00:03:38.120 --> 00:03:40.035 "They're... they're... they're huge." 00:03:40.035 --> 00:03:41.467 "They're... they're delicious." 00:03:41.467 --> 00:03:44.246 "I... I bet your... I mean I bet your sandwiches are delicious." 00:03:44.246 --> 00:03:47.583 And then she kind of thinks about what she said and she's like "Yes." 00:03:47.721 --> 00:03:49.565 # 00:03:49.703 --> 00:03:53.289 "Like... like... Michael. Michael. Michael! Stop this." 00:03:53.289 --> 00:03:54.703 "Stop. No, shhh." 00:03:55.203 --> 00:03:56.654 No, she's... Michael: You've gotta ship. 00:03:56.654 --> 00:03:58.729 She's... she's like "Shhhh." 00:03:58.729 --> 00:03:59.653 Be shipped. 00:04:00.717 --> 00:04:03.680 "Just, stop. Get some help." 00:04:05.582 --> 00:04:09.590 "Trixie... Trixie... uh, is sad for you." 00:04:09.590 --> 00:04:10.641 Boop this pony. 00:04:10.641 --> 00:04:12.741 I'm sad, too. I don't have a Trixie plush. 00:04:12.741 --> 00:04:16.551 "Trixie... Trixie needs... Trixie needs you... to shut the f*** up." 00:04:16.664 --> 00:04:18.232 # 00:04:18.232 --> 00:04:20.910 Um... just keep the Twitch video published. It's perfect. 00:04:22.036 --> 00:04:24.985 No, that's one of those things when it comes down to editing. 00:04:24.985 --> 00:04:29.916 There is just going to be a complete separate channel of someone just publishing all of this nonsense. 00:04:29.916 --> 00:04:33.695 Trixie, get your face down here. Um.... oh. 00:04:33.695 --> 00:04:39.000 Okay, when I said "get your face down here", that's not quite what I meant. 00:04:39.088 --> 00:04:41.146 "Is there something... is there something on my face?" 00:04:41.146 --> 00:04:44.557 Uh oh... that that that makes it worse... no. 00:04:45.133 --> 00:04:47.525 Well, that... I don't think that makes it work. 00:04:47.525 --> 00:04:48.990 Okay, um... 00:04:50.429 --> 00:04:52.399 What is this face? 00:04:52.399 --> 00:04:55.944 Trixie, give... give us your best Vogue face. 00:04:55.944 --> 00:04:56.844 She's like BAM. 00:04:58.321 --> 00:04:59.438 "Is Trixie sexy?" 00:04:59.538 --> 00:05:00.235 <<TF2 Soldier voice>> No! 00:05:00.423 --> 00:05:01.282 "Ohhh" 00:05:01.282 --> 00:05:04.096 I don't think I can do anything do to this that won't just make it creepier. 00:05:04.547 --> 00:05:06.920 Nope, that's still creepier. Um... 00:05:06.920 --> 00:05:11.390 We're going to fix Trixie because this is getting a little... uh... she doesn't want to be fixed. 00:05:11.390 --> 00:05:12.728 This is me now. 00:05:13.291 --> 00:05:15.366 Like... like, just... 00:05:15.366 --> 00:05:17.081 "Just love me as I am." 00:05:17.244 --> 00:05:20.772 # 00:05:20.772 --> 00:05:23.388 "No... no, everybody makes fun of me." 00:05:23.663 --> 00:05:24.937 "Give me hug." 00:05:25.488 --> 00:05:29.491 No... no, you take back your nose and then we'll think about it. 00:05:29.491 --> 00:05:30.883 There we go. Okay, she fixed! 00:05:30.883 --> 00:05:35.677 I'm going to go use the restroom quick... um... because I drank through that first drink really quick. 00:05:35.677 --> 00:05:39.443 So we're going to do that. I'll be back in, like, 30 seconds. 00:05:39.443 --> 00:05:43.930 ♪ siren plays ♪ 00:05:44.043 --> 00:05:49.756 # 00:05:49.756 --> 00:05:53.077 "It was at this moment that he knew... he f'd up." 00:05:53.077 --> 00:05:54.971 Okay, I think everything is fine. 00:05:54.971 --> 00:05:56.040 Okay. 00:05:56.566 --> 00:06:00.209 I'm glad, because you would have been upset. 00:06:00.209 --> 00:06:02.602 So Celestia, she's looking around. 00:06:02.602 --> 00:06:04.423 Cus' she's like "no..." 00:06:06.275 --> 00:06:07.982 "I... I... don't look." 00:06:07.982 --> 00:06:10.736 "This is... this is not for children." 00:06:11.062 --> 00:06:13.910 She puts the ketchup on... on the cake. 00:06:13.910 --> 00:06:16.343 "It's okay. It's... it's delicious." 00:06:16.343 --> 00:06:20.592 "That's disgusting. You know you... you don't put ketchup on cake." 00:06:20.592 --> 00:06:23.981 "You... you put... put other cake on cake." 00:06:23.981 --> 00:06:27.350 And then she puts this cake in her face. 00:06:27.350 --> 00:06:31.699 Celestia says "I take exception to this" and eats the cake. There was a big problem with that. 00:06:31.699 --> 00:06:36.000 She's diabetic. And so she's... she gets... she gets all the fat. 00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:37.518 It went straight to her hips. 00:06:37.518 --> 00:06:43.855 She thought somethings weirds going on, so she kind of looks down here and she's... uh oh. Need help. 00:06:43.855 --> 00:06:46.963 So, then Trixie does... does what Trixie does. 00:06:46.963 --> 00:06:50.152 "That's... that's disgusting. But I can help." 00:06:51.000 --> 00:06:51.942 She poke. 00:06:52.856 --> 00:06:55.678 Then Celestia becomes Ultimate Celestia. 00:06:55.678 --> 00:06:58.079 Oh no. She... she grew big. 00:06:58.079 --> 00:07:00.000 "BEHOLD MY POWER." 00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:01.957 That the power that cake brings. 00:07:01.957 --> 00:07:05.149 She looks up at the ultimate being and she's like: 00:07:05.149 --> 00:07:08.250 "You're... you're not the only one with super powers, Celesta-bi***" 00:07:08.250 --> 00:07:10.031 And... ah... and then she's like WOOSH. 00:07:10.031 --> 00:07:12.413 "I will... I will take you on!" 00:07:12.413 --> 00:07:15.000 And then she... uh... 00:07:15.000 --> 00:07:18.277 She... she lifts her... lifts her hoof. 00:07:18.277 --> 00:07:20.295 And she's... ehh. 00:07:20.946 --> 00:07:22.951 Eh. Eh. 00:07:22.951 --> 00:07:25.878 You know. You like that? You... you take this. 00:07:25.878 --> 00:07:28.516 The hoof technique. Poke. Poke poke. 00:07:28.516 --> 00:07:31.131 Celestia... ah, she's like "ERRR". 00:07:31.131 --> 00:07:34.289 "Like, that that kinda hurts. I... I can do that too!" 00:07:34.289 --> 00:07:38.396 She goes a step further. She has two. She chokes the Trixie. 00:07:38.396 --> 00:07:40.678 And then Trixie deflates. 00:07:40.678 --> 00:07:41.354 No... 00:07:41.354 --> 00:07:43.517 Uh, like "I've been defeated." 00:07:43.517 --> 00:07:46.316 I'm... I'm gonna go... gonna go play video games. 00:07:48.155 --> 00:07:50.890 Actually, house... house is this way. We'll go this way. 00:07:51.215 --> 00:07:52.526 "Screw you Celestia." 00:07:52.526 --> 00:07:55.923 The important question though is, when do they kiss? 00:07:55.923 --> 00:07:58.111 They're... they're fighting over territory. 00:07:58.111 --> 00:08:01.493 They're just... they're just beating each other. They're like headbutting. 00:08:01.493 --> 00:08:03.131 They're boopin' snoots. 00:08:03.131 --> 00:08:06.209 Um, so 20 subs if they kiss. No. 00:08:06.209 --> 00:08:09.231 Yeah, he makes the ponies kiss after he turns off the streams. 00:08:09.231 --> 00:08:15.974 Like, as soon as he turns off the streams he's like "okay, they're not watching anymore." Then it's just ponies kissin' for the next 2 hours.